Scenes from God of War II That didn't make the cut

by micman60

Awesome scenes from God of War II that should have made the cut. M for references of the sexual kind, bleeped out swearing and drug abuse. Warning: this story is not very good - I wrote it when I was 14.

1. Chapter 1

SCENES FROM GOD OF WAR II THAT DIDNT MAKE THE CUT

by micman60

AN: I thought it was about time I fixed up all my chapters for your reading pleasure. I've corrected all my spelling and grammar mistakes. Enjoy.

Chapter 1

SETTING: Hades

Kratos (smoking pot): S- so Hades, What is this stuff called again?

Hades (also smoking pot): It's weed, man. jeez, you need to get more friends.

Kratos: You need to get more pot, we smoked it all.

Hades: (giggles) dude, YOU smoked it all. Go get some more from my secret greenhouse.

(5 HOURS LATER)

Setting: Hades' secret greenhouse

Hades (normal): (Storming in) Where the hell are you, Kratos? I... (Gasps)

(Kratos is naked in the middle of several thousand empty plant pots, asleep. Suddenly he wakes up. He is obviously stoned out of his mind)

Kratos: (Giggles) This is some high quality *BLEEP* man! I'll take a dozen!

Hades: YOU SMOKED ALL MY *BLEEP*ING POT!

Kratos: No, I smoked the tall one in the middle of the room.

Hades: NOT CONCHY!

Kratos: o_o

Hades: Uhh... I mean... Then who smoked the rest of my weed?

(Zeus wakes up from behind a few empty plant pots naked, also obviously stoned)

Zeus: (Giggles) This is some high quality *BLEEP* bro! I'll take a dozen.

Hades: HOLY *BLEEP*! Why did you smoke all my weed, Zeus?

Zeus: I found Kratos here and we had a few thousand kegs. then we smoked cones from the tall plant in the middle of the room.

Hades: THEN WHO THE *BLEEP* SMOKED ALL MY *BLEEP*ING POT!

(Suddenly Athena wakes up naked next to Kratos)

Athena: Jeez, Kratos! You sure know how to wield your godly powers! (giggles)

Hades: *BLEEP*ING HADES! WHY DIDN'T YOU SMOKE ZEUS' POT?

Kratos: Yours was nearer.

(Suddenly Persephone wakes up on the other side of Kratos)

Hades: PERSEPHONE? DID YOU AND THAT *BLEEP*HOLE *BLEEP* IN MY *BLEEP*ING SECRET GREENHOUSE?

Persephone: That *BLEEP*hole and Athena, Actually.

Zeus: Athena? I thought we had something special (cries)

Athena: That time with Mom didn't mean anything, Father.

Hades: WHAT. THE. *BLEEP*.

Zeus: (ignoring Hades) Don't forget those times when you were asleep.

Everyone else: O_O

Zeus: Oops.

Kratos: At least your father actually loved you (giggles)

Athena: He's your father too!

Kratos: But that means... I slept with my sister AND my uncles wife? OH GODS THIS IS GETTING MESSED UP

Hades: IT GOT MESSED UP WHEN YOU *BLEEP*ING *BLEEP*HEADS SMOKED ALL OF MY *BLEEP*ING POT!

Kratos: Not all. (Pulls out several thousand bags of weed)

All: HOORAY FOR KRATOS!

(2 HOURS LATER)

Hades (High Again): So, so you're tellin' me Persephone has a *BLEEP* AND a *BLEEP*?

Zeus, Kratos and Athena: Yep.

Hades: ...PERSPHOOOOOOOO-

End

AN: While I was here, I changed a few lines too. I think it's very much better then the old version. Would you agree?