Disclaimer: I don't own the character (well other
then the narrator she's mine.) This story idea is mine and mine alone I
didn't take it from anyone so don't take it from me. Yada yada yada....
--------------*--------------
The Final Letter
By: Jaya
Started: 3-25-01
--------------*--------------
*Note: This is based off an idea I have for an
Original fic but decided to try it out as a fan fic first. Also I sorta
imagine it being set around world war I or II so that might give you a
better idea as to the settings, dress and reasons behind in the story.
^_~ Hope you enjoy. JayaKorin@ratedg.com And a big thanks to Yvette who
beta'd it for me. ^___^
--------------*--------------
It was a cold day at the convent that morning
in late March. The last few days had been wonderfully nice, and warm. But
unfortunately it had not stayed so nice, over the past day or so, the weather
taking a turn towards the bad side. Over cast, wet and cold. The kind of
weather that lowered your spirits, and made you want to stay in bed all
day. Yes that was what the weather was like that day in the hospital.
The day before, a new group of wounded from the
front had arrived in the hospital. Being located to one of the newer wards
that had been set up in the east wing. But that had been the most of the
excitement for the last few days and sprits were low.
Now it just so happened that on that day, I was
sitting near one of the closed windows, next to one of the beds. On the
bed next to me lay a young man, his name was Sage. Sage Date. At least
that's what was written on the clip board at the foot of the bed. He'd
arrived in the ward about two weeks ago, counting today. However, though
he would recover, he would not regain the use of his eyes, and would probably
be confined to a wheel chair most of his life.
/I feel sorry for him./ He seems like a
nice young man, we have talked often now and then. About many things, except
the war. We talk about our homes, our loved ones and so forth. But during
our time together, unlike the others he has never asked me to write a letter
for him, and as far as I know none of the other nurses have either. Until
today that is.
It happened this morning, when I was just arriving
in the ward. I don't know how he knew it was me who'd come it, but he knew,
somehow. Motioning me over, I had to lean close to hear what he was saying.
He said in his soft voice. "Ari, will you. Will
you write a letter for me?" Just like that. I thought I caught the hint
of something else in his voice, but that was all. A simple little question
and yet there was something about it that caught at my heart. Something
about the way he said it.
"Alright, Sage." I replied nodding my head, though
I knew he could not see me. I have his hand a squeeze, as I turned. "Let
me go get some paper, ok?"
"Ok." He replied turning his head as if he was
watching me go. Even though he could not see through the bandages that
covered most of his face, leaving just enough room, so that he could speak.
--------------*--------------
When I returned a few minutes later, he was still
sitting there, on the bed. Though someone has propt up the pillows behind
him a bit, so that he could sit up more. His hands folded on top of the
blankets, a sort of sad thoughtful poster to his position. Though it was
hard to tell being unable to see his face. I wasn't sure, Sage had always
been someone what of a mystery to me. Kind, and thoughtfull and yet quiet
and moody at times, harder to read the most of the other eager young men
in the ward.
"I'm back Sage." I said pulling up a chair and
sitting down. Glancing down at the small pad of paper in my lap I turned
back to him. "I got some paper."
"I know." He replied in that voice of his, and
I could almost believe that he had truly known. Perhaps he had, I do not
know there was something about Sage, that made you believe he did or could
know things he logically should know have been able to know.
Carefully I picked up my pen, setting the tip
on the paper. For a moment she thought that he wasn't going to speak that
perhaps he had forgotten about the letter, about her. But she dismissed
that idea rather fast as the young man lying the bed took a slow deep breath.
She looked up at him studying his half hidden face for a moment, trying
to figure out what was going through his exceptionally sharp mind.
"Dear Rowen." He said finally his voice low so
that only she could hear. There was something about the sound of it, something
sad that made her want to cry. /But if I cry over everything that makes
me want to cry then I wouldn't be here./ She told herself sternly,
focusing only on him.
"Dear Rowen," Sage repeated softly, before going
on with the rest of the letter, and she wrote what he said carefully and
neatly. Somehow she knew that it was important, not just to him.
Hello Friend. This is Sage, I guess you
probably never thought that you would hear from me again. Not after the
way we last parted...
/So that's why he never wrote letters... Never
talked about his home or his family. I wonder what happened to his parents.../
She thought, as he paused as if to collected his thoughts again. /Poor
soul/
Forgive me Rowen. I don't know why it was
so hard to say before, why I couldn't just come out and say it. I've thought
about that day, that moment so many times since then. It's still hard to
say somehow, and I still don't know. I wish I could have said it then,
or at least could have said it to your face. I'm sorry, Oh lord you have
no idea how sorry I am. So please forgive me my foolishness, for I fear
I won't be able to tell you in person, now.
He stopped again suddenly seized by a fit of coughs.
Setting the letter down she picked up the small cup of water that sat on
the table next to her.
"Sage would you like a drink of water?" She asked
quietly, waiting for the last round to finish, before leaning in too close.
