A/N: This is a filler story set between Season 1 and 2 written for the 2012 Bromance Big Bang. My aim was to explain away some of the strange behaviour of the characters, instead I seem to just ramble on. Still I hope you enjoy it.
PS: big thank you to my beta reader, any mistakes are my fault.
Some wonderful art for this story can be found here: Some wonderful art for this story can be found on AO3: archiveofourown - works - 508776
Rescue Me
Friday 19:05pm
Toby looked across at the small town house on the far side of the street. If it was for sale it would probably be classed a compact starter home. It was sandwiched between two other similar houses, part of a much longer row. The stretch of grass at the front was neatly trimmed and covered with play equipment.
He tilted his head looking at dark windows and let go of the tight grip on his mental barriers trying to get a sense of the family inside. It was impossible, thoughts from the homes down both sides of the street, buzzed in his mind like radio static. Exhaustion ran through every bone in his body and he couldn't focus enough to pick out individuals, but they all rang with a single theme: family. It was an alien concept to him, but even so for a tiny moment longing burnt through him and he stamped it out as quickly as it came.
"So that's it right?" Oz asked, nudging him gently and breaking him out of his thoughts.
Toby didn't turn and look, but he nodded briefly. "Yeah that's it."
"Are they in?"
Toby started a bit at the question. "Probably," he replied, and then on Oz's doubtful look added, "There are lot of people around and I'm not a bloodhound."
He expected an annoying or vaguely witty come back but Oz just nodded and said nothing. Silence descended between them for a few long minutes.
"Tob-"
Toby 'heard' what he was going to say and cut him off before he could start. "I'm fine, I need to do this."
Oz raised his hands for a second in mock surrender. "Okay, but-"
"Oz," Toby cut him off again a bit more harshly. "I know alright I'm-"
He trailed off at his partner's glare. "I know you know what I'm thinking but I'm going to say it out loud, for my sake. That woman wasn't your mother, and the man in that house isn't you. You don't need to do this." The soft but firm tone in Oz's voice was becoming more and more familiar since the events of the last few months.
He shut his eyes and let the friendly concern wash over him, ground him. "Oz I know okay, I know this isn't about me, but I need to. I promised her."
There must have been something in his tone because his partner sighed and then just nodded. Okay take your time. I'll be here.
"You don't need to wait," Toby countered before getting out the car. He made his way quickly through the gate and across the garden, knocking on the door before he could change his mind.
The tall middle age man looked exactly like the man in photos Toby had seen the previous evening, except for the air of grief and the dark rings under his eyes.
"I'm sorry we're not-" The man was already turning away and closing the door when Toby interrupted.
"My name's Toby Logan, I'm a paramedic."
The closing door jerked open abruptly and the man inside seemed to see him for the first time. "Are? Were you?"
Toby nodded sadly to the question. "I was with your mother when she died. I was hoping we could talk."
Thursday 16:13 pm
The heavy Toronto rush hour hadn't yet started but the Gardner Express Way was already nothing more than a car park. The slow intermittent wail of the siren was enough to encourage most of the stationary cars to try and tuck themselves into the barriers and shoulders of the clogged carriageway. But frustrated drivers leant on their horns and the occasional car edged forward into the path of the oncoming emergency vehicles, desperate to maintain its place in a queue of traffic that wasn't going anywhere.
Toby gritted his teeth and leant forward willing them to move faster. He was glad that for once he hadn't insisted on driving, he didn't envy Oz right now. The police car leading them was nearly half their size and slipped effortlessly though the narrow gaps in the traffic, while the rig ambled through with all the grace of a bull in a china shop.
"Hey, I'd rather be driving my girl than that thing," Oz nodded at his mirror and not for the first time Toby found himself wondering whether Oz could some how pick up on his thoughts. He followed his partner's gaze to the scene behind them; the huge elephant of a fire engine was coping even less well with the traffic and was getting left behind.
Finally after minutes that seemed like hours they reached the site of the incident. Reached what to the untrained eye must have seemed to be chaos. Cars across all lanes were stationary and their drivers sat cursing in frustration as they were ignored by the traffic cops. Further along rescue crews stood passively, or wandered round the scene seemingly with nothing to do. For the drivers waiting on either carriageway it was as though no one was working to free up the road.
But to the rescue crews it was organized chaos and Toby took in every detail as Oz eased them through it. They were the third crew on the site, on the other carriageway an Ambulance was stood close to the smashed remains of a motorbike as the crew worked on the rider. Toby pointedly ignored Oz's suddenly intense thoughts about the safety of motorbikes - it wasn't like he'd actually brought one yet.
Finally they were signalled to stop and as Toby jumped out the ambulance he got his first good look at the accident. A truck, an 18 wheeler straddled the meridian its trailer tilting precariously over the top of a small flat bed pickup.
