Everybody Loves Raymond

Season 11

Episode 2: Approach

Written by: Robert

Harley Quinn and Frank Castle walked together through the ancient castle. Everything was covered in dust. "Keep your guard up." Frank told Harley.

"What are they gonna do? Kill me?" She asked with a laugh.

"You can't be too sure. What happens when someone dies here?" He asked.

"Good point…" Harley said. "Hey, Frankie."

"What?" He asked.

"So your last name is Castle, right?"

"Yeah. Why?"

Harley started to giggle. "So Frank Castle… is in a castle?"

He sighed. "Yeah."

Harley laughed. "Get it?"

Frank glanced over to her. "If only jokes were a crime…"

It wasn't long before they found another large door. They pushed it open to see a strange looking man in a business suit.

"Hey! Weirdo, who's in charge here?" Harley asked the man.

"That would be me. Hunson Abadeer." He answered.

"Firstly, that's a weird name. Secondly, give me Ray back!" Harley shouted.

He looked confused. "Who?"

"Kill his head off!" Harley said to Frank.

The Punisher didn't hesitate. He approached Hunson Abadeer, wrapped his arms around his neck, and quickly snapped it. He dropped him to the floor.

"Seriously? It was that easy to kill the big head honcho of HFIL?" Harley asked, kicking the body.

"Guess so." Frank answered.

"TARNATION" Someone shouted as a door was kicked open. "Here I was waitin' for the most lucrative business transaction of my life and here you are killin' my constituent!" The man said. He was an older man, dressed like a cowboy.

"Are you a rich Texas oil tycoon?" Harley asked, looking confused.

"Yes I indeed am!" He said, adjusting his large belt buckle. "And now that Mr. Abadeer is dead, or whatever happens when you kill someone here, how the hay am I gonna make this deal?"

Harley nudged the Punisher's arm. "Hey. Frankie. Why dontcha just take that Hunson guy's place? Ya like punishin' and whatnot. Talk with Texas Pete over there." She whispered.

Frank thought about it for a moment and for the first time, Harley saw him smile. It was a faint hint of a smile, but it was there. He stepped forward to the rich Texan. "What was this deal?" He asked.

Harley sat as Frank and the Texan talked out a deal. Basically it was to allow him to look for oil in HFIL in exchange for Texas. "I don't know what gives you the authority to hand over Texas, but I'll take it. You've got yourself a deal." The Punisher said, shaking the Texan's hand.

"YEEEEEEHAWWWW!" He shouted, hopping in the air. He began to wave his cowboy hat around. "I'll get right to diggin', pardner! It's a mighty fine day for Texas Pete!"

Harley laughed. "That was his real name?"

Once they were alone, The Punisher looked through various files in a desk until he found a familiar name. "This who you're looking for?" He asked, handing over a file with Ray's name on it.

"Yes!" Harley said, flipping it open. "He ain't in HFIL? Huh…" She said, looking through the papers. She kept the file and smiled. "So. Are ya comin' with me? Looks like my journey isn't over yet."

"I think I'm gonna stay here." Frank answered. "Being in charge of a place like this suits me. Punishing the guilty." He said. "And it looks like the way out is through that door." He pointed to a door with an 'EXIT' sign above it. Harley gave Frank a hug and made her way to the door. "I'll miss ya, Franky." She said.

"I'm sure you'll see me again." Frank said.

"Kinda eerie sayin' that when you run HFIL now." She laughed.

Then Harley walked through the door.

To Be Continued…

Frank sat at his desk. He looked through more files until he saw one labeled 'Harleen Quinzel'. It was one of the thicker files out of the countless that he looked through. "Hmm…" He thought to himself. Then he opened it up.