Well, I still don't think it quite explains away Emma keeping Killian at arms length earlier on, but at least we got some sort of explanation of her emotional state this time. Makes it a little easier to get in her head, even if only in the vacuum of this specific episode. So I figured I'd try Emma on for size this time. For as lovely as that kiss was, there were still a few things that needed to be brought up with respect to what she said.
No spoilers for the next episode other than the obvious from the promo for the next episode – they're going to go on a date. This is me trying to A) address some missing things in their conversation and B) bridge the gap between those emotions and getting to their traditional date of the next episode.
And as always, many fics related to this episode are expected; any similarities to other stories are purely coincidental.
Out in the Open
Overwhelmed, Emma pulled away from the kiss, resituating herself in Killian's arms with her head tucked under his chin and her face pressed to his chest. She clung to him, knowing she was overreacting, but still terrified both of the possibility of losing him and of the fact that she has just admitted as much to his face. She squeezed her eyes closed in an attempt to block the vision of him stuck there, frozen to the ground with ice daggers raining down around him. She tried to force herself to relax in his embrace, to focus on the soothing brush of his fingers through her hair, but…
Headlights flashed, brakes squealed, and a horn honked, accompanied by one of the dwarves screaming down the street at them.
Emma jumped a mile, inadvertently knocking her head on Killian's chin as they both turned to face the glare of the headlights.
"Oh shit," she gasped, her heart racing.
Luckily Killian had more of his wits about him and lurched into motion first. He grabbed her hand, leading her out of the center of the street as he nodded at the grumbling dwarf driving away. "Well, neither one of us going to make if we get run over by one of those out here in the middle of the road," he chuckled.
Reaching her Bug, Emma ran her hands nervously through her hair as she turned back to face Killian. She took a deep breath, looking down as she mumbled, "I'm sorry I'm crazy, I just…" How could she put into words just how much he'd come to mean to her and how much that fact scared the living daylights out of her?
Before she could figure out how to finish her sentence, he was there. Close enough that she could feel his body heat radiating, his face a breath away from hers. He lifted his hand to gently cup her cheek and force her to look at him. "Swan," he said softly, his voice gently and understanding, "I'm no stranger to loss either, love. You know of Milah. And…" He trailed off, breaking their locked gazes to look up briefly. When turned back to her again, Emma sucked in a sharp breath at the sight of unshed tears glistening in his eyes. "Not days ago, I thought the whole thing repeating itself," he whispered harshly. "You were dying, Emma," he managed to croak out, his voice cracking and thick with emotion, "and there wasn't a bloody thing I could do."
Emma's face crumpled, tears returning unbidden to her own eyes at the mention of Milah. Of course he knew exactly how the sting of loss felt. And she'd still managed to snap at him, shut him out, and make it all about her. She was not good at relationships. Letting out a soft sigh and swiped at the one escaped tear on her cheek before lifting her head up again to offer a sheepish apology. "I know, I'm-"
The thumb of his hand landed on her lips to cut her off and quiet her as he stroked her cheek again, one eyebrow cheekily raised as he did so. "But if I were to tell you to stay out of danger by, I don't know," he hedged, "staying home with your mother to tend to your infant brother… For one," he smirked, "you wouldn't listen to me either. And two," he continued, his voice once again taking on a breathier, broken timbre, "you wouldn't be the same Swan I've been chasing since that bloody beanstalk."
In spite of herself, Emma let out a sniffly snort of a laugh and rolled her eyes good-naturedly "…and you didn't exactly turn into a pirate by sitting around in an office. I get it," she acknowledged. And true enough, she reasoned to herself, there was probably a reason – aside from the monkey thing – that she was less than chomping at the bit to accept bland, boring old Walsh's proposal.
A wide grin spread across Killian's face. "True enough, love," he said, inching ever closer to her as she backed up against the door of the Bug, his hand and hook falling to her waist.
"So now what?" she inquired, offering a wan smile in return. "You die, I die, that's the end of it?" she snarked, grinning slyly as she reached out to toy with the embellishments on his vest.
Killian chuckled, running his hand up and down her side as he nudged his way closer to stand between her slightly spread legs. "Well, I bloody hope that won't be happening for a good while."
Shivering at his touch, but not stopping his advances, Emma smirked in response.