Pulling out as much kit as they could carry, they listened as one of the Paramedic's already on site gave them a quick handover. The truck and lorry driver were both injured, but superficially; the motor biker was a few hours away from becoming an organ donor, and somewhere between the twisted wreck of the pickup and the huge mass of the truck was an SUV and a trapped driver.
Thursday 16:24 pm
Oz took in a lung full of ice cold Toronto air, it helped put a lid on the adrenalin rush that was kicking in. This was a big one, and that was a bad thing because the big ones - the MVA's, construction accidents, huge building fires - meant bad things for the people involved, the victims and their families and... Well everyone. But for a pair of not long qualified ACPs with a lot to prove it was an opportunity like gold dust.
That was a completely inappropriate thought.
Oz made a point of thinking it at his partners back, though from the set of Toby's shoulders and the way his head tilted towards the wreckage Oz could tell his partner wasn't listening, at least not to him. Following Toby's gaze Oz looked toward that gap between the two smashed vehicles and let out a low whistle. The SUV was barely visible between the two larger vehicles. It seemed impossible that anyone could be alive in the wreckage.
"Yeah." replied the lead Fire & Rescue officer in response to Oz's reaction.
"She's alive." Oz knew it was a statement not a question, but Toby's voice held a bewilderment that was easily misinterpreted by an outsider.
"Yes" The fire officer responded, "alive and conscious, we've been talking to her as best we can but we haven't been able to make a proper assessment."
Noticing the officer's frown when Toby didn't move or respond Oz took a step forward. "Yeah well we're at your service. Just," Oz glanced at the wreck warily, "find us a safe way in."
Thursday 16:50 pm
Toby watched with detached curiosity as Wilson, the officer in charge of the rescue team, inspected the results of the first phase of the securing the wreck; Hydraulic rams locked the suspensions of all three vehicles in place. Chains and a mini rigging system had started to take the weight of the two larger wrecks preventing them crushing the SUV further. The tail gate of the SUV had been removed and the glass windows as far as could be reached had been knocked out or made safe.
Now they were just waiting for a decision. Shutting his eyes in frustration Toby turned his attention back to the women in the centre of the mass of twisted metal, and sucked in a sharp breath as a wave of pain washed over him.
"How is she doing?" Oz's voice was laced with concern and the same impatience he was feeling.
He shook his head tensely, they both knew he couldn't make a diagnosis this way, but he could give them a better idea of what they were dealing with. "She's strong, but she's in pain, a lot of-" Toby broke off abruptly at Oz's sharp hiss.
Wilson was heading back to them. "Okay boys, it's as secure as it's going to be." He said curtly.
Toby nodded decisively. "Then we can go in."
A hand on his arm stopped him before he could pick up his kit. "Wait, I'm not happy about this, but it might take a couple of hours before we can get one of those vehicles off the car. I just need you to go in take a quick look, let us know medical situation and if a rear extraction is going to be possible. One of you." He added as they both went to grab their bags.
Toby glanced at his partner, then at the small gap between the roof and the SUV's tailgate. The roof was crushed where some of the truck's load had fallen on it and the gap between it and the trunk wasn't much more than a couple of feet.
Oz glanced back across at him a wry smile on his face. I think this one's yours man, he conceded silently.
There was a sense of relief but also a disappointment in his partner's thoughts and Toby couldn't help but understand. He could feel the trapped woman's pain and fear and he could feel the tension growing amongst the crews at the scene, but as the Fire and Rescue team checked the set up one last time he also felt the surge of adrenalin. Oz was right it was completely inappropriate but the big jobs, the life and death moments made the weeks of skinned knees and hypochondriacs worth while.
Thursday 16:58 pm
He left his kit on the tarmac and with help from Oz and one of the firemen squeezed through the narrow gap pulling himself through the long space at the rear of the SUV, before easing himself head first onto a pile of papers, and wrapped presents on the rear seats.
"Hello?" The voice was frail and frightened.
Carefully manoeuvring himself upright Toby answered, "Hi, I'm a paramedic, don't move. I'm coming to you."
For a moment there was no response except a sob of relief. Then a deep breath as he felt the trapped woman gather herself, "I don't think I could if I wanted to."
"Well we'll sort that soon, for now just stay as still as you can." He replied trying to keep his tone light. He reached back and dragged across the reduced kit that Oz had put together. "I'm in and okay." He called before turning his entire attention to his patient.
Settling himself into the foot-well behind the driver's seat Toby took a deep breath, "I'm right behind you, how are you doing?" He asked as gently as possible.
"I've been better." As bad as the situation, Toby was glad to hear the humour in her words, the stronger and calmer the patient the better their chances.
