Enjolras watched his boyfriend grab his faded hazy blue backpack and run to the door before slamming it closed. They had had a fight again, but as much as Enjolras felt bad about their second break-up, he wasn't bothered by it for his own sake. Sure, Enjolras cared for the cynical drunkard - perhaps he even loved him - but it wasn't for the reasons most people loved each other.
The blond youth walked over to his desk and took out the half-written pamphlet which he needed to finish. As he moved his pen across the page in rough little motions, he tried to remember how this had happened. There was a time when he had hated - no, hate wasn't the right word. There were times when he had disliked Grantaire for his cynicism, his drunkenness, his lack of belief in anything, and his infuriating smirk.
But one day, Grantaire had walked up to Enjolras and sat by his table.
"It's late, Grantaire, shouldn't you be at home?" Enjolras asked without looking up from his work.
"so should you." Grantaire responded with a shrug.
"I'm working."
"You could work at home." Grantaire pointed out. Enjolras looked at him.
"I'm trying to concentrate on this essay so could you please stop interrupting me?" The blond requested and waited a moment to see if the words sank in before returning to his writing.
"Yeah, ok." Grantaire said a bit bitterly and stood up and took a gulp from his bottle.
Enjolras sighed in frustration and straightened. "Why do you drink that?"
Grantaire was taken aback. "It stops the pain." He answered truthfully. He was too surprised to think of a clever comeback. Enjolras was a little surprised by this comment.
"What's hurting you?" Enjolras asked suddenly interested. Grantaire took a step towards Enjolras and knelt by his chair.
"With all the good you do, you're blinded to my pain. You think I'm a drunk only out of habit, or a cynic out of choice?" Grantaire asked softly and carefully removed Enjolras' shoe and sock.
"What are you doing?" Enjolras asked and moved to take his foot back, but Grantaire bent towards the pale foot and kissed it softly. Enjolras froze and regarded Grantaire in confusion.
"I told you I believed in you and you scoffed. Maybe this will help you understand better - I love you." Grantaire said softly and looked up at Enjolras to see his reaction.
"You love me?" The blond asked, but his words didn't hold disgust or alarm - just surprise.
"You're Apollo and I only wish to be your Hyacinth." Grantaire explained. Something in the god seemed to change and he stood carefully so he wouldn't crush Grantaire's hand.
"you couldn't have started drinking because of me." Enjolras reasoned.
"No. I drink because I'm depressed, or maybe I'm depressed because I drink. I haven't figured out which. Chicken or the egg thing all over again. Anyway, I have major depression and sometimes it's just too much, so I drink to try and drown out the pain of feeling nothing. That's why I smoke too, and sometimes you hear rumors that I do drugs. They're all true. I do drugs to help me feel good again for a bit, but even more than all that, you're my drug. You wonder why I come to the meetings and that's why! Just being in the same room as you and to feel your energy and your passion, it helps me feel alive! I feel even more alive when your passion is directed at me and that's why I say things that make you mad - besides the fact that they're true. Every night I come home after a meeting, I drink more because you can't be with me. You hate me and you'd never choose me, but I need you." Grantaire rambled. His emotions were too built up for him to keep them back anymore.
Enjolras listened and saw Grantaire completely differently. No, Grantaire was not one of the people they were fighting to free, but he was still a human being who needed saving and maybe Enjolras could save him. Grantaire had said that he needed Enjolras and how could Enjolras refuse someone who begged for his help?
Enjolras knelt next to Grantaire and touched his face gently. "I don't hate you." He began and slowly kissed his cheek. "I have to study now, but do you want to meet me here to get a coffee tomorrow?" He offered.
They got coffee the neck day and Grantaire seemed a little happier. He smiled a bit now and then and Enjolras liked seeing him smile. He felt like he was making a difference. A couple days later, Enjolras realized that Grantaire would become miserable again when he wasn't with the cynic, so he decided to ask him out. Grantaire agreed and Enjolras started going home with Grantaire.
They didn't sleep together because Enjolras was asexual and he knew Grantaire was very not. Enjolras slept on the couch and Grantaire slept in his own bed. Grantaire seemed a bit brighter, but not as bright as Enjolras would like him to be.
Enjolras was studying on Grantaire's couch, but he heard weird noises coming from the dark haired man's room. The blond stood and walked over to the door and contemplated knocking, but decided to just open the door. He saw that Grantaire was masterbating and suddenly regretted not knocking.
"Enjolras!" Grantaire jumped a bit and stopped what he had been doing. Enjolras walked over to him and climbed onto the bed.
"Would you like some help?" Enjolras offered and touched Grantaire's thigh gently. Grantaire gasped and cupped the back of Enjolras's neck. Enjolras didn't protest and watched as Grantaire's face gravitated towards his own. Their lips came together and they kissed gently at first, but it quickly grew desperate and heated on Grantaire's part and Enjolras didn't protest. He kept up with Grantaire and allowed the man to push him down and straddle him. He let Grantaire unbutton his shirt and caress his chest before reaching for the blond's belt.
The next morning, Enjolras opened his eyes and saw Grantaire staring at him with an unbelieving smile as if he couldn't imagine the god was lying naked in his bed with him.
Enjolras was asexual, but he knew Grantaire needed him and so he allowed it. Almost any sacrifice was worth making for the benefit of others. Besides, Enjolras wasn't completely against sex, but he had no interest in it either.
Enjolras pecked Grantaire's lips and said, "good morning." Before looking at the clock and saying, "I have to get to class." And standing up.
Enjolras sighed and rubbed his eyes. It was almost 3 AM now and he should really get some sleep. Combeferre wouldn't be very impressed if he found out.
"I'll just finish this one thought." Enjolras muttered and did as he said. Once he had finished, he put the pen down and stripped before climbing into bed. It was his bed. A month or so into their relationship, Enjolras had suggested they move to his apartment since it was bigger and nicer. Now Enjolras was lying alone in his bed which he hadn't done for a while now.
Still, it didn't bother him personally. He didn't need Grantaire. He was content to be alone with his cause. The only reason he had been with Grantaire in the first place was for Grantaire's sake.