Some forest, the day after the Winter Solstice in The Titan's Curse.
It was dusk and Lucia was near the front of the Hunters as they jogged through the woods. She normally preferred to be at the back of the group where she could easily observe everyone else rather than the other way around, but, today, she found herself only a couple steps behind the goddess and their new lieutenant.
"We will set up camp here for tonight," Lady Artemis said as she came to a halt. "Thalia, Demetria will show you how it is done. Lucia and I will scout the area."
Lucia couldn't help but narrow her eyes ever so slightly. It was not exactly common for the goddess to scout with her Hunters, but it was even more uncommon for her to scout with only one of them, as it was usually - from Lucia's experience - a sign that she wanted to discuss something privately.
"I could scout with Lucia, my lady, if you would rather rest," Melissa offered. Lucia was not sure if Melissa was trying to prevent the inevitable private conversation or if she was simply looking out for their mistress's well-being. Knowing Melissa, both seemed plausible.
"I haven't been in my domain for a week, Melissa," Artemis said with a sigh. "I would like to enjoy it a tad bit longer. And you all look exhausted."
"As you wish, my lady," Melissa said.
"Do you mind accompanying me, Lucia?" Artemis asked, seeming to remember that she had not asked for Lucia's opinion on this.
"Not at all, my lady," Lucia said, but she could not stop herself from putting a slight edge to her voice. Her eyes met Artemis's for a moment and she was not quite sure what she saw in them - perhaps, a hint of gratefulness that another excuse to speak with her was not necessary.
It was the goddess who broke eye contact. She turned to Thalia. "We ought to return within an hour."
"Right," Thalia said. She was rather nervous-looking, Lucia noted with some satisfaction.
"Come, Lucia," Artemis said and Lucia followed her out of the glade.
As they wandered further and further from the other Hunters, Lucia kept quiet. She barely realized how tightly she was clenching her jaw.
It was a few minutes later, that Artemis gestured for Lucia to stop. Lucia obeyed, as she always did.
"You are angry with me," Artemis said.
It was clearly not a question. It was an accusation, more or less, and Lucia wanted to deny it - she truly did - but she knew she would not. She wished she could deny it. She did not want to be mad at the goddess. However, she had not been able to stop an irrational rage from building up in the back of her mind.
"Is it that obvious?" Lucia asked, feeling ashamed.
"I do not believe the others have noticed," Artemis said. "In fact, I would not have noticed it, either, if it were not for some of those glares you gave me. If looks could kill and I were not immortal, I would certainly have died a few hours ago."
Lucia sighed. "Forgive me, mistress."
"No," Artemis said.
Lucia blinked. No? She knew Artemis was prone to holding grudges, but that usually did not apply to her Hunters.
"Not yet," Artemis clarified, as an afterthought. "Tell me: what did I do to offend you?"
Lucia felt the familiar tug of her curse at the command and another flare of anger rose in her chest. The goddess generally avoided giving Lucia direct commands because she didn't want Lucia to be forced to obey her if she was unwilling to do so: it was no secret that Lucia hated the curse of obedience which the gods had cast on her nearly two thousand years ago. The fact that the goddess chose that moment to either forget about her curse or to purposefully give her that order regardless made her even more irate.
"Thalia," Lucia said through grit teeth as if it explained everything. "Why is she your lieutenant? I would have thought Demetria was the obvious choice. Everyone listens to her; she's smart; she's our best archer. Or, perhaps, Phoebe. I mean, she is impulsive, but she's a great tracker and healer. And if not her, then - " Lucia stopped, realizing her last few sentences had not been demanded by her curse. She did not need to continue and she did not want to be so impudent as to finish that last sentence.
The goddess's silver eyes studied her. "You wanted to be lieutenant."
Lucia hesitated, but she knew no amount of hesitation could bring her to lie. "Yes."
"I see."