"Well let's see what we can do." He told her as he reached over and placed his hands either side of her head supporting her and reminding her not to move as he made a quick assessment and fitted a neck brace.
He had finished with the brace and was running his hands over and down both her shoulders when she let out a nervous laugh that did nothing to hide her pain from him, "You didn't tell me your name."
He paused briefly moving into the gap between the front seats so she could see him properly, "Sorry Toby Logan, I'm a paramedic, and I'm going be with you till we can get you out."
The victim, an older woman perhaps in her mid fifties, reached out a shaking hand. She had brunette hair with greying roots, and the corners of her eyes wrinkled as she laughed softly. "Thank you Toby, my name's Margaret Benson, Marg to my friends. I'm your trapped driver for the evening."
Thursday 17:11 pm
Oz groaned and stretched as he mentally mapped out a staging area near the rig. The last of the other EMS crews had gone. He'd spent the last ten minutes helping them stabilize and then load the badly injured biker on to their rig. No one was holding out much hope.
A movement from the firemen at the rear of the vehicle broke his thoughts and he rushed to join them lugging as much kit as he could carry with him.
"What took you?" He demanded as Toby's dark head appeared in the tight space at the rear of the crushed vehicle.
"It's a little close in there." Came the curt reply.
Oz winced at familiar tension in his partner's tone - it didn't bode well for their patient. He opened his mouth to ask but was cut off abruptly by Wilson. "What's the situation?"
Toby lowered his voice and leaned forward as much as he could as he to run the numbers. The patient was conscious alert and talking. GCS of 14, C-Spine immobilised. Her BP was low but seemed stable, resps, good but sats low 90's. As he listened Oz packed equipment; a bag of saline and one of ringers, a non-rebreather mask, but the Fire Officer shook his head at the oxygen tank.
Then Toby delivered the blow no one wanted to hear, "Her legs are pinned. I can't see much in there, but the dashboard's moved - it's not good." He paused and rubbed his head and Oz recognized it as a sign of frustration. "I think she might be impaled."
You didn't need to be a telepath to feel the palpable dip in the mood of the rescue team. They'd hoped for a quick way out, rapid extraction through the rear of the car. Oz had seen it done in training; stabilise the patient, cut out all the seats, back board in, slide the patient out, no problem. He caught the dark look his partner's eyes, the silent communication nothing to do with telepathy, and grimaced - impalement meant a big problem.
Thursday 17:21 pm
'It's okay, Marg. You're an idiot, a stupid old woman getting scared at nothing, but you're going to be okay. Do what the pretty paramedic says and you'll be okay.'
Toby suppressed a laugh at the thoughts as he manoeuvred himself and the second bag of kit on to the back seat. Urgency battled with a sense of respect as he gathered the spilled folder of photos and put them carefully on the wrapped gifts he'd pushed aside earlier. When he finally squeezed himself back into the tight gap between the front seats, he flashed his best smile at her. "I'm back." He said as he focused his attention on checking the IV. He would have liked to get a second one in but the dashboard was tight to her chest and her left arm was inaccessible. Instead he concentrated on pushing the low dose of pain meds he and Oz had discussed.
He noticed she was watching his face closely as he worked and as he finished up she sighed, "You don't look happy, not good news?" At her words Toby looked up into fearful brown eyes, and mentally kicked himself for taking her strong thoughts at face value. She might be putting a brave face on things, thinking positive but deep down she was terrified.
"You're doing fine." He said hoping the truth of his words would show through. "It just might take a bit longer to get you out than we'd hoped."
"Oh dear." Again the words were strong but now he was tuned to it, her growing fear burned through his mind, an unwelcome intruder.
"Hey this isn't your fault, you aren't causing any trouble. In fact this is what me and my partner live for. " He said as he pulled out the torch Oz had found for him, then took two deep breaths belatedly trying to shut her distressed thoughts out. "I'm going to try and get a better look at your legs? Is that okay?"
At her nod Toby wedged himself back between seats and, torch on, cut aside part of the skirt obscuring his view. As he worked she laughed, a short sharp sound filled with false lightness and barely suppressed pain. "God, do you know how long I've dreamed about having a good looking young man like you between my legs?"
He smiled, laughed lightly, and feigned shyness as was the social etiquette, but he could feel her thoughts. The view of twisted metal and flesh that was lit up by the thin beam of light, made his blood run cold.
"What would your husband say?" He asked casually hoping to steer her thoughts from the present, while he focused on the gruesome sight in front of him.
"Single I'm afraid, never could find anyone who would put up with me for long." Her response was one of genuine amusement.
He bit his lip, but as he pulled himself back upright he had to work hard not to let the sight of her ruined legs show on his face. "I can relate to that" he replied wryly.
