Disclaimer: I don't own "Portal." (*)

Kill Her or Keep Her?

He was sitting, his unnatural light blue eyes staring closely at the screen before him. Surprisingly for himself, with no words to express, he continued to study the screen in silence. As time seemed at a stand-still to him, just….just looking at her, looking at her every move, her every gesture, her every expression, it all started to take its toll on him; being frustrated. After watching for so long, it was becoming obvious that he wasn't in total control; at least, when it came to her. In truth, she was getting the better of him, or, if it were to be a fact, was better than him.

Oh, he could just hear it now.

"Wow, you truly are pathetic, she may be a pain. You know, her being a lunatic and all, but, I was able to push her to complete a few tests at least.

But you, with you painfully in control, not only are you leading this entire facility to its destruction, but you can't even get your test-subject to complete one simple test.

Now, now, don't pout; I'm only stating the facts after all. Don't be hard on your-self, it is in your coding to have bad ideas, and thinking you can just walk in and take my place, it's definitely in the top ten of the most terrible ideas ever department.

With this idea, being number one.

Congratulations."

Within hearing that cold voice, fear would have originally struck him, but, noting how he was in control, how he had the power, he wasn't afraid in the slightest, no, in fact, if he were to be given a chance to see Her again, he wouldn't hesitate to destroy what was left of Her indefinitely. After a while of studying the monitor, seeing the two together, perhaps bonding, he was beginning to think putting Her in a potato was maybe too kind; letting Her live. After all, if the tables were turned, she wouldn't hold back, even if he were to try and fight back, he knew she would kill him in an instant. She tried once when she turned on, though, lucky for him then, he was only damaged.

But still, even if he wasn't bound by fear, something about Her voice continued to have a certain hold on him. And he didn't like it. Truthfully, the more he dwelled on the matter, the more furious he was becoming. Huh…maybe that was it. In the simplest terms, after taking what was Her's, fear was automatically replaced with hatred. Everything followed after was more or less a jumbled mess of emotions, emotions like anger, jealously, and betrayal. Though, those emotions were more towards her, while hatred was solely towards that computer he once feared. Even though he could say the name now, he continues with "Her," out of habit.

Overall, what he probably hated about that machine…was the fact that she always saw herself as the superior one. No one, no machine, nor human could ever match Her. Though, learning recently how she was deactivated once by a human…and, by her to be more precise, he knew pretty well that she indeed met Her match. But of course, being the ex-ruler of this mainframe…of this entire facility, she never admitted it to herself of being beat. She's so cold…unfeeling… arrogant…and only does things saying it's for the sake of science. In the end, she already faced defeat once, and even though she wouldn't take the loss, she at least acknowledged the woman's skills, not making the same mistake of underestimating her.

So then, finally, when it was his turn, an inferior machine at that, dethroning Her, not only didn't she take the loss well, but she still didn't come to terms in having a little respect for him as he probably would have liked. No, unlike the woman, seeing her as a worthy test-subject, he instead was still treated like garbage, or to be more precise in Her eyes, a moron, to his extreme distaste. Overall in that moment, he knew no matter what he did, she wouldn't see him to be worthy enough of anything. In Her words, he was and always will be created to do moronic things.

"You're not just any regular moron….

You were designed to be a moron…."

That memory soon played back in his mind. The mere words sticking to him like glue. In the weirdest way, taking into a count that machines could not feel, he remembered how hurt and angry he was. In reality, considering how he had won, he shouldn't have taken Her words to his core…to his artificial heart. Really, if he were to be like Her in that moment, he would have instantly crushed Her and moved on, but no, instead, he basically took out his angry not only on Her, but also to his once former friend; slightly regretting the moment when he saw her plummet down the elevator he broke in frustration.

Honestly, he would have felt remorse, but, knowing how the woman valued freedom, he never looked back. He knew that even if he redesigned this place to her liking, she would still want to leave rather than to stay with him. Sure, at the beginning he wanted freedom too, to run and find a safer place, but now that he was in control, he didn't feel the need to run, he could have made this place safe…for him…for her. But no, he knew that dream was too far-fetched, especially when he saw the fear in her eyes before she fell down the pit. Hmph…that was fine, he didn't need her anyway.

