More Rules for the Watchtower
Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I own Farrah/Persiana.
AN: In the stunning sequel, Superman puts up even more rules for the Watchtower.
One Shot
Superman was walking down the hall. He had just put up another frame with more rules for the Watchtower, next to the one that had his first ten. (1) The Man of Steel smirked to himself,
This ought to get everyone's attention.
A few minutes went by and Farrah, Supergirl, and Wonder Girl were walking and gossiping. The lioness then saw another framed document and moaned,
"Oh,
come on! Not again!"
Donna studied the document,
"It appears to be more rules."
Farrah looked at Kara,
"Seriously. You have got to tell your cousin to chill out once in a while."
The blonde heroine shook her head,
"Believe me, I've tried."
11) We have private rooms for a reason. Use them if you want to engage in more discreet matters.
Farrah grinned,
"This had to be the time Dinah and Ollie did it in the Javelin."
Kara rolled her eyes,
"I'm not surprised. I heard he likes doing it in the kitchen."
Donna was confused,
"Doing what, sisters?"
Both of them shot the Amazon a knowing look. Donna blinked,
"I still do not know what…"
It then occurred to her,
"Oh, gods."
She grimaced,
"Horrid."
The lioness shrugged,
"It could be worse; Diana and Batman could be doing it in the Batcave."
Supergirl asked,
"On the floor; or in the Batmobile?"
Farrah thought it over before responding,
"Amazon's discretion."
12) Persiana, you are not allowed anymore catnip. (2)
Persiana groaned,
"That
is so unfair! That was one time!"
Donna remembered,
"What about the time you sniffed it while in Metropolis?"
Kara slapped her knee, laughing,
"I remember that! She ran around naked, screaming, 'I love you all!' I never saw Lex run so fast in my life! He had to get a restraining order against you!"
Farrah shot her friend a withering look,
"Yeah, laugh at me, why don't you?"
Wonder Girl thought to herself,
She definitely does like to work out. It shows.
13) If you use the simulator, it's your job to fix it and clean up the mess.
Farrah nodded,
"This has Hawkgirl written all over it. I swear; I don't know what John's doing wrong that she has a bad mood all the time."
Donna looked at her friend,
"She is not the only one, sister. You set the conditions that everyone you fight looks like Catman."
Persiana shook her head,
"Like that's MY fault the guy has a fantasy about me! Besides, all those lame come-ons he tries to pull are getting old."
She then realized,
"Oh, crap. If Tigra ever found out…I would never be able to live it down."
Kara smirked,
"If he saw Tigra, he'd try to have kittens with her, too."
Farrah nodded,
"You got a point."
14) We do not torture villains. We are superheroes and try and rehabilitate those that break the law.
Kara and Donna immediately looked at Farrah. The feline acrobat looked back, asking innocently,
"Why are you two giving me that look?"
Wonder Girl said,
"Remember that time at the restaurant with Catman?" (3)
Farrah shrugged,
"He deserved it. So I found a few new uses for kitchen appliances and kitchen utensils. So what?"
Kara looked at her,
"Farrah,
the restaurant had to close down. They had to call in a priest to
cleanse the place of demons and devils. Not to mention, Ollie had to
pay a huge fine for health code violations not see in over one
hundred years!"
Donna added,
"And there was the time you broke into LexCorp, tied up Luthor, and made him watch all the seasons of the Simpsons one episode right after the other. By the time you finished, he actually thought he was Homer Simpson."
Farrah shrugged,
"So?"
"He nearly ate every donut in Metropolis!"
Kara grinned,
"And let's not forget that time you posted pictures of Deadshot in drag all over the Internet."
Donna also had the same grin,
"Or the time you spread that nasty rumor that Catwoman had Hepatitis."
Farrah rolled her eyes,
"OK, that last one is true. I mean, she uses the whip not only as a burglar, but also as a dominatrix. I don't know if half her clients know where that thing's been, or what she does with it after hours."
15) We do not let politics interfere with our jobs. And, if you are going to make a political statement, do so when you're sober.
Farrah laughed,
"This was the time Diana got plastered and spoke at that women's right's convention! I saw the video on-line."
Donna covered her head,
"I was never more embarrassed before than that day. Gods, what was Diana thinking?"
Kara grinned,
"It didn't help matters that there was an exhibit next door on ancient Grecian weapons and armor. It looked like something out of '300'."
Wonder Girl rolled her eyes,
"Must you laugh at my sister's pain? She found out her most hated enemy is living in the same room as she is." (4)
She turned to Farrah and said,
"Dear
sister, I know you mean well, but Cheetah…she's like you, on more
shameless!"
Kara asked,
"Is that even possible?"
Farrah rolled her eyes,
"Come on, she's not that bad."
Donna sighed,
"Sister, Cheetah put an entire chapter of animal rights activists in a hospital after they tried to abduct her and release her into the wild. Needless to say, you would have done the same thing."
