So uh this is kinda long since I decided to do the CISCO RAMON unit based on S1 and S2 but I thought you guys deserved an exclusive :)
I really hope you guys don't mind this cause this is over 1000 words and I usually aim my "User's Guide and Manuals" for under 1000 words. This is even longer than some of my chapters in Ultimate Betrayal...
Enjoy please!
The User's Guide and Manual for:
The Exclusive CISCO RAMON Unit
Manufacturer: S1 &S2 Central City Inc.
Congratulations! You have won one out of the ten exclusive life sized CISCO RAMON units. We thank you for participating in our contest. Please follow all specifications listed below to maximize your enjoyment of the exclusive CISCO RAMON unit. Note: the exclusive CISCO RAMON unit is brought to you by the cooperation of S1 & S2 Central City Inc.
Technical Specifications:
Name: Cisco Ramon
Alias: Vibe
Age: 26
Height: 5'6"
Weight: 195lb
Resident of: Central City
Accessories:
10 sets of misc. t-shirts
1 vibing goggles
1 set of STAR labs COPYRIGHTED computers
3 extra sets of the CISCO copyrighted The Flash suits
1 bag of lollipops
Misc. invention(s)
Misc. tools
Misc. materials
Programming:
Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will arrive programmed with seven general functions.
Engineer: Do you have a complicated engineering project due next week? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will happily help and may even take over the entire project for you. Note: Be sure to not criticize on anything your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit makes.
Viber: Are you running away from someone with a dangerous reputation? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit can vibe where this person is. Note: Do not complain if your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit is not able to vibe. Reasons may include lack of adrenaline and/or being in a different universe.
Tailor: Do you have a comic convention and have no idea how to make your Darth Vader cosplay? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will gladly help. Note: Be sure to not criticize the costume.
Namer: Have no idea what to name your new hamster? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will eagerly name your little hamster or any other pet/car/technologies/family member/friend/stranger for you. Note: Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will insist on the name it gives even if you don't like it.
Nerd: Have you forgotten who Luke Skywalker's father is? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will explain to you everything within the Star Wars Universe as well as other fictional universes. Note: You may be required to sit through a Star Wars marathon of the complete saga if you ask this of it.
Techy: Do you have a problem with your hard drive? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit will easily fix all problems with your computer for you. Note: Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit may not be as skilled as your FELICITY SMOAK unit. It may complain if you say the FELICITY SMOAK unit is better.
Translator: Is your grade in Spanish class currently an F? Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit can be your personal tutor. Note: Be sure not to correct it.
Cleaning:
Your exclusive CISCO RAMON unit is capable of cleaning itself but may need help in cleaning the CISCO copyrighted The Flash suits. Be sure to follow its instructions exactly on how to clean the suit.
Frequently Asked Questions:
Q- My CISCO RAMON unit is sad because it invented something that hurt the BARRY ALLEN unit. How do I cheer it up?
A- You can cheer your CISCO RAMON unit by buying lollipops for it, watching Star Wars with it, and/or binge watching Netflix with it.
Q- My IMPOSTER! HARRISON WELLS unit just shoved his hand through my CISCO RAMON unit's chest. Now, it's just laying there and not moving. Is it dead?
A- It is unfortunately dead. We are sorry for your loss but if you buy a BARRY ALLEN unit, it should fix this.
Q- My CISCO RAMON unit got stung by a bee and its complaining. How do I get it to stop?
A- You cannot but you can reassure and comfort its fear of bees. Note: Be sure to keep it away from all types of bees, wasps, and/or yellowjackets.
Q- My CISCO RAMON unit invented something called a "Boot" and its not letting me touch it because it's only for metahumans. How do I tell it there are no metahumans?
A- If you bought the BARRY ALLEN unit, the JAY GARRICK unit, the HUNTER ZOLOMON unit, the KILLER FROST unit, and/or the MARK MARDON unit, there are metahumans. Your CISCO RAMON unit is also a metahuman.
Q- My CISCO RAMON unit is complaining that SnowJay wouldn't kiss. What is this?
A- SnowJay is its name for the shipping of the JAY GARRICK unit and the CAITLIN SNOW unit.
Q- My CISCO RAMON unit left with the E2 HARRISON WELLS unit and the BARRY ALLEN unit and I can't find them anywhere! I've called the cops and my mom grounded me because she thinks this is a prank. How do I find them?
A- If your CISCO RAMON unit has left with the E2 HARRISON WELLS unit and the BARRY ALLEN unit, they must be on a parallel Earth called Earth-2. All of them should come back soon.
Q- My CISCO RAMON unit just told my BARRY ALLEN unit something and it won't stop screaming. My CAITLIN SNOW unit won't stop crying either. What's happening? My mom is getting really annoyed and I can't do my homework.
A- Your BARRY ALLEN unit is screaming and your CAITLIN SNOW unit is crying because the HUNTER ZOLOMON unit has betrayed them. Leave them alone and they should stop soon. Note: Be sure not to betray any of the units yourself.
Troubleshooting:
My unit can't vibe what Donald Trump is doing! Why? It won't vibe what Hillary Clinton is doing either.
It is listed above in the "Programming" section the reasons why it may not be able to vibe. Another reason may be it is refusing to.
My unit is mad at me. Why?
Have you dirtied one of the CISCO copyrighted The Flash suits, hated on Star Wars, refused to use the name(s) it suggests, destroyed its invention(s), tortured it and its brother, and/or betrayed the BARRY ALLEN unit? Please be more specific.
Why can't I sue S1 Central City Inc. for my detentions at school. It forced me to stay home to watch a Star Wars marathon.
This issue is listed above in the "Programming" section and you have been forewarned. Therefore, you cannot sue us.
My unit forced me to stay home from school because of a cold and it won't stop complaining because I stayed up all night yesterday studying for a test. Apparently sleep deprivation weakens my immune system? What is that and I thought it was supposed to be a male?
You have accidentally ordered the CAITLIN SNOW unit. If you do not wish to keep it, return it immediately. If you do not know what "sleep deprivation" is, please look it up in the dictionary.
My unit is shooting an ice gun all over my house and my mom grounded me for an entire year! How do I get out of jail, convince her to stop grounding me and get my unit to stop shooting ice?
You have accidentally ordered the LEONARD SNART unit. If you do not wish to keep it, return it immediately. We are sorry you are grounded and in jail but we cannot help you. Note: S1 & S2 Central City Inc. is not liable for any jail time, accidents, injuries, self-harms and/or death.
And done! I laughed a bunch typing this and I actually stayed up late last night cause I couldn't go to sleep unless I finished this. Ugh, writer's issues :(
But pleaseeeee review! And a CAITLIN SNOW unit will be coming soon. After that, there will be a poll for you guys to vote on which E2 unit I should do next :)
