Mr. Simmons' Thanksgiving
Though Robert Simmons was an unrivaled optimist, uncontrollable and unwanted pressures on his personal life constantly tested his faith and hope. Naturally, he sought solace in his longtime partner Peter, an insufferable Big Bob's Beepers employee, but said outside forces would alienate the couple for kicks. One November night in Robert's Hillwood City condo, Peter had just arrived when Robert received a phone call from a bitter middle-aged woman whom he had not spoken to in a couple years—his mother.
"Robert, darling, this is your mother speaking," she said in a raspy Agatha Caulfield-esque voice.
"Oh, hi, Mom," Robert meekly responded, rubbing his hands together in nervousness as he signaled for Peter to remain silent.
"My friend Chuck's daughter Joy just moved to Hillwood City and she'd love to meet you," said Mrs. Simmons, "and you know, I'd like to be there to introduce you."
"I see. That's nice," said Robert.
"I don't have a Thanksgiving dinner planned yet," continued Mrs. Simmons. "You don't suppose you could invite the three of us, do you?"
"Well, I don't know, Mom, you know it's awfully rude to invite yourself over to someone's house like that…"
"Robert Richard Simmons, how dare you talk to your own mother like that!"
Uh-oh, middle name, thought Robert. "Well, I guess it would be swell to have the five of us together for Thanksgiving at my place!"
"Five? Who else is coming?"
Robert shot an uneasy glance at Peter and then stared into space. "I guess I miscounted."
"You must be a fine teacher," said Mrs. Simmons, and hung up. "Peter, that was my mother. She wants to fix me up with an old friend of hers. Chuck's daughter."
Peter bent his unibrow in shock. "You mean Uncle Chuck? I knew your mother's ideas were backward, but I never thought she'd force you to marry your cousin!"
"Chuck is just a family friend. My mother's family refers to their close friends as aunts and uncles," explained Robert, and headed into his study. Robert always prepared lectures and other activities for his P.S. 118 class in his study, and Peter knew better than to pry or disturb his lover during such busy hours of preparation.
Robert would be introducing a Thanksgiving play to his students the following day, and although he had already woven a turkey costume for himself to wear during school hours, he had previously experienced difficulty writing a proficient script besides the historical elements. However, his frustrating family situation proved to enlighten him creatively, and he began to work in a final scene reflecting the ideal situation for the dreaded upcoming meal.