Or…so he thought.

"Grrr….this woman is doing it on purpose just to spite me!" he said angrily; coming back to the situation at hand.

After a few more minutes of waiting, it pretty much looked like if he was going to tear his hair out; having his hands over his head.

"I don't get it. I just don't get it at all. The woman's basically a natural when it comes to these kinds of things, and yet, here she is refusing to test for me. Really, it's not like I'm asking her to do something difficult, or something completely unknown to her. No, in fact, everything's right up her alley. Complete fairness if I'm honest, and, and speaking of being fair, I'm not even asking for much either, it's one, just one simple little test, of course, followed by others in the near future, but that's beside the point. My point is…I'm asking her to do something she already knows. Why, why can't she just give me the satisfaction? "

After a while, his hands soon slid down, having his face buried in them. At this point, he didn't know what to do. He wondered, should he continue to talk to her, using force like…Her, or should he dispose of the woman instead. Strangely enough, he was at war with himself, mostly because a side of him didn't really want to kill her, while the other side simply looked at the situation in a scientific way; stating that if the subject isn't giving out the desired results or worse, no results what's so ever, it was time to dispose of the subject and move on to another. But, the problem for him was that, she was the only one; there were no other humans around to be tested on. To him, the woman was one of a kind. Painful as it was, he needed her.

[Testing…..must keep testing….]

"The 'Itch' …." he continued; his voice now steady.

Though, as his hands now met the desk, it could be seen in his eyes that he could break at any moment.

"This feeling, this urge, it runs through my system repeatedly. I can't think of anything else than wanting to test. I gotta test…I gotta test, it's the same thing over and over, and I can't help but to act upon the desire. And, I thought it would have been a simple fix, making the other robots test, but they only proven to be bloody useless. Though, once when I saw the lady come into the picture…seeing that she wasn't…dead, I thought she would have been the perfect candidate to satisfy my need and it would go away. But no, it's still there, she's giving me problems, and she still has that silly little idea in her brain-damaged head about escaping this place."

Within time, his eyes met the monitor again, seeing his test-subject running; no doubt, trying to find a way out. Taking note in the woman's expression, knowing how she was determined and not willing to give up, it oddly brought out a small smile in him.

In an instant, he remembered those times, when he was right there beside her; guiding her, telling her where to go in order to escape certain death. Yeah, those were the days when she actually listened to him. Huh, where did those days go?

As his gaze remained on the screen, having those thoughts, his smile seemed a bit brighter.

"You never give up, do you love," he said softly; hinting a tone of admiration in his voice.

For a brief moment, it seemed like if he was his old-self again, still having that smile, though sadly, after a few seconds, it soon faded; his gaze now being stone cold.

"With that, it's just all the more reason to keep you here. Putting all that drive and determination would be quite useful in the testing chambers, rather than using it to try and escape," he continued; his tone quite stern.

Within that moment, he then put his hands over the key-board that was in from of him, and started to type.

"That stupid potato thinks I can't do Her job, well I'll show Her, I'll simply do what she always failed to do, and that's keeping that lady here in line, I know she wants to kill her, but I'm not too keen on the idea of killing just yet. Have to see if there's any alternatives, any helpful things I can use in order to make that woman test."

After a while of going through countless files and information, nothing really sparked his interest. Some things he came across he simply skimmed, though once when a certain file came up, he stopped and stared in confusion.

"What…what's this?"

["Testing Replacement Project"]

"Hmm…"

With nothing to say, he then put his finger over the key and hit enter.

It took a moment, but once the file was activated, a window popped up, filling the screen with information. At first glance, not much was really worth a read to him, since most of the information consisted records of countless test-subjects, stating their skills, strong points, and weakness, but, as he continued to examine, moving the down-arrow key, something interesting soon caught his eye.

"Ah, ello, what do we have here?"