"But instead of you pulling away from me," Killian continued with a grin, ever the convincing pragmatist, "wouldn't these impending deaths of ours be all the more reason to spend some quality time together when we have the chance?"
Emma let herself smile in response and eyed him coyly. "Maybe, yeah…"
She'd kissed him before, and he'd kissed her just a few minutes ago, but this could have been considered the first where they simply melted into each other, neither having to prove something. Emma's hands slid up his chest so she could wrap her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss, with Killian leaning ever so slightly against her, just barely pressing her to the side of her car.
As his tongue danced with hers, Emma sighed into his mouth. It was too late; he was absolutely right. Keeping him locked away at arm's length wouldn't do a bit of good. She was too far gone, despite her best efforts to not get swept up in the man that was Killian Jones. Still… Breathless, she pulled back reluctantly, pressing her hands flat against his chest. "But you do know I'm crazy, right?" she warned, leaning away from him. "Hook, I do want this – us," she admitted, feeling a faint blush tinge her cheeks as she did so, "but wasn't even good in normal relationships before this mess. Now I'm in fairytale land with Captain Hook and an evil Ice Queen on the lam? I don't even…" she trailed off, not even sure how to end her own sentence, given the utter ridiculousness of what she was saying. And living.
Killian seemed unfazed. Using his hook, he carefully swept a stray lock of her hair behind her hair as he smiled at her. "Let's do normal then, lass. I'd be happy to do so if you would be so kind as to explain what normal is in this realm in terms of a man and a woman spending time together." He paused for half a beat before adding thoughtfully, "Aside from 'net-flicks', of course."
"Normal?" Emma snorted at the near impossibility of such a notion there in Storybrooke. But he was waiting so earnestly for a real answer… "Dating is normal," she said, shrugging. "Dinner, movie, picnics, drinks…" She bit her lip, at a loss. It's not like they could go catch a Broadway show or a Bruins game like she would have in the last few places she'd lived. "Bowling?" She ventured, "I don't know…" She stopped when she spotted Killian's brow furrowed in mild confusion. She eyed him with an eyebrow raised.
"Dating?" he ventured cautiously.
She rolled her eyes again, recalling the same hesitance when she'd sprung the cell phone on him. "Like, I don't know, courting?" she offered with a shrug. "Is that a thing you guys had? Spending time together, going on dates…"
The wide grin he suddenly sported told her that something had clicked in his brain. But she was caught off guard when he suddenly backed away from her and the Bug, grabbing her hand and tugging her back out into the street. "Then let's go on a date, love," he said exuberantly. "What shall we do?"
"Not now!" Emma squealed, taken by surprise by how quickly he'd been able to turn her overly emotional self into the likes of a giggling teenager. She pulled on her arm, tugging him back out of the street. "You plan dates ahead of time," she explained with a soft smile, though touched by his insistence they go now. She glanced down the road in the direction of her parents' loft, continuing, "Plus I was on my way to have dessert with my parents. I think my mom's finally going to snap after being around the kid 24/7…"
"Ah," Killian nodded in recognition, releasing her hand and stepping back with an overdramatized bow. "Well, I won't stand in the way of a family obligation."
She stood still, not immediately saying anything in response, but relishing the slight tug she felt in her chest as she watched him. "…come with me?"
It was subtle; she almost didn't catch it, but he definitely froze for a split second upon hearing her words before turning to her with a questioning look in his eyes.
She gave the slightest of nods, and a half smile.
He grinned back, looking like he was trying to temper his reaction, but failing miserable. "As you wish," he replied, before walking around the back of the Bug to the passenger side.
Emma ducked her head as she turned to get in the car, feeling a blush creep up her neck to her cheeks once again. She still had no idea what the hell she was doing, but maybe she'd fight it a little less…
Once they were both settled in their seats in the Bug, she quickly started it up, not allowing herself another glance at Killian just yet. But she stopped herself from driving away immediately. Turning in her seat, she faced him and offered a soft, "Hey…"
He turned to face her, looking a bit surprised that they were not yet driving.
She leaned towards the center of the car and reached to slide her hand over the back of his neck, pulling him gently towards her. Their lips met in a soft kiss, too briefly, but enough. Emma pulled back with a smile. Killian nodded and smiled back as they pulled out to head towards the loft.