This time her laugh was loud and nearly genuine. "I can't believe a good looking young man like you can be single."
He thought for a moment, technically he wasn't but there was also no doubt in his mind that he would be soon. Once again things between Liv and him were - the way things between Liv and him always seemed to end up. "She's a Doctor. It's... complicated." He told her.
"Oh no." She replied the slight shake of her head as much as the brace would allow. "Things shouldn't be complicated at your age. You need to be out there having fun, not being complicated."
Toby laughed "Actually I thought it was the other way round. Things are all complicated and angst and in a couple of years things get better and we settle down, end up with kids and all the rest." He winced at the sudden rush of emotion that hit him as he thought about children and family. Though he wasn't quite sure if the emotion was from Marg or himself, Marg he decided quickly though there was no sign of it on her face.
"That's for sixteen year olds full of hormones, not good looking paramedics who are twenty something?" She was laughing at him through her pain, and her tone was berating.
"Thirty," He supplied, but before he could say anything else the radio on the seat beside him hissed.
"Logan, I need you back out, we're ready to shift this thing."
Thursday 17:43pm
Suddenly Oz found himself and wishing he could either read minds or stick to his Aunt Yasemin's diet, because if he'd gone in then Toby would have been able to provide a link to the outside world. All Oz could do was repack IV equipment and fidget. Not fidget... organise. With not much else to do he'd checked with St Luke's and confirmed the biker had been called DOA.
"Note to self," Oz muttered, "nip this 'I'm getting a motorbike' idiocy in the bud before you end up having to break in a new partner," He shuddered at the metal image of Toby being loaded - neck brace on and several inches of ET tube down his throat - into the back of an ambulance.
He snorted shrugging off the thought, and then paced a bit trying to make it look like he had a purpose. Part of him wanted to stop trying to protect his partner, since the disaster a few months ago Toby had done a great job of proving he had a handle on things: Headaches gone; telepathy under control; driving no problem; crowds no problem, and being a lying unemotional piece of shit no problem.
Woah.
Oz stopped dead in his tracks at shocked at his sudden anger. Where the hell had that come from?
He glanced guiltily across to the stricken SUV, but he was sure his partner was too busy to pick up on his stray thoughts. Which still left him with the question - was he really that mad at Toby?
He thought about it for a minute, it wasn't anger but frustration; it was the same way he felt before he knew about the telepathy. When they'd first met Toby had seemed a very easy person to get to know and on the surface he was, but underneath it was a different matter. Oz thought they'd finally broken through all of his secrets and protective bullshit, but Charlie's death, and his mother's disappearance had set them both back. Toby insisted he was fine, and Oz had been letting him get away with the lie.
"Bullshit" he muttered to himself. When this shift was over he was going to get some beers, and set up an intervention. The fact was, somebody really needed to talk to his partner.
"Bey!" Wilson booming voice interrupted his thoughts. "I need you to talk to your partner!"
Oz did a double take as the other man approached him with a look of anger plastered across his face that would've put Ryder to shame. He knew instantly what must have happened because if his partner announcing he could read minds didn't surprise him why would the fact that Toby was risking his own safety, unnecessarily, for a total stranger?
He sighed deeply; Ryder was going to have their asses for this, again.
"I'll speak to him," Oz told the F&R officer, but knowing it would be futile he added, "but if he thinks there's a medical necessity it'd be better if you just got on with it."
There was an angry grunt, but Wilson turned on his heels and stalked off.
"Bullshit." Oz muttered again under his breath as the other man left. Toby, you better not get killed pulling this stunt because after Wilson and Ryder are done with you, I'm going to kill you myself.
Thursday 17:57
The car was dark now, the evening sun was heading out of range and the make shift boards and blankets - put up to protect the two of them from broken glass and metal - shut out the rest of the light.
Toby shifted his weight trying to get comfortable in the footwell behind the drivers seat. In the dim light he could just make out the stack of presents and the jumble of photos he'd shifted earlier, but the darkness set the mood and the fear that was pouring of his patient in waves had his heart pounding in his chest. Her right hand was in his and he squeezed it hoping it was reassurance and not his own fear he conveyed back to her.
A motor started up close by and if there were any doubts about his decision to stay they were blown away by her sudden panic, amplified by her tight grip. He squeezed her hand again, "Hey okay? You're about to witness some of Canada's best rescue teams in action, just try and relax, enjoy the show." He paused and felt her grip soften, "That's better, what else could you possibly want to be doing right now?"
"Seeing my grandchildren."
