Another glass was hurriedly drained, its contents burning its way down his throat, and yet he still did not feel better. He doubted he ever would as he thought of last night's events. Oliver had tried to get John to leave Team Arrow.
Oliver was annoyed but not surprised when John fought back with his own arguments "you would be dead ten times over if it wasn't for me!" John shouted in his face and began listing all the times that he had stitched him up and helped him walk or run back to the Lair to heal.
"I know and I thank you for what you have done for our cause and all your help to me but I can't have you in the field anymore John! You have Lyla now not to mention your daughter!"
That struck a nerve.
Punches were thrown, various hurtful words and phrases were said from both Oliver and John until they finally reached a standstill. Oliver pushed John towards the door and told him one final time to leave, he watched as John gathered himself and stood as tall as he could "you can't do this alone"
"I started out alone John, it wasn't that difficult" Oliver shot back "go home to your family"
John left but not before knocking over a table with some arrows on it "you're a fucking idiot!" he roared as he slammed the door behind him.
Oliver filled his glass and drained it again. Telling John that he didn't need him anymore on the team hurt him, it left a horrible taste in his mouth and an empty hole in his stomach. Oliver knew it would go away with time, and possibly more alcohol, but he was dreading what he had to do next and no amount of alcohol would help. Oliver grabbed his phone and dialled the number it had taken only a matter of days to memorize and spoke into the phone "I need you here…we need to track down another member of the Red Gang…yes…please I need you here right now…thank you"
Oliver sat and waited, he knew they would be here soon and already started to hate himself more than ever.
Felicity showed up thirty minutes later and entered the Lair, her heels making little click click click noises on the ground. Oliver was going to miss that.
"Hey Oliver" her happy voice hit him like a freight train yet he forced himself to return her greeting yet he did not tur to face her "if you want me to run a search you're going to need to get out of my chair" Felicity joked as Oliver stood up, it was then that she noticed the half empty bottle of alcohol next to him.
"Oliver" Felicity eyed the bottle before looking to Oliver again "is everything Okay?" she asked quietly
"It will be soon after this business is taken care of" his voice was soft yet had an edge of sorrow to it that Felicity didn't pick up on yet
"Right. Because tomorrow we need to start on finding you a job!" Felicity excitedly clapped her hands like some happy child "so that we can then get QC back"
Oliver turned to her now, he loved that she used 'we' it reminded him of her words that he was not alone and that she believed in him. Right now though his eyes were dark and portrayed the total opposite of how she made him feel – they showed darkness, anger and hurt. Oliver stepped away from the computers now before speaking "I don't need you to do that Felicity"
Felicity was getting worried now she had never seen Oliver like this "well yes you probably want to look for jobs on your own after all I don't know what you want and there are other things I could do"
"No there aren't" Oliver could feel his heart splintering
"What?" Felicity walked towards the computers and turned them on "of course there are other things I can do Oliver! Run searches, facial recognitions for the Red Gang and there is more to do now that Dig has his little girl to look after" Felicity's eyes sparkled
"No Felicity, there is nothing more for you to do" Oliver stalked toward her
"What are you talking about?" Felicity turned to him and jumped when she found that he was nearly nose to nose with her invading her personal space so much that she was forced to lean back on the desk "Oliver? What's up with you?" she slid out and away from him, Oliver's eyes never leaving hers "You're starting to scare me"
Good Oliver thought "There is nothing for you to do now" he repeated and then ignored the bile rising in his throat as he felt his heart splintering even more "You. Are. Done here" he motioned to the whole Lair "I don't need you anymore"
Felicity looked like se had been slapped in the face, tears welled up in her eyes but they still refused to fall as she tried to make sense of what was happening "I…what? No! Oliver you still need me!"
"I don't need you and I don't want your help anymore" for this to work Oliver decided that he was going to have to try harder, he reached for a sledge hammer over by the medical bay and walked back to the computers. Oliver watched as Felicity's eye grew wide in disbelief as he raised it high and then brought it down on the computer screen shattering it into pieces.
Felicity's scream echoed throughout the Lair as he smashed one screen after the other "OLIVER?! STOP PLEASE STOP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
Oliver ignored her as the last screen smashed to the ground at his feet, the ground littered with varying sizes of the screens, Felicity was panting like she had run a marathon, her knees were shaking from the shock so much that she had to grab her chair to keep from falling "Oliver, what are you doing?"
"You don't have a reason to come back" Oliver put the hammer down on the desk and looked as Felicity still tried to hold herself together "leave" he pointed harshly to the door
"No" she shook her head "whatever this is" she gestured to Oliver "I told you that you are not alone and I'm here for you and so is Digg and Roy! We'll help you Oliver" she started to stop closer to the table avoiding the broken screens and bent down to where all the hard drives were "now we need some new screens!"
Oliver smacked the drives out of her hands and with his hammer he smashed them too "OLIVER STOP!" He knew that all of their passed work was on them and if they were gone then Felicity would have no excuse to come back. Felicity slowly stood up still holding a broken hard drive in her hands "Why are you doing this Oliver? What did I do?" Tears started to fall as Oliver simply stared back at her with his cold eyes "if it was something I did, Oliver, I'm so sorry I…I only want to help you"
Oliver hated himself right now but this was necessary, he was doing this to keep her safe, one final blow and he knew she would leave him. Oliver grabbed her by the arms and held her close, using his body and height to intimidate her and his voice to drive everything home "You aren't listening to me" his voice now rose into a dangerous roar "FELICITY! I DON'T NEED YOU! I DON'T WANT YOUR HELP!" He started shaking her roughly digging his hands into her so hard he knew she would have bruises "LEAVE! LEAVE NOW! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!" Oliver stopped shaking her, Felicity was crying now, tears fell from her eyes as she looked up at Oliver
"N-n-no Oliver. I don't accept that"
How is she still fighting this?! "Felicity" Oliver closed his eyes and then pushed Felicity to the ground "I WON'T ASK YOU AGAIN!" he watched as Felicity stood up again her body language telling him that she was terrified right now. Oliver hated himself more than ever but that light in her eyes, that light that saved him, made him see that there were better things in life was still there. Her love. Oliver hated seeing it even after what he had just done, he needed to extinguish it.
Oliver came forward and gripped her tightly again "O-O-Oliver…?" her words were cut short
"I don't love you" Oliver saw the light getting smaller and smaller "now GET OUT!"
Felicity started to sob now, uncontrollable shakes and sobs racked through her body as Oliver pushed her away, the exact opposite of what he wanted to do, and watched her walk towards the door. One last time, she turned and looked at Oliver silently asking, begging for him to tell her what was wrong but he just stood there.
When Felicity shut the door Oliver collapsed to the ground in a heap. His heart finally breaking into a million pieces. He hated himself for breaking her, he broke her and he had no idea how she would pull herself back together, she would he hoped.
Everything he had done, getting John and Felicity to leave the Team, was for the best. They had been hurt because of him and now that he was alone everything would be better. Now the only one he had to worry about was himself. This was the way it started and it was the way it was meant to be.
A/N: Wow. I have had this in my head all night and I had to get it out. I was up until 3:00AM writing this down and even now I still don't think it's perfect but I still like it all the same.
As usual, Oliver is being his stubborn self in getting John to leave – I thought all he needed to do was mention his family and he would leave.
Felicity was different. She had her computer and things but she also loved him, it would be harder for him to get her to leave. He had to break her trust and love in him.
This didn't turn out as dark as I wanted it but in my head this is heartbreaking. I hope you guys like it and I'm wondering if I should continue on? I think I could write at least two more chapters to go with this. What do you think?
Read and review.