"First Lt. Shepard?"

"Come in please. Report First Lt."

"What is your sitrep"

They were all gone. Gone. Shepard looked around, assessing the damage. She continued to ignore the orders and requests coming over her omnitool. There was just so much blood, it didn't look real. Was it hers? Was it theirs? Had she fallen asleep? No, this was definitely real, she thought to herself, seeing the dead thresher maw next to the mangled vehicle, the smell of charred flesh singed her nostrils. Slowly the memories came back.

"Is anyone there?

"Fuck, Shepard?"

She left the comm on, still unable to answer it, she pursed her lips, her chin just barely wobbled. It's all was my fault, should have noticed it was a trap. Fuck. They're all dead. Shepard fell down to her knees, and just lied down on the bloody dirt, next to her comrades, on her side she could see the faces of her dead crew staring back at her. She closed her eyes, and didn't mind if she never opened them again, she saw Operations Chief Gregory Yousefi handing her a datapad on the mission. Seemed so easy, marines went missing on Akuze, go see what happened. Of course it wasn't easy, they wouldn't have sent Shepard, that's why they sent her, they always sent her, impossible mission? Send Shepard. Shepard didn't believe in no win scenarios, she always got the job done, and did it well and with an attitude. Why was this time any different, she got the job done, damned the consequences. Shepard groaned, and tried to roll over, with a yelp she succeeded in flopping onto her back, her eyes darting open.

She saw a fireball from the sky, was it a meteorite? No, meteorites don't have wheels and rocket thrusters, it was an M29 Grizzly. Shepard started to feel cold, she looked down. She didn't even feel it this whole time but she was bleeding out, a seemingly small puncture in her left thigh. That maw had the last laugh, Shepard began to find it funny, and started laughing. Her laughter rose until she lost her mind, it was the only thing she could do, her laughter turned to sobbing. Things began to darken around the edges of Shepard's vision, she guessed she wasn't coming back this time. Accepting her fate, she closed her eyes and curled into a ball.

Shepard didn't hear the tires of the M29 Grizzly right by her head. She was too exhausted and weak from blood loss. "No life signs here Commander"

"I'm not finding anything here, they're all gone here too"

"No life-wait-I'm picking up a faint trace." "It's the First Lieutenant!"

Commander Lindsay knelt down and turned Shepard over. "First Lt. report, come on Shepard, speak to me!"

Shepard smiled weakly, "Mission accomplished Sir"

"Shepard, no, Shepard come...b...ac...k"

"Don't you die, not today. That's an order!"

Shepard fell back into unconsciousness.

When she woke again she was in a med-bay, she couldn't figure out which ship she was on, it wasn't the SSV Manilla. A sharp pain radiated from the back of her head, she reached to her implant, an L2 in dire need of replacement, potential brain damage be damned. She swung her legs off the bed, and attempted to stand. Shepard severely misjudged her weakness, not knowing just how dire her injuries were and fell to the floor, bringing a tray of implements down. An alliance nurse came running into the med-bay, "No, no don't get up, here let me help you."

"No! Fuck off, don't help me. I can do this on my own." Shepard was even surprised at her own attitude, surprisingly the nurse seemed un-phased, "Before I...fuck off let's get you back into bed...alright?"

"Fine."

The nurse helped Shepard back into her bed, and asked if she needed anything. "No, I'm fine, I guess. I just wanted to, I wanted..." Shepard couldn't speak lest she began to cry, still the memories kept flooding her in waves. Taking a deep breath she tried again, "I just wanted to see where I was."

The nurse nodded, "You're on the SSV Vancouver, they had more...state of the art facilities to treat you."

Shepard nodded, she knew what she meant. "There's a visitor here for you, he's been waiting for you to wake up."

"How long..how long was I out?"

The nurse paused, "About 2 weeks."

Shepard's eyes widened, "2..."

"Yes 2 weeks, Earth standard time."

Shepard became overwhelmed with that news that she didn't see Commander Lindsay come in. He saluted to Shepard, which caused Shepard to cry. "Fuck, I don't want you to see me like this." She couldn't help it, everything was still so much a shock. "Hey there trooper, it's okay." Shepard found it odd that her commander had softened, and spoke to her in this manner. "I'm sorry sir, I failed, I let everyone die."

"No, there's no way you could have known, nothing you did could have saved those soldiers."

"You don't know that." Shepard flopped her head back down, letting out a sound of frustration, "I'm alive, I'm the only one who made it to the LZ. Why me? I'm not better than anyone else."

Lindsay shrugged, "You don't have to be better, or smarter, or anything. Sometimes we just survive and have to move on."

Shepard placed her hands over her face, "I don't know, I keep thinking about everything I could have done better. If I could just replay it all, maybe no one would die."

"Well there's a thought, if anyone invents time travel, you'll be the first to know."

"Shepard, the Alliance is proud of you. I wanted to give you some good news."

Throwing her hands to her sides, she turned her head to her commander, "What could possibly be good news to me, right now?"

Lindsay chortled, "We all know that the Alliance has impeccable tact, but certain people watching have recommended you for the N7 program."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously." Lindsay replied

Shepard rolled her eyes, and blew a stray strand of copper hair out of her eyes, "I get 50 marines killed, and roast a thresher maw, and the Alliance wants to...promote me?"

"At least think about it, alright?"

Shepard rolled over, turning away from her commander, "Yeah...I'll think about it."