The sudden whispered statement was nearly drowned out by the grinding of straining metal. He imagined steel ropes reaching their tension and one of the two huge vehicles giving up and slowly moving off the car. He could see it in the minds of the rescue crews outside and it helped calm him, let him concentrate on caring for his patient. "Do you want us to contact your family?"
Her first response was a harsh "No."
She took a couple of shaky breaths before continuing, "No that not what I... It's just that's what I should be doing, and that's why I came to Toronto, to see my son's children." Her mind was spinning with flashes of memory now; photos of unknown grandchildren, the search for presents that strangers might enjoy, packing and loading the car with a child-like anticipation.
Toby peered through the dark at the chaos on the back seat and winced. The best laid plans he thought casually, but his mind was making connections he didn't want it to. "Hey," He said, voice a bit too loud as though trying shut off his own thoughts, "when we get you out of here we'll ring your son, I'm sure he'll meet you at the hospital."
"I doubt it," she whispered with a sad certainty.
"Of course he will." Toby countered.
"I don't know, I barely know him." Her words were whispered and he didn't so much hear them as sense them. They were tainted with feelings of abandonment and loneliness and the image - a new born being lifted from his mother's arms – different but far too familiar. His own emotions flared in a way he wasn't prepared for.
Toby opened his mouth to try and form a response but a loud crunch and the screech of twisting metal interrupted him. Another sudden wave of terror from his patient spiked through him, washing away all the other emotions and for once he didn't mind.
Thursday 18:13pm
If he felt like a third wheel before, Oz was now getting a master class in how to be completely useless. Wilson was taking his partner's stubbornness out on him and he'd been cut completely out the loop.
Not that there was much he could be doing, except admire the view. Technically the rescue - the scene playing out in front of him - was brilliance. If this was a training exercise and Toby was next to him they'd be sharing some banter, arguing that perhaps they could do it better, or that Toby had the wrong super power. Instead he watched silently as thick metal cables hit maximum tension and started to pull the truck's weight up off the SUV.
He watched in silence for a few minutes then gave up and checked the back of the ambulance again. After he was done he sat on the tailgate and watched as the fire crew continued to lift the truck. His anger from earlier had faded, he of all people knew it was hard not to resent his partner sometimes. Oz was a good medic, okay he was a bit casual sometimes but he knew his stuff, he put in his hours, and he'd made his ACP at the same time as his 'hot shot' partner without having the superpowers. Even so everyone focused on Toby the blue eyed orphan boy.
When they'd made the grade his parents had thrown another little party at the restaurant for them and Oz had felt some of the same resentment at his folks as they clucked round his Toby. It had faded quickly though when he remembered that the last time they'd all been at the restaurant Charlie had been with them, and the longing look on Toby's face as he watched Oz dance with his mother would stay with him for ever.
He took a deep breath and pushed aside the sympathy he felt for his partner, he knew Toby didn't want it. The short burst of a siren interrupted his thoughts. On the other carriageway a paramedic car was making its way the wrong way through 3 lanes. The doctor they'd requested, from what Toby had said there was no way this patient was getting out without serious surgical care.
Oz headed over to fill the newcomers in as they pulled up level with the ambulance and then sighed as he got a good look at the vehicle's occupants. Mellor, a cocky first year resident was bad enough but the doctor they'd chosen to send was Olivia, another of his partner's issues. Oz had really preferred it when the two of them were on the off part of the endless 'on/off cycle' they seemed to be stuck in. He wondered if he should get her in on his intervention, but figured the way things were heading between the two of them they could work it out on their own.
The two doctors crossed over to his side of the carriageway and nodded. "Oz" Liv greeted him, her tone calm and professional.
He grunted a reply that probably conveyed some of his current frustration but was lost on her; she was looking past him staring open mouthed at the wreck in front of her. "Our patient is-"
Oz nodded, "In there? Yep."
"Oh," There was a slight waiver in her tone and Oz sensed a crack in Dr Fawcett's armour. After a moment of silence she looked around and frowned. "Where's Toby?"
Oz could help the vindictive satisfaction he felt as he raised his arm slowly pointing at the wreck. "In there." Yeah he thought at her suddenly worried expression, he can be your problem for a bit.
Thursday 18:15pm
Once the truck was nearly clear of the car Toby decided it was safe enough to move back to the front passenger seat. Brushing the broken glass away he sat quietly listening to her story as he re-checked her pressure and the line he'd put in.
It wasn't an uncommon tale a girl pregnant too young struggling to bring up a child alone. Her thoughts were of drugs and alcohol and barely noticing whether her baby son was the same room. "But that's not you now." He said quietly taking in the nice suit dress and expensive looking gifts.
She glanced at him. "When they took him away from me it gave me the chance to get my life together." She stopped drawing in deep breaths. "How do you explain that to someone? 'Letting you go made my life better'."