"I - I thought I had a good chance," Lucia found herself saying. "I have been in the Hunt for centuries. I have never given you reason to question my loyalty. I have done everything you asked me to do."
"And therein lies part of why you cannot be my lieutenant." Artemis paused. "You are obedient to a fault."
"But, Artemis - "
"I need a lieutenant who would question my decisions. I will not deny that I am reckless at times, Lucia. Someone must ensure that I see reason during those times," Artemis said.
"I could do it," Lucia insisted.
"I have no doubt that you would," Artemis said, "but if I told you to drop the matter, you would drop it, even if you were in the right and I in the wrong. You wouldn't have a choice."
"That's hardly my fault!" Lucia protested. Her mistress was not being fair about this.
"I never said it was," Artemis said, gently. "Alas, we are where we are."
Lucia huffed, her anger redirecting at the rest of the Olympian Council.
"And, as for another matter, you are gone from the Hunt even more than I am," the goddess continued. "It would not be practical for you to be responsible for my Hunters when chances are that we would both be away."
"If I could choose to stay, I would," Lucia muttered, glancing at the sky through the branches. "It's my bloody curse's fault that I can't ignore summons from the gods."
"I know you hate it, but life with it cannot possibly be worse than eternity in Asphodel for a child of Pluto," Artemis said.
"Indeed," Lucia agreed with a sigh. Her father's name - his Roman name, the one she was naturally accustomed to - helped calm her. She struggled for a moment to decide her next words. "I... I apologize for being mad at you. I do not like your reasoning, my lady, but I understand it."
"It's alright, my dear," the goddess said. "but try to remember that I trust you. Your loyalty has been tested far more than any of my other Hunters'. You have been tempted more than any of them. And, yet, here you are."
Lucia knew Artemis's words were meant to be comforting, but they made her feel worse. She had fallen in love more than once while running errands for the gods, a fact of which the goddess was well aware.
"You have always chosen to honor your pledge to me rather than pursue your desires. It is a sacrifice I respect. I do not think I would have been able to do the same thing if I were you."
At those words, Lucia suddenly recalled a conversation from her second year in the Hunt. A conversation nearly two thousand years old that now echoed in her mind.
"I have enough. I truly do," Lucia said to Artemis as they watched a battle from the safety of the trees.
The rest of the Hunters were scouting the forest, looking for a decent place to set up camp. The goddess seemed to have noticed that Lucia needed to talk and had requested that she observe the battle between the Romans and Celts with her.
"I understand how you feel," Artemis said, keep her silver eyes on the fighting legions.
"No, you do not," Lucia said, sighing.
Artemis looked at Lucia out of the corner of her eye.
Lucia was not sure if her mistress's look was meant to be a warning or an invitation to continue speaking, but, regardless, Lucia bowed her head dejectedly. She was tired of everything she had been through in the past few years.
"Go on," Artemis said.
"You know I never truly wanted immortality," Lucia muttered, not able to disregard the order because of her damned curse. "I was too old to join... I hate that I cannot stop myself from thinking of romance when I come across men. I hate that I am practically a slave to the gods. I hate doing their bidding constantly. I never thought this would become my life... You do not understand; you cannot understand! You may look human and you may act human, but you're a goddess. You know nothing of my pathetic mortal life."
Lucia bit her lip nervously after she finished. She should not have said that; she really should not have said that, but she was too stunned by her own outburst to apologize. It was generally not her nature to speak so boldly; later, once she had regained her senses, she would explain it to herself as a side-effect of her curse.
When Artemis turned to look at Lucia directly, Lucia lowered her eyes. If she had said anything of this sort to her father, she would be dearly regretting it by now.
"And you do not seem to trust me," the goddess said coolly. "I have very human emotions. I know what it is like to be your age."
Lucia somewhat doubted this, but she did not reply.
"There was a time when I would appear in the form of a girl your age," Artemis continued, presumably aware of Lucia's doubt. "I wanted it to be clear that I was not a child..." She hesitated. "What do you know of Orion?"