"Yes... yes please." He whispered his voice rough
and dry.
"Here you go." Carefully she took his hand and
wrapped it around the cup, helping him sit up slightly. Though she was
not sure he entirely needed, she could never tell. Some patients were easily
to read you knew when they needed help and it was easy. Others were stubborn
and wanted to do things them selves no matter whether they should or not.
She was a good nurse yes, she knew what to do and when to do it, but it
was those little in between times that always caught her off guard and
she hated it.
He turned towards her, and she took the cup back.
Setting it on the table she sat down, picking up the note pad and pen again.
"Ready?"
The young man in the bed hesitated for a moment
and then nodded his head ever so slightly. There was a small grimace on
his face, but it vanished just as it had appeared. "Yes, I'm ready."
Rowen I know your probably thinking this
is some kind of joke or something, because I know you would recognize my
writing. You know this isn't my writing. Well I must tell you that I am
not writing this letter, someone is writing it for me. Someone I... I know
I can trust. You see, after I left I joined the army, and well I've seen
more then I ever wanted to see. This isn't war Touma, not like you and
I know it... Neh this is saluter, and those of us here, we're just victims,
in one way or another... Her name is Rose, and I trust her. I wanted to
tell you in person, wanted to write the letter myself, but I can't even
do that.
She was touched by his words more then he would
ever know. The worlds 'I trust her.' rang in her ears and she felt as if
she'd been given some sort of special gift. It was a strange feeling, that
settled in about her, as if she was part of some one time even. That would
never come again, and if you looked away it would be gone before you could
look back.
Well, Rowen, so much has happened since
we last talked, I'm not sure where to start. As you probably guessed, after
I left I decided to join the war, for lack of anything better to do. I
thought of keeping up the school, but I couldn't concentrate, from what
I hear Ryo is doing better with it anyway... And that's basically how I
ended up here. I never. Never stopped thinking of you though, the way you
used to smile at me. Your kiss. I can still feel your lips on mine Rowen,
even now after what? Five years... I still love you. Do you still love
me? Or did you finally decide that Ryo was better after all?
He looked away, his mouth set in a tight lipped
look as he rested his chin on his chest for a moment, looking infinitely
tired. Quietly she read over the words on the page again, understanding
them and yet not at the same time. They sat there so long that she began
to think that perhaps he had fallen a sleep.
"Sage?" Rose asked quietly. "Would you like to
continue this later?"
He jumped slightly as if started out some reviver.
"No.. Have to finish it as soon as possible." There was a hint of weariness
in his voice and she contemplated pushing the point. But there was something
about the blond in the bed next to her that confused Rose to no end. For
some reason she felt compelled to go along with him, so she ignored the
nagging feeling in the back of her mind.
"Alright then." She said quietly. "Let's continue."
How have you been, my friend? Stupid question,
I suppose, I wish I could know, but I'm afraid that I... That I probably
won't be here to hear it from you. That's why I'm writing this letter.
Rowen.. Dear Rowen, I'm dying...
Before either of them could say anything the bell
began to toll out side. Rose jumped, glancing towards the door at the far
end of the ward, his last words flying from her mind. Quickly standing
up she set the pad of paper on the stand next to him, the pen on top of
it.
"I have to go Sage, we have new patents coming
in, their going to need my help." Rose hesitated. "I will be back just
as soon as I can to finish."
"Promise?" He whispered. "Please, Promise?" He
grasped her hand holding on tighter then she would have thought possible.
But then he always had been able to surprise her.
"I promise Sage." She answered giving his hand
a slight squeeze. "I promise. You try and get some rest, for when I get
back, ok?"
"Ok." came the soft response. But she never heard
it as she was already hurrying back down the ward towards the doors.
/Lord be with that boy./ Rose thought, whipping her hand across her
skirt. /He's a strange one that Sage is. Watch over him./ That done
she pushed through the doors hurrying to wash her hands before the real
work began and she could already see the first set of patients being brought
up the stairs on stretchers.
--------------*--------------
It wasn't until dusk that Rose managed to make
her way back to Sage's bed. When she arrived she found that the young blond
man, was already sleep. Or at least so she assumed from his shallow almost
regular breathing.
Shaking her head, she carefully made sure that
his blankets were securely tucked in around him. That done, Rose pulled
the curtain's around him shut so that he could sleep in half primacy.
With a yawn she headed out of the ward and down
the stairs. /Maybe some supper, and then bed.../ She scrubbed her
face with her hands, trying to hide another yawn. Stepping into the 'ladies
room', she splashed some cold water on her face, and straightened her hair
in the mirror.
/You look like hell./ Rose told herself
with a grimace. /Ah who cares what you look like. Dinner, bed. Dinner,
bed. Sleep. Remember?/
"Long day Rose?"
She turned to find her friend, Betty standing
in the door way. "Yeah you could say that... What about you?"
"No longer then usual. So what's up I saw you
taking a letter for that Date kid earlier. I thought he didn't write letters."