Toby grimaced at her dropping stats wishing he had that oxygen with him. "Shush, I need you to concentrate on breathing. You can worry about the rest when we get you out of here."
"All right," she whispered, but there were tears in her eyes, and now the glow of the emergency lights reached in the car he could see her colour and he didn't like it. He took her pulse again, at her wrist and then through the collar, and tried not to wince. He thought of a million things to say; a million ways he could reassure her that there was nothing that an abandoned child would do to find his mother. But it wasn't true, he'd accepted his mothers 'death' without question. Now 25 years later he knew she'd been alive a month ago, knew she'd been trying to reach him, but what was he doing? Staying quiet, laying low, and listening to Ray instead of screaming from the rooftops and searching for her. Was she out there somewhere thinking that he didn't care?
There was a tap on the frame of the driver's door and Toby looked up to see the faces of the rescue crew peering in at them. "See, won't be long now," he said lightly, but frowned as he retook her pressure.
The sound of crunching of metal started again and Toby watched, one hand on his patients shoulder, as the driver's side door was removed.
He did a double take as Olivia pushed her way past the crews and poked her head through the gap where the door had been. "How are you guys doing?" She had her best doctor voice on but he didn't miss the angry glare she shot him.
Toby shifted his weight awkwardly suddenly aware of impending cramp. "We're good aren't we?" He replied lightly but gave the Liv a meaningful look and a tiny shake of his head.
Marg drew in a shaky breath that hitched painfully, and he was glad they could get her on oxygen now. "Yeah. I'm okay."
Carefully Olivia leaned as far into the car as she could and cast an experienced eye over his work, while he updated her.
When he'd finished she looked was tense but professional and he took a moment to stretch out his tired muscles and watch her work. It was a relief to have backup, especially from someone he trusted.
After a moment he noticed green eyes watching him. Marg's expression was hidden by the oxygen mask but her eyes – and thoughts – had their sparkle back. With one hand she lifted the mask slightly and whispered, "Doctor Complicated I presume?"
Toby nodded slightly, grinning as he replaced the mask. "Yeah."
The car was getting busy now as the rescue crews started to assess what to do next. The rear door on the driver side had been taken out and it was an angry Wilson that glared through the gap at him.
"Right we're going to lift the roof off, Logan out, let your partner take over for a bit. We need to talk."
Thursday 18:34pm
"So," began Oz lightly as he began to push the pain meds that Liv had okayed "I hope my partner didn't bore you too much."
She smiled shook her head slightly in the negative. "No, he's lovely." It was muffled by the Oxygen mask but Oz knew exactly what she said.
He rolled his eyes at her, "Not another one, trust me you aren't the first to think that my partner is some kind of superhero. It's those blue puppy dog eyes. I'm going to be kind and let you know there's a queue, a very long queue."
He saw her eyes flick over to where Liv was talking with the rescue crews, and raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, she's at the front, and I can't believe he told you that. Toby's normally mister stoic, I'm the chatty one." And as if to prove it Oz let his mouth start to ramble away. He turned his thoughts away from his partner and focused his eyes on the growing group of people in the extract area.
He didn't know how long it'd been - or which of the catalogue of 'Oz stories' he'd used up - when the huddle of Fire crew and medics broke up and headed towards the car. It was Liv who reached them first looking far more professional than he's ever seen her.
"Margaret" She started gently, her whole focus on her patient. "We're going to have to do some work to free your legs and it might take some time. We're going to give you some more drugs for the pain and Oz here is going to stay with you."
Oz grinned and winked at her trying to keep things light even as he saw her try to look towards the extraction zone where Toby was. He leant forward smiling. "I should reassure you I'm here right now because I'm the better paramedic, but really I think she knows you're a threat. That's why old blue eyes is over there."
She snorted at him then laughed. "You know your partner warned me about comments like that?"
"I don't doubt it," Oz grinned and then squeezed her shoulder as Liv came back to the open side of the car. Behind her Mellor was carrying a small pack of surgical equipment and a couple fire officers brought in more cutting gear. Oz swallowed hard, took a deep breath, then knowing what was coming focused his attention a hundred percent on his patient.
Thursday 19:05 pm
Toby stood in the staging area trying to look relaxed and ready, and get a grip on the anger he felt towards Wilson. It was clear now that Margaret Benson was in trouble. Her condition was deteriorating and there was a good chance injuries that had been stable were being compromised by the final extraction.
Deep down he knew his partner was good - perhaps a better medic than him in some ways - but he'd promised her he'd stay with her and standing on the sidelines felt like a betrayal.
He saw the crews around the car move the last of the heavy cutting equipment out the way and felt the tension on site go up a notch. Then Toby moved; ignoring the order to stay put he pushed past the fire officers to join the other medics. Nodding sharply at Oz and Liv he took his place next to Mellor ready to help.