"The constellation?" Lucia asked, her eyebrows coming together.
"Yes."
"He... was a hunter, was he not? In the old days," Lucia said, uncertainly. What did a long dead hero have to do with anything? "A very skilled hunter. A son of Neptune, er, Poseidon, I think. He was killed by a scorpion."
"Correct on all accounts, but one," Artemis said, looking back at the battle. "My brother started the rumor of the scorpion."
"What actually happened?"
"I met Orion while hunting alone one day," the goddess began, her eyes focused on some distant spot. "He was... witty. Honorable. Respectful. Handsome. Always a gentleman, albeit somewhat arrogant. And he was an excellent hunter. Far more skilled than I had ever thought a mortal man could be."
Lucia quite suddenly realized where this story was going and she was not at all sure how she felt about it.
"I fell in love with him, Lucia," Artemis said bluntly. "I will not deny it. When Apollo found out, he believed I was tempted to break my oath. He thought he ought to be responsible and ensure the removal of my temptation." She paused. "Apollo and I were at the seashore one day. He pointed at a speck in the water far out in the sea and challenged me to hit it. I accepted the challenge... Imagine how I felt when the son of Poseidon washed ashore with my arrow in his head. I had killed him without even knowing it. I do not know what would have happened if he had lived, but it matters not. My point is that I understand your struggle."
The memory had washed over her in the blink of an eye and she had a funny feeling that her mistress was thinking of that day, as well. The story of Orion was well-known amongst the Hunters, though no ever seemed to speak of him; new members would always somehow be filled in on the story (usually in the softest of whispers during midday while they were anywhere but in the wilderness when the goddess was not present), but Lucia was one of the few who heard the story firsthand from their mistress and knew the full truth of it. Gaea had been incredibly cruel by forming a giant in Orion's likeness to torment the goddess sometime after his death and the giant, to that day, still hunted the Hunters to avenge his namesake.
"You are one of my closest friends, Lucia," Artemis said simply. "The closest, as of recent events. Do not forget that."
"And you mine," Lucia said. With Zoë dead, Lucia was indeed the next Hunter who knew the goddess best and vice versa. There were, of course, Hunters older than Lucia, but she was the one who had somehow found herself forming a trio with Zoë and Artemis. "And... do forgive me for not dropping this, but why Thalia?"
"Why not her?" Exasperation leaked into goddess' voice.
"She's new," Lucia couldn't stop herself from saying; she couldn't stop remnants of her anger from returning to the surface. "She didn't join for the right reasons."
"You did not join for the right reasons, either," Artemis pointed out.
"Yes, but..." Lucia paused, feeling guilty. "I wasn't avoiding a prophecy," Lucia said in her own defense. "If Perseus Jackson is the child of the prophecy, then it will be fulfilled within two years. Thalia won't fear it anymore."
Artemis shrugged. "I think you should get to know her. You have more in common than you think."
"Artemis, she has friends. Mortal friends," Lucia pressed on. "She will regret not growing old with them."
"That is enough," Artemis stated, calmly. "Do you truly believe that I did not consider all that you have said?"
Lucia decided to stay silent at that point.
"I expect you not to be childish about this," Artemis said, even more seriously then. "Thalia should not have to be subject to antagonism from you."
"Yes, my lady..." Lucia replied, returning to formalities. The time to be bluntly honest seemed over. "I won't - you know I won't intentionally cause her any discomfort."
"I know," the goddess agreed. "I only wanted to be clear on the matter." Then she smiled reassuringly. "And I do forgive you."
Lucia inclined her head in thanks. "I just need some time. And shouldn't we actually scout, like you said?"
Artemis groaned, her seriousness disappearing entirely. Lucia - even after so many years in the Hunt - couldn't believe how mortal-like she looked at such moments.
