I wrote this back in high school, and four years later I finally typed it up to post it. So here it is! Just a look into Netto's head during the scene in Axess 49 where he's absorbing the Dark Aura from DarkBlues.
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It's like a poison, it really is.
It consumes you, it takes you over.
It changes you, turns you against those you love.
The more I take in, the more I realize how much all of these are true. But it's for a good cause, despite the evil it emits. I'm doing this to forgive the sin I committed.
I had been willing to destroy my best friend.
Sure, I never went through with it, Enzan got in the way. The reason I'm in this situation: he destroyed his best friend. But I wanted to, I had made the decision.
I had been willing to destroy my best friend so we wouldn't die on that ship. It doesn't matter that Rockman was willing to sacrifice himself for us, it matters that I would have let him. I never wanted to, but I was going to, and that's what I'm guilty of.
So now, I'm making up for it.
As I steal the evil from DarkBlues, it entraps me, it encases my being.
Being held in Cross Fusion, I can feel Rockman trying to ease the burden. I hold him back; this time I'm not willing to condemn him.
"Netto!"
I've been told that my soul is pure light, surely a fitting assumption in regards to my name. I'm not sure I believe that. I can't be that pure if I had been willing to corrupt my best friend, my brother.
But I guess I'm pure enough, because as the Dark Aura rushes into me, it clashes with my uncorrupted soul. The pain is unimaginable, further punishment for my prior impure thoughts.
'Netto-kun!'
Once again, I feel Rockman reach out, and I push him back. The pain is becoming unbearable, and for a half a second, I consider letting him share the pain.
One more reason to punish myself.
As the pain amounts and the Dark Aura becomes more prominent, the Dark Aura suddenly stops surging into me. I open my eyes and as my feet hit the floor, I stagger to keep upright. My eyes widen at the scene before me.
Enzan leaps from the balcony, and Cross Fuses with DarkBlues.
Shimatta.
Cross Fusion completed, a devastating result stood before me. This was not R Blues, it was distorted-R DarkBlues. Enzan's influence had been almost completely overriden, but he had to be in there somewhere. I stepped forward.
Big mistake.
In a flash, R DarkBlues had a hand around my throat, squeezing the remaining life out of me. My eyes struggle to stay open, the DarkAura already weakening me earlier. I can feel R DarkBlues' body shaking through his grip, and I know Enzan is in there, fighting. I have to do something to help him.
I've absorbed Dark Aura before, after all. Enzan shouldn't have to deal with it, he has suffered enough from the Dark Aura.
I reach out my arm and grasp R DarkBlues' icon, and I start to absorb more Dark Aura. The more I take, the more R DarkBlues fights, and the more pressure is placed on my neck.
I just have to hold on until Enzan can win.
Black spots dot my vision, not from the presence of the Dark Aura, but from lack of oxygen. If Enzan doesn't win soon, I'm done for.
But why should I suffer? This is all Enzan's fault in the first place. Why should he win? Why not just let Enzan be taken over by DarkBlues and the Dark Aura? Better him than me, after all.
No! That's the Dark Aura talking. I won't give up on Enzan, or Blues!
But why not? I should be embracing the Dark Aura and its power, and so should he.
Stop it! No good can come from the Dark Aura. I can't let it corrupt me, or Enzan!
The Dark Aura isn't corrupting me, it's perfecting me.
How can this not be considered corruption? I'm carrying on a full, two-sided conversation with myself.
Well, I could fix that. All I have to do is give in to the Dark Aura.
And betray everyone I love and care for? No way. I can just as easily overcome it.
Can I really?
I can, and I will.
'Netto-kun, let me help you!'
No. This is my burden, my fight. I won't let the Dark Aura overcome me, and I'll help Enzan and Blues break free. And I will not let it touch Rockman, he doesn't deserve that; he never did.
That's it! Right after this is when Enzan breaks through and Blues is brought back.
For those of you following Life's Curse, Death's Gift...it's not abandoned, I promise, I just have a lot going on in life right now.
Thanks for reading!
Peace out!
Sadie