Adjusting his glasses a little to get a better look, he immediately saw two pictures on the screen. Not surprising, the images shown were two robots, one labeled orange, and the other blue, what was surprising though, was how the individual robots were built, and more specifically, the purpose they were designed for. After going through more pictures and reading more in detail of the 'project', a smirk eventually formed upon his lips. To him, it was a major discovery, finding out about this, and knowing that he did it on his own, it was a plus. After all, every ounce of information he has access to, would be impossible to get if he wasn't connected to the mainframe. So, in reality, since all the info he has isn't supposed to be accessible to him, and yet he's able to access, he finds it all the more reason to be happy; being pleased with his skills, or as he tends to call himself, a 'Master Hacker'.

"Heh, so all this time she had been hiding something," he exclaimed, "Probably been planning this the moment she activated no doubt."

"Hmm…but, kind of sad really now that I think about it, I mean, after all this time, I thought she would've wanted that woman around because of her skills, but I guess, that still wasn't enough. Well, then again, it does make more sense, remembering how she was deactivated by her, which there by explains the whole, 'I want to kill her business.' she had going on about. Though….building robots specifically for testing…in order to replace the humans…to replace her? Is…is it even right to do that?"

In an instant, he thought about how he tried that himself; making the other robots test in the chambers, it didn't turn out so good, but, then again, those robots were built for different purposes, and these robots were designed to do just what he needed; test. To him, not only was this a discovery, finding out Her plans, but, prior to his need, these robots were a gold-mine; in the end, there would be no more problems, and he would have the satisfaction he was looking for. Yes, it was all too tempting, especially now since he knew where the robots were being stored until further notice.

Though, before he could act upon the temptation, he suddenly felt as if some-one was pulling him back; making his mind drift back to her. Once more, he was at war with himself. After all, unlike Her now, he admired the woman's skills, loving how quick she would solve tests, pressing buttons to get to the next chamber, having that determined expression on her face as she ran, and even the way she would use the portal-device in her hands. To sum it up, she was the perfect test-subject, sure she's being a bit of a pain right now, but, maybe…just maybe, if he could get her to behave some-how, she would be perfect; or, will be perfect, if he were to proceed with his goal.

Bottom line, he was caught, having to make a decision; it was either kill her, or keep her.

Truthfully, he was leaning more to kill, but again, some-one or some-thing was trying to tell him otherwise.

After looking away from the monitor, thinking for a while, he then eventually gave a sigh; reaching to a decision.

"You know, maybe it's for the best….for science that is…" he said, gazing back at the screen.

"No! Don't do this! You need her!"

He then pushed a key and everything that was opened instantly closed.

At this point, the itch was starting to become unbearable, it needed to be scratched.

"I don't need her after all, why go through all the trouble of trying to make her perfect if I can just get what I need instantly with these robots. HA, why did I even consider the thought that she can even be perfect, after all she's fat, selfish, bossy, and is probably good friends with that potato by now. Both of them plotting… scheming, trying to take me down. Heh heh, well, sorry to disappoint you love, but I'm one step ahead of you; for I'm going to kill you before you even get the chance to set foot into my lair, or even try to escape."

As his eyes were locked on the screen, he instantly saw that the woman finally completed the test he'd laid out for her. And, even though he had a mild satisfaction of seeing the sight, the feeling still ate away at him, and his mind was still set on his current decision. Now, the only thing to think about was just how he was going to kill her. So, he thought until he had everything figured out, he would make up tests for her to do as they go in the mean-time. Of course, to boot, he would also have to keep an eye on her since she's still thinking of escaping.

"Grrr…all this work I have to do. This woman really is a pain. Once a friend, and now is my greatest nemesis…."

"She's still your friend…."

"….honestly, I feel like all this could have been avoided if she just told me about how she had a history with Her from the beginning. But no, she kept me in the dark, I end up taking all the damage when that computer activated, and I almost died a few times. I basically sacrificed everything for that woman, only to be stabbed in the back by her wanting to leave and teaming up with that bloody machine. She betrayed me…."

"No…you betrayed her…."

"It will be a huge relief once she's gone. I won't miss her…."

"You will miss her..."

"…and I won't be sorry."

You will be sorry…"