The lioness giggled,
"You're right, I probably would."
16) Do not play pranks on your teammates in the Watchtower that could cause bodily harm.
The were-feline groaned,
"This is a shot at me, I know it."
Kara said,
"Is this the time you put cooking grease on Flash's boots?"
Farrah responded,
"It gives a whole new meaning to the expression 'Greased Lightning'."
She burst out laughing. Donna rolled her eyes,
"I
always knew men were immature, but this?"
Kara shot her friend a
look,
"This is Farrah we're talking about, not Tora."
Booster Gold walked by, his face covered in banana cream. No doubt, a pie was thrown. He glared at Farrah,
"I know it was you. I can't prove it yet, but I'm going to get even."
He walked away, going to take a shower. Farrah shrugged,
"It could be worse."
Wonder Girl asked,
"How?"
"I could be helping Hawk get over his fear of cats."
Kara and Donna looked at each other and shuddered.
17) We don't kill super villains, no matter how badly they deserve it.
Kara smirked,
"Trying to kill Catman, Farrah?"
Persiana rolled her eyes,
"I
got on my knees, pleading for Superman to let me kill Catman. I even
offered to take my clothes off. I'd even make out with Donna if
it'll just get me one chance to strangle Catman's neck!"
Donna
looked at her, the Amazon's voice peppered with hope,
"You
would seriously get naked for me?"
Farrah shot her a glare, then
shook her head, crying,
"Why
won't they let me kill him? I want to in the worst possible
way!"
She covered her face with her hands. She then looked
through her fingers at the two stares she was getting. Farrah
stopped and said,
"You're
not buying it, are you?"
Supergirl shook her head,
"Nope."
The lioness shrugged,
"Neither did Superman."
18) The Watchtower computer is meant for business, not for personal pleasure.
Persiana rolled her eyes,
"This is Guy downloading porno, isn't it?"
Donna was disgusted,
"I do not know why Ice does not just leave him. That man is a chauvinistic pig! His antics would not be tolerated if it were ME being treated this way."
Kara smirked,
"I hear ya. Still, I think Ice keeps him on a short leash."
"Ow! I said I was sorry!"
"How
many times are you going to keep doing this?"
The three girls
turned and saw Ice slapping her boyfriend Guy Gardner upside the
head. She then dropped an ice cube in his pants and he ran around,
moving rather erratically, saying,
"That's
cold, Tora! Gimme a break!"
The women all laughed. Donna
smiled,
"On second thought, she is doing a good job."
19) Flash, no eating other people's food. The same goes for you, Persiana.
Farrah rolled her eyes,
"Like that's my fault Crimson Fox took a tuna sandwich. She should've known better."
Donna pinched the bridge of her nose,
"Sister,
it was on her tray. You already ate all the tuna sandwiches that
they made. For the day!"
The feline heroine shrugged,
"I was hungry. And don't tell me I'm the only one guilty of this. You took those cupcakes I liked."
The two friends were going to go to blows, but Kara stepped in,
"Ease off, ladies. Just remember, Flash started it."
The women all nodded on that.
20) Song and dance numbers are meant to be tasteful, not erotic or sexually explicit.
Persiana groaned,
"Come on, Supes! That was fun!"
Donna blinked,
"What was this one about? Did I miss something?"
Kara smirked,
"I only heard rumors, but I never thought it was true."
She looked at Farrah,
"Is it true you dressed up like a punk rocker school girl, singing Guns'n'Roses 'Anything Goes', and that you danced on the cafeteria tables?"
The feline nodded,
"Yep, I was trying to show Diana that she can't hide behind her Amazon heritage if she wanted to get a guy, so I just broke out in the song."
Supergirl placed her arms on her hips,
"Farrah, you grabbed Batman's butt, and rubbed up against him. I saw the tape."
Donna looked at her friend,
"Tape?"
Farrah nodded,
"Yeah, there's a tape."
She whined,
"Why can't Wonder Woman just once listen to one of my bright ideas about getting together with Batman?"
Kara smirked,
"She has something very important. It's called dignity."
The lioness shot her friend a withering glare and rolled her eyes,
"Whatever. At least I had a good time singing."
Kara snickered,
"Until
Ollie tried to stuff hundreds in your skirt."
Donna was shocked,
"That's outrageous."
Farrah shrugged,
"Not really. I only did the splits. Besides, with enough money, I can buy Di a whole new wardrobe of sexy clothes."
She snapped her fingers,
"That reminds me, I have to go."
She darted away, giggling madly. Kara shook her head,
"There she goes again, with whatever insane plot she has cooked up this time."
Donna looked at the blonde,
"Do you still have that tape of her dancing?"
The Kryptonian nodded,
"Yeah, it's online. I'll show ya."
End of One shot
(1) See Rules for the Watchtower
(2) Read Catnip Conundrum
(3) Catastrophe 4
(4) Read Taking in a Stray