There was very little left of the car now and the last panel was pulled away with a final dull crunch.
"Okay let's just take our time do this right." Olivia said as she nodded at him; she was in charge of this part of the rescue not Wilson. Steadily they moved the stretcher and backboard into place, then moved and secured the IV lines and monitoring equipment. A glance at the portable monitor as he lifted it across it made Toby's heart drop; things were a lot worse than he had thought.
"Right now we go, gently, on my signal." Olivia ordered as hands reached forward and there was an audible sigh of relief as Margaret Benson was lifted smoothly from the remains of her car and - backboard in place - onto the waiting gurney.
They were meters away from the staging area - Toby grinning as the joy of a whole team of rescue workers flooded through him - when the soft bleeps of the portable monitor turned into a high pitched wail.
Thursday 19:57 pm
"Time to stop. I'm calling it."
Toby was breathless now and each compression was matched by a deep intake of air and a growing ache in his arms. She had gone from his mind over half an hour ago and they hadn't had a rhythm worth crap for nearly as long but Toby sucked in a deep breath and pushed a little harder on his next compression.
He managed about three more before slender fingers reached across and touched the over-strained muscles in his arms. "Enough."
Toby ignored her glancing across at the monitor desperate for a rhythm, a single bleep, anything.
"That's it. Enough." Olivia's tone was harsher this time and was accompanied by a focused, unspoken command. Toby glared at her as he kept his rhythm even, and from the way she raised her hands and moved away he guessed you didn't need to be a telepath to hear his angry back off.
He counted out maybe ten more compressions before a pair of large tanned hands covered his, stopping him in his tracks. "Toby?" Toby, no more.
Ignoring Oz's unspoken thought he tried to move back into place, but his partner was stronger than he looked - and he was right. There was moment of silence and Toby realised that he was panting, sucking in breaths as though he'd run a marathon.
Blocking out his friends he sat back on his heels and tried to control his rapid breathing. The lifeless green eyes of Margaret 'Marg to my friends' Benson stared blankly up at the night sky.
It was getting late and on the road crews were erecting more emergency lights around the crash site. He guessed it would take them the rest of the evening and into the night to clear the scene, but he knew from experience that by the time the Friday morning rush hour started the only signs that something had happened would be the new patches of guard rail.
The thought made his stomach roll and he stood quickly, taking refuge behind the line of emergency vehicles before gagging up bile.
When the heaving finally stopped Toby pulled himself upright and took in a deep breath of cool night air.
Look at them all stood round doing nothing. Our tax dollars in action...
Idiot driver, I needed to be home an hour ago.
A stream of tired, frustrated, thoughts marched through his mind like an army of angry ants and he felt rage bubble under the surface. The scene they were watching through the windscreens of their little heated havens was an inconvenience to them; an annoying hiccup in their otherwise ordinary day.
He shut his eyes trying to block them out. But a horn sounded in the distance, breaking his concentration, and it set off a series of similar replies from around the stationary traffic. Without thinking Toby found himself heading across the carriageways ready confront the first person he found.
A strong hand around his bicep stopped him."They don't mean it man, they wouldn't be doing that, thinking that shit if they knew." Toby frowned and turned to see his partner - hand still gripping him tightly - looking out into the queuing traffic.
"How do you know what they are thinking?" He asked sharply.
Oz snorted, "I have a car, I've sat at the end of these queues furious I'm going to miss some crappy movie or be late home before I remember the things we deal with. They don't have that, maybe they'll feel guilty when they read about it in the papers tomorrow, hey maybe they'll choke on cereal."
"As long as I don't have to pick them up." Toby whispered harshly, unwilling to sympathise with a road full of restless commuters while a woman lay dead a few meters away. He took a deep breath, tried to unclench his jaw and muttered. "I liked her."
"I know I'm sorry man." Oz's tone was softening but the grip on his arm remained firm and Toby was glad because he was ready to hit someone hard.
Instead he tapped his knuckles against his forehead. "I mean I connected to her, there was something about her - she was coming to make amends with her son Oz. She should still be here."
A surge of rage that wasn't his streaked through him and Toby glanced back at his partner surprised. Oz released his grip and grabbed him again spinning him round and forcing him to look back across the wreckage. The sky was dark and heavy and the first few spots of icy rain where starting to fall. "You think we don't all feel that?" Oz's hand was griping the back of his neck and Toby didn't resist as his was forced to look back at the devastated wreck of the SUV. "You think you're the only one that cares, because you can..." Knuckles tapped against the back of his head a bit too hard before gesturing at the crews still working. "You aren't the only one who's spent the last few hours working their ass off trying to save her."
