title: Popular
Summery: Parvaty wants to help Hemrione be popular. Song fic from Wicked
rating: Pg disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Wicked
Parvaty watched, frowning, as Hermione (who she had acctualy learned to like) tried, struggling, to put her bushy hair in a ponytail.
"You know...I could help you..." She said.
"Help me...with what?" Hermione asked, sighing contently as she managed a verry messy attempt for a pony, that would be verry painful to undo later on...
"With what?" Parvaty giggled "With...well...everything. Everything that matters, anyway..."
"Matters? Parvaty, I dont think I need help with school work..."
"School work!? Hermione, dear, that hardly matters. I mean...Popularity."
"...Popularity? Parvaty...I dont think---"
"You see, Mione, now that we're friends, I have decided to make you my new project."
"You really dont have to do that--"
"I know!" Squealed Parvaty, brightly "Thats what makes me so nice!"
And then, god help us, she broke into song...
"Whenever I see someone less fortunate then I --And lets face it, who isnt less fortunate then I-- My tender heart starts to bleed. Whenever somone needs a makeover, i simply need to take over. I know, I know exactly what they need. And even in your case," she looked Hermione over and sat her down in a chair in front of a mirror. " though its the toughest case I've had to face. Dont worry, Im determined to succeed. Follow my lead and you'll be POPULAR! Your gonna be Popular. I'll teach you the proper ploys, when you talk to boys, little ways to flirt and flounce," she smiled cheekily "I'll show you what shoes to wear, how to fix your hair--and god knows you need it, Mione-- Everything that really counts to be popular!"
Hermione frowned. Parvaty took out a brush and looked at Hermione, perplexed.
"your gonna be popular. You'll hang with the right Cohorts, you'll be good at sports, know the slang you got to know. So lets get started, cuz you got an awf-lly long way to go. dont be offended by my frank analysis think of it as personality dialisis. Now that i've chosen to become a pal, a sister, and adviser, theres nobody wiser. Not when it comes to popular--I know about popular. With an asist from me, to be who you'll be, instead of deary who-you-were...are..."
Hermione gave her an offended look, but she ignored it and went on.
"Theres nothing that will stop you from being pop-u-ler..Lar...we're gonna make you popular." She gave a feircefull tug on Hermione's ponytail and it came undone. Parvaty sighed, contented. "When I see depressing creachers with unpreposing feachers, I remind them on their own behalf, to think of Celebrated heads of state or specially great communicators, did they have brains or knowledge? Dont make me laugh!"
Hermione raised an eyebrow as Parvaty started applying make up.
"They were popular!" said Parvaty simply. "Please--It's all about popular. Its not about Aptitude, its the way your viewed, so its very shrewd to be, very very popular! Like me!"
"I...I have to go..." said hermione, wanting to escape from Parvaty ASAP.
"Your welcome!" Parvaty called after her. "And tho' you protest your disinterest, I know clandestedly, you'll grin and bare it, your new found popularity. You'll be popular...well..not as popular as me!"
She sat in the chair and gazed admiringly into the mirror.
THE END