"Well... We do not have to," Artemis decided. "I am more tired than I would care to admit and, besides, if there was anything dangerous nearby, I would sense it."
"But if it was truly dangerous, would it not be able to avoid being sensed?" Lucia asked.
The goddess looked about to dismiss what Lucia had said, but instead sighed. "Fair point."
Lucia grinned triumphantly. She wasn't feeling up to scouting, but it was the responsible thing to do and she enjoyed being right.
"If you go around on the east and I the west," Lucia began. "We could meet north of camp and return together."
"Actually," Artemis began, as she started the way east. "I think it would be best for you to come with me. There is another matter we must discuss."
"I don't have to go again already, do I?" Lucia asked, falling into step beside the goddess, but feeling about ready to cry if her presence had indeed been demanded by another god. She wanted - she needed - to stay with her sisters for a while. She wouldn't be able to stand being away from them now.
"No, nothing of the sort. I..." Artemis trailed off. She sighed. Her mouth moved to form words, but she seemed unable to decide what to say.
Lucia pretended to be very interested in some distant trees so that the goddess wouldn't feel awkward. But, when even after a while, she had still not said anything, Lucia looked back at her.
"My lady?"
Artemis kept her eyes on their surroundings for a moment before returning Lucia's gaze and saying, "I was wondering...what did Zoë tell you?"
Lucia shifted uncomfortably. Long ago, back when Lucia had witnessed a Hunter die for the first time (it had been a young daughter of Athena named Sophia who had been in the Hunt for several centuries before Lucia joined), Artemis had warned her against conversing with dead Hunters. She had said that communicating with their spirits would only make it harder to accept their death. Lucia had taken that warning to heart and only spoke to her deceased sisters when they sought her out or if one of her living ones desperately need her to pass on a message.
Zoë's spirit was the only one Lucia had ever intentionally come across by her own will. Lucia wasn't sure how Artemis already knew that she had spent the previous night in the Underworld with their dear lieutenant, but she felt guilty for not telling the goddess herself.
"Oh, um," Lucia said. "She told me about the quest: went went wrong, what went right. About Thalia and Jackson and the satyr and Bianca."
Artemis frowned. "I wish Bianca had not perished so soon. I had not even gotten to know her."
"Neither had I," Lucia said, sadly. "...but she'll be fine in the Underworld. Lord Hades will see to it."
"Indeed..."
There was a moment of silence.
"And," Lucia said, after a while. "Zoë sends her love. I was going to say it during supper with everyone there."
The goddess forced a smile. "That is a good idea. She is in Elysium, correct?"
"Of course," Lucia said, nodding. She had witnessed Zoë's judgement. Perhaps, the judges had been intimidated by her presence, knowing that she would petition her father if they did not send her friend to Elysium, but Lucia supposed it didn't really matter. "Minos tried to give her a hard time for betraying her father and the other Hesperides, but Jefferson convinced him she wasn't the backstabbing type, given her millennia long service to you. Then they talked about all the good things she had done. It wouldn't have been just for her to go anywhere but Elysium."
"I should think so," Artemis agreed. She paused. "Do you intend to speak with her again?"
"Would it be wise, my lady?" Lucia asked. "I do not wish to cause anyone any hurt."
The goddess's silver eyes shone with indecision as she picked her way through the trees carefully, avoiding stepping on dry leaves that could crunch underfoot.
Lucia followed her, also stepping with caution.
After a while, Artemis looked at Lucia, asking, "Did your father tell you to return to the Underworld?"
"No," Lucia said, shaking her head.
"Then, I advise you not to speak with Zoë unless you are there for other reasons. If you happen to be in the Underworld, feel free to talk to her," Artemis said. "If not... I think it would be best for us all to move forward."
Lucia nodded slowly. "Understood."
"We ought to start heading northwest," Artemis said, turning slightly to her left.
Lucia glanced around and her directional senses as a Hunter confirmed that the goddess was right. She followed her.