Toby pulled away from him and paced one hand rubbing at his aching head. He glanced guiltily at Oz, and then at Olivia who was watching them cautiously from a distance. "Sorry" he muttered.
Oz sighed and Toby could feel some of his partners anger abate. "Look Toby I know you have all this unresolved grief or whatever from your mother's disappearance but you have to deal with it in your own time." He pointed to the ambulance where they both knew Margaret Benson's body was. "That's not her so you don't get to make this about you, and you don't get to shut us all out while you try to get yourself killed playing the hero."
There was a long silence between them, and Toby struggled and failed to find a response to his partner's tirade. He resisted the urge to mutter another weak apology; instead he stared his partner in the eye and asked plainly "What now?"
Oz smiled softly and suddenly all the tension between them was gone. "You know our shift ended two hours ago right?" Oz nodded to the ambulance they spent close to twelve hours a day in and the dead woman inside. "Let's get them both home and then drink a whole lot of beer."
Epilogue:
Friday 20:13pm
For the first half hour Oz sat quietly with the radio on low, just thinking, and he came to the conclusion that there'd be far too much 'thinking', he flicked over to his CD player, upping the volume.
It was ten sick young-blood tracks later when Toby reappeared from the house. Oz turned the volume down a notch and reached to push the door open as his partner peered in. "I said you could go."
"You said I didn't need to wait. But I'm such a cool friend and you have no wheels so I thought I'd hang around." Oz countered.
There wasn't even the slightest hint of a smile on Toby's face as he pulled himself into the car, just a grim, tired expression. Oz could see his partner was falling apart and he was doing a rubbish job of hiding it now. "How did it go?" He asked tightly.
Toby sighed and rubbed his hands through his hair. "He's angry - and upset - but mainly angry."
"That we couldn't save her?" Oz asked.
His partner shook his head, "That just when he'd made the effort to put things behind them she..." He paused and rubbed his forehead. "She wanted so much to make amends but he blames her for dying."
Toby blew out a long shaky breath and Oz met his eyes. "It's called grief Toby it makes sane people crazy." There was a sharp nod and Oz took it as permission to speak the thoughts floating round his head. "You thought your mother abandoned you it's okay to be angry."
"I grew up thinking this thing had driven her mad, that she'd tried to kill us both." Toby reply was whispered and Oz knew he'd hit a nerve.
"I grew up thinking Santa Claus was myth dreamt up by white kids to torment Muslims." At Toby's ever so slightly amused snort Oz swung his head round, "I kid you not scarred me for life." He paused a beat and then focused back on the issue at hand. "We know you were wrong now, we know your mother gave you up, hid you away in Canada's largest city to protect you."
Toby was quiet for a long time and Oz let him think turning the music off completely. Finally his partner spoke. "You think Ray is right then I should drop it. Lay low and slowly fall apart."
"First I don't think it's slowly. If you are going to use my thoughts against me get it right. Second I'm not going to tell you what to do, if you want we can drive to Albany right now and tear the place apart looking for her."
"But you don't think we should." Toby voice had a flat tone that Oz didn't like.
"You want to know what I think?" At Toby's nod Oz turned into his seat and faced his partner. I think I don't want to do this. He thought and then took a deep breath. "I think everything your mother did was to protect you when she tried to contact you, two people ended up dead. If your mother survived that crash, and if she's free and able to find you the only reason she wouldn't is that it's too dangerous. If she's not then anything you do will just put you and the people around you at risk." Oz was actually shaking slightly when he finished talking, Ozman Bey didn't say things like that, when things got tense he cracked a joke, lowered the tension - he didn't stick the knife in further. Casting a wary eye across at his best friend he once again wished he could read minds.
"You want to know what I think?" Toby's voice was quiet and he sounded tentative. "I think you're right. I think she's out there somewhere and either she can't come to me or won't, but if you or Liv were hurt -"
Oz swallowed hard and glanced across at his partner he couldn't believe Toby wasn't actually crying. Oz figured he was a minute away from crying like a school girl.
"That's because you are a school girl."
And even though that was Toby shutting the conversation down Oz grinned because they'd made a start. "Okay your place and food on the way." He said as he turned the key in the pumpkin's ignition.
There was a muted choking noise, the growl of a car trying to start. Oz blinked a couple of times and glanced at his partner. The next two attempts sounded even drier and he knew they weren't going anywhere soon. After the fifth Toby rolled his eyes and groaned.
"You didn't get her battery fixed."
Oz shook his head.
"And you sat out here for over an hour with the CD and heater on full blast but no engine."
Oz nodded, and Toby sighed as he pulled out his phone. "I love you Oz, but you reallyshouldn't have waited."
End