A/N: So yeah, I have a bit of writers block for A Beautiful Disaster, I can't figure out how the apology should go and what Sandy should say, do you guys have any ideas? if so please let me know. :)

Now, this story idea came to me after watching the latest episodes of Rookie Blue, its more dark than what i usually write, so just beware. The titles for each chapter come from Demi Lovato's cd Unbroken. She is my biggest inspiration and her music has helped me through some very tough times.

I hope you like this story.

Disclaimer: I do not own Rookie Blue or anything Demi Lovato.

SHATTERED

Chapter 1 – Mistake

It has been 4 days since she talked to Sam. It has been 4 days that Sam has avoided her. It has been 4 days since Jerry lost his life and today was his funeral. This was not how it was supposed to be; Jerry and Traci were supposed to get married and have their happily ever after. Instead they watched as Jerry's coffin was lowered into the ground, forcing them to say goodbye.

Sam did not look away from the coffin throughout the whole service, the watch weighed heavy in his pocket. His best friend was gone and he wasn't coming back. Sam knew she was watching him but he refused to meet her eyes. He knew she was hurting, but so was he.

After the funeral, everybody met at the Black Penny for a final toast to their fallen friend. Traci tearfully read the speech that Jerry had written for their wedding and there wasn't a dry eye in the pub. That and seeing the seat in which Jerry always sat, empty, was more than Sam could take, so he left.

"Sam" he heard her call his name and he stopped in his tracks.

They stood in silence for a minute or so before she spoke again, "You were right, the guy was playing me"

"Sorry" was all he said

"You know for the record, I would do it again, because if there was even a small chance that he was telling the truth…"

"I know, you're right, it's our job" he replied

She could tell that this was the last place he wanted to be right now, talking to her. But all she wanted to do is help him, whether he wanted it or not. "I know you're grieving, I know we all grieve in our own way… but don't take this out on me"

Sam finally met her eyes "I did take it out on you, sorry"

"If you really blame me for Jerry…"

"I don't" he interrupted her "I blame myself, I should have followed my gut and went with Jerry, instead I listened to you. I got into the habit of listening to a rookie's instincts instead of my own". He saw the hurt in her eyes, something she could never hide from him.

"I…if you don't blame me, then why are you mad at me?" she asked him

"I'm not mad, I just…I can't do this anymore" he sighed

"Can't do what?" she asked through her tears, dreading the answer

"I can't be a cop and be with you" when he said it, he knew he should take it back but he just couldn't

"Sam, this is not about our job" she said

"We knew this was trouble, even before we started…"

"Okay look" it was her turn to interrupt "I'm trying to talk to you, I want to go through this with you're…I know you're hurting"

"Maybe you're right, maybe I'm not myself, I don't know…but this is my feeling, in my gut, right now alright" he hated hurting her, but he felt he had to. He couldn't live with himself if because of his judgment she got killed too "I can't do this anymore" he repeated.

"No, you don't mean this" she sobbed

"Someday, we'll be able to be friends"

"Don't do that" she cried like a wounded animal "Don't take everything we are and button up our relationship with some stupid cliché…are you saying it's over?"

Sam had no idea what to say, so he said nothing.

"Then leave" she whispered, heartbroken "Just get in your truck and go"

He looked at her remorsefully, but now it was her turn not to meet his eyes, and he left.

Andy watched her life drive away.

The next morning at work, she found out that Sam had taken another undercover assignment, taking her heart with him.

Two weeks later, everything at the station seemed back to normal, well as normal as it could be with the circumstances. Traci put up a good front, but Andy knew her friend well enough that working everyday at 15 division and seeing Jerry's empty desk and living in a house that she would never share with him again, was tearing her apart inside.

"Andy? Can I come in?" Traci asked from the other side of the door of the hotel room Andy was staying in until she finds a new place.

"Yeah" Andy replied, welcoming her in "Is everything alright?"

"Um yeah, I just…" Traci sighed "I can't do this anymore"

Andy immediately flashed back to that night outside the penny, when Sam said those exact words, the pain she felt then came rushing back. She knew what was coming.

"I can't keep seeing his empty desk at work, living in a house that we shared and know he's never going to walk through that door again" Traci continued "There's a job opening in Sudbury…I wanted to tell you before you found out from someone else, I…I'm taking the job, it's something I have to do"

"I understand" Andy told her and she really did, but it still hurt that her best friend was leaving.

Traci gave Andy a sad smile "I'll come visit, I promise"

Andy gave a small smile "I know you will, I'll come visit you to"

"Are we okay?" Traci asked, sensing Andy's sadness

"We're great Traci" Andy replied with a reassuring smile

"Good" Traci said, then she asked "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine" Andy answered, although she was anything but.

Traci had left about a week ago, and Andy tried to carry on as usual but it was becoming increasingly difficult. Her mother trying to insert herself back into Andy's life was beginning to wear her thin; and if that wasn't enough, her mother being back drove Tommy to start drinking again after a year of sobriety. Everything just seemed to keep spiraling down.

So what did you think? I have the second chapter written and the other chapters all planned out. Would you want to read more?

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Luv ya!