"My lady," Lucia began. Then she hesitated. Her mistress had said she wanted them all to move forward; that must have included herself. Perhaps, Lucia's idea wouldn't be welcome.
"Yes?"
"I know my father rarely ever lets other gods into his domain, much less into Elysium itself," Lucia said, deciding she couldn't really back out at this point. She wanted to help. "If you ever want to talk to Zoë, I can summon her for a while. It would take some preparation, but I'd be able to do it. If you want."
Artemis looked at her. Silver light momentarily flickered across her skin. But then she inhaled deeply. "Zoë is not my first Hunter or friend to die."
"But she's your first lieutenant to die," Lucia said. The silver light had confirmed that the goddess was indeed struggling with the loss of her best friend, not just another one of her Hunters. "I know it's hurting you more than any other death, more than you're letting on - "
"Lucia," Artemis interrupted, sighing.
"Forgive me, my lady. It's not my place - "
"Indeed, it's not," Artemis said. "If I were any other Olympian..."
It was hardly a threat, but Lucia fell silent and bowed her head. She had pushed her mistress's patience enough for the time being.
"However, you are...right," Artemis continued, glancing back at Lucia. "Thank you, dear. Truly. But I will not have you bend the rules of death on my account."
Lucia wanted to retort that it was her birthright to summon spirits and the like, but she held her tongue. She found that she admired the goddess's insistence on letting the dead stay dead. Lucia knew from both experience and observation that was the best way to deal with loss. Dwelling on the dead wouldn't bring them back to life; it was best to let them go. However, she strongly approved of getting to say a final goodbye and resolving any remaining issues, but if Lady Artemis was certain...
"As you wish, mistress," Lucia said.
They were silent for a while as they continued to walk a perimeter around their campsite.
After a while, Lucia stopped. "I'm sorry."
"What for?" Artemis turned to look at Lucia quizzically and halted, as well.
"Everything," Lucia said. "I've been much too outspoken today."
"Indeed, it is most unlike you. Have you been drinking?" Artemis asked with a teasing smile, evidently trying to steer their conversation away from less-than-enjoyable topics.
Lucia snorted. "Of course not."
"Well, in any case, you do have the right to speak your mind," Artemis said. "I may not always like what you say, but you - generally - do have valid points."
Lucia forced a smile, but her heart wasn't in it and it disappeared after a mere second. "I shared Zoë's dream of your - your kidnapping. I failed you. I should've done something. If I had - I mean, I did try, but my father intercepted me when I was shadow traveling and stopped me - but if I had done something - "
"There was nothing you could have done to prevent her death," the goddess interjected.
"I could have taken her part of the prophecy. I could have died."
"Your father wouldn't have killed you."
"I could have asked him to."
"He wouldn't," Artemis insisted. "The Fates clearly have more plans for you. Zoë... Zoë had fulfilled her purpose. She was tired."
Lucia sighed. "I know. She told me the same thing, but what's the point of me being nearly a god myself, of having so much ichor in my blood, if I'm not permitted to make a difference in anything?"
"You make a great difference. The gods - Zeus knows they'll never admit it - but they do appreciate your service," Artemis said. "You've done much for Olympus."
"I don't know..."
There was a distant grumble of thunder.
Lucia glanced up at the treetops, trying to catch a glimpse of the sky.
"See?" Artemis said. "Lord Zeus agrees."
Lucia nodded grudgingly, with her gaze still upward. "Thank you, uncle."
She could feel Artemis watching her, but she didn't meet her eyes. Instead, she looked in the direction they had been heading in. "We should probably keep going. Thalia's going to get worried soon."
"Most likely," Artemis agreed.
To Lucia's surprise, the goddess stepped forward and hugged her briefly.
"Come on, then," Artemis said, pulling away.
Once again, she began to lead the way through the trees and Lucia followed, this time speaking of the next monster they planned to hunt.