A/N: I don't own Call the Midwife or any related characters, just my interpretation of what Delia may have written in that letter :) First time writing fan fiction, hope you enjoy :
Delia's Letter
My love,
As I write this, you lay sleeping softly beside me, undisturbed by my shaking hands and quiet sobbing. You are always beautiful, but this is when you steal my heart the most - as your red locks fall around your shoulders, framing your peaceful face - lips parted and your eyes twitching ever so slightly. I watch you often like this - the gentle rise and fall of your chest, the soft hum of your breathing, wondering what you are dreaming about and wishing that each sweet, stolen moment we share like this could last forever. As the clock ticks the seconds away to the morning, tonight, I wish it more than ever.
My brave, beautiful Patsy. How will I cope here without you? I know everybody here is lovely and that I will be well taken care of in every respect, but you will be gone. I will find myself reaching to entwine my fingers with yours and there will be nothing there to touch. There will be no soft lips waiting to kiss me goodnight. No sound of your voice whispering sweet nothings in my ear when everybody else has fallen asleep. Oh, Patsy. Tomorrow night there will just be an empty, cold bed where your warm body is supposed to lay. It seems so unnatural to be so far away from you. I know it is selfish of me to be feeling like this - but the thought of not seeing your smile, or those beautiful blue eyes of yours, is absolute torture. I will miss you more than anything - for without you, I am not whole; I am the sky without stars.
You are doing the right thing though, sweetheart, and you mustn't let my words discourage you. This decision has been hard on the both of us, and I have no doubt that you will be missing me equally as much in the days ahead, yet you must remember that I am so proud of you. Your kind and selfless spirit never ceases to amaze me. After everything you have been through already, and with everything you are yet to face, to go to your Father's side is an admirable and courageous thing for you to do. He needs you now more than ever. I know it won't be easy for you to allow yourself to feel - to cry - to fall apart. But, Darling, there is no weakness in any of these things. Open your heart to him in these last fleeting moments of his life. It may help bring you both peace, in the end.
Though heartache and tears will lay ahead of you, remember that you are never alone. I am by your side, holding your hand, each step of the way, if not in person than in spirit. We will meet in our dreams - in our hearts and in our thoughts - until we can meet and hold each other in the flesh once more. Write often, my love, whenever you can.
Remember that for every day we spend apart, to look up at the sky, and as you marvel at it's beauty know that somewhere out there, I am looking at it too, thinking of you and holding you close to my heart.
I love you. I will never stop loving you.
Always yours,
Delia xxx