She walked over, to peer into the mirror. Pretending to fix her already
perfect hair.
Rose sighed. "Well he is now."
"Your worried about him."
"Truth. Yeah I am."
"Why?"
"Well. He's not doin so good Betty, and he keeps
talking about how he's not going to make it. I think he know's he's going
to die even if Dr. Mercy hasn't given up hope yet. That's why he's writing
the letter."
"Well you know what they say. You shouldn't become
personally involved with your patents. Come on Rose, I think your starting
to talk this personal."
"Awe Betty. Don't tell me you've never felt sorry
from one of the lad's in there. The kid has no family, and no one else
to be around for him. If he's going to die I sure won't let him do it alone."
"You can't save everyone Rose."
"I know that." Rose sighed.
"Sometimes I wonder if you do." Betty turned to
her friend giving her a piercing stare. As if searching for something,
something she obviously didn't find..
"What is..."
"Come on, we're going to be late for dinner."
With that Betty grabbed Rose's arm and pulled her through the door.
--------------*--------------
Behind the bandages, behind the scared face, inside
the world of dreams. He dreamt. A dream of a far off place, a place that
he had not been in many years. In the arms of a man he had not seen in
just as long a time.
"Rowen." He whispered the name.
Slowly his body stretched, and one strong and
yet refined hand fell across his stomach. What was left of his golden hair
lay about his head on the pillow. But in his dream it was a totally different
story.
---FlashBack---
"Hello Sage." Rowen said smiling at him in a strangely
Rowen, and yet un-Rowen like way. "Come on I have a surprise for you."
"What is it?" Sage asked curiously, as he took
Rowen's hand fallowing the tall, blue haired man through the empty house
and up the stairs. "What do you have for me Rowen?"
"No, no." He shook his head infuriatingly. "I
can't tell you. No that would ruin the surprise." With a mysterious twinkle
in his eye, he turned and climbed the last of the stairs to the landing
at the top.
"Alright fine, be that way." Sage muttered, rather
sulkily, but climbed the rest of the stairs in a rather hurry anyway. He
was curious to see what Rowen was all excited about.
"Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on." An amused
look passed across Sage's light features as he looked up to find Rowen
hopping excitedly from one foot to the other, the biggest grin you have
ever seen on his face.
Shaking his head, Sage picked up his pace a just
a little covering the space between them in a couple of seconds. His blue
haired friend took his hands and pulled him into the room before he even
hada chance to see what was inside.
Pushing the door closed, Rowen pushed Sage up
against the door, an intensity in his eyes that Sage hadn't seen before.
"Well Sage?" Rowen whispered his lips brushing against Sage's. "What do
you think?"
"About what?" Sage asked, as Rowen pressed his
body against his.
"About my surprise." Replied Rowen, with an evil
little grin. Then just as suddenly he pushed away from Sage. "I... I love
you Sage." He said a couple seconds later, turning back to meet Sage's
clear violet gaze with his own intense blue one. "That's my surprise..."
---EndFlashBack---
Carefully sitting up slightly, Sage reached his
hand over to where he knew the small night stand sat. His breath come in
short gasps, and his hand shook slightly. Carefully he pushed the curtain
out of the way, fumbling for the glass of water he knew sat there.
Finally he hand closed about the cool surface
of the tin cup. Slowly he sat up a little bit more, biting his lip as pain
spasmed through his body. Sage managed to get a sip of the water, almost
spilling it twice before he gave up.
He only half managed to get the cup back on the
night stand. Unfortunately spilling the rest of it across the top and onto
the floor. But he never noticed as he fell back down onto the bed.
After that sleep was slow in coming, and soon
the memories began to plague his mind again.
---FlashBack---
The crystal clear moon over head, was soft as
it streamed down through the half darkness of midnight. They lay in the
soft grass by the water shore, the song of the crickets and the gentle
sound of the water lapping against the bead the only sound.
Look over at Sage, Rowen burst out into another
fit, of laughter. His sparkling blue eyes slowly fallowed the curve f Sage's
body. He liked the way that his wet cloths stuck to his body, showing it
of quite nicely. Blushing Rowen quickly looked away, laying back in the
grass he turned his eyes towards the million glittering stars in the heavens.
"Next time we should go skinny dipping instead
of just jumping in with our cloths on." Sage said with an evil little grin.
"What do you think, my love?"
"I think it sounds like fun, but I bet you wouldn't
dare do it." Rowen, said teasingly.
"Oh really?" Sage stood up decisively, grinning.
"Then watch me."
"I would love to." Rowen said leaning back with
his hands behind his head, watching Sage intently. "Well are you going
to take them off, or are you just going to stand there all night?" He asked
finally.
Sage stuck his tongue out at Rowen, but with a
quick glance around, that made Rowen laugh. He began taking his cloths,
off. Shirt fallowed by, shoes and socks. For a moment he stood there, and
then turned around slipping his pants off as he did so. Rowen caught his
breath in the cool quiet of the night, as the boxers landed on top of the
stack.
