**Note** In this oneshot based on a different universe, Kaname and Zero are both human just as Yuki was. There is no Hunters and vampires. Cross Academy is a school divided into two classes based upon the schedules given to the students which are handed out due to a sort of system similar to a lottery.
A New Hope
Over the obnoxious taste of the scalding coffee upon his tongue, Kaname could discern the fresh taste of his salty tears upon his taste-buds. The overzealous emotions that grasped his heart shuddered like the blinds of an open window, bringing him along with the horrible sensation even as he refused to bare his soul so openly in public. He hadn't realized how long he'd been seated in the air-conditioned coffee-shop until the benevolent barista questioned the eerily silent male. Her voice possessed an undercurrent of concern as she fidgeted by his side, unsure of herself as she prepared to speak and question him on his pitiful lack of company. Kaname chose to ignore her in the meantime.
He wasn't expecting anyone... But then and again... he didn't have anyone.
He glanced outside the wall of windows towards the cloudy city, the towering structure of Cross Academy standing atop a flowery hill that overlooked the town's bustling streets. He came here to this location for some isolation from the rest of the pitying world, as if he hopelessly expected a savior to come and rescue him from his grief.
This had always inevitably been his damned fate for some morbid reason, as though he were cursed by every single deity in existence. He had never desired for anything besides his precious Yuki's happiness, but now even his dear, sweet girl had abandoned him to this savage world. She, who had brought a brilliant smile to his face, had left him. However, Kaname knew it hadn't been her choice. It was just the way fate had guided them, and it was another ruthless future to cope with. It was another death left to grieve over, and another death left to become seared into his mind. He feared he would never heal from this desolation.
He passed a cursory glance towards the other occupants of the coffee-shop, aware of some of the not-so-subtle glances directed towards his handsome visage. There were others who paid no mind to him, some who were chatting animatedly amongst each other with contented grins on their faces. Those were the people who enjoyed life and seemingly had no worries.
"Excuse me. Your name is Kaname, right? I saw it on your coffee cup." The youthful barista clad in sky blue garments stood before him, unaware of the soundless tears that were slowly but surely creating their somber path down his pale peach cheeks. "Yes," he answered evenly, using his ebony bangs to conceal his gaze as he shot her an apologetic grin and quickly pretended to respond to a work text. The barista, however, was extremely stubborn, irritatingly so.
"Is there something you need?" he questioned as he continued to gaze into the bright screen of his phone, his voice steely yet gentle at the same moment. It was a shock to him as well to hear that his voice had remained composed and steady despite the conflicting sorrow that ached in his nerves.
"I just wanted to know if you were alright. You've been here for quite some time and you seem somewhat... sad?" she responded bashfully, playing with the ruffles of her snowy apron. She had seen the young male enter the coffee-shop and she was immediately attracted to him, finding his cryptic carmine gaze alluring and holding an innate seductive gleam within those downcast irises that she was unable to resist. But even so, she felt concerned for his well-being, not because of his beautiful looks, but because of his seemingly exhausted behavior that came with an aura of sorrow.
"Yes, I'm alright. Thank you for asking. I merely came for some peace and quiet," he said, vaguely emphasizing the final words of his statement as he responded to a text from Aido that was nothing more than an apologetic lecture and an urgent need to see the young male.
The barista finally yielded, offering a concerned and sheepish smile as she nodded and gave her polite farewells. She promptly vanished behind the counter, granting her assistance to the other patrons that arrived for their drinks and miniature meals.
Kaname dropped his phone on the open seating beside him, remaining silent within his booth as he traced the curling patterns lining the mahogany wood with a slender fingertip. His bitter coffee had gone cold by now, the paper cup losing its warmth from the long hours he spent here. From the crack of dawn to the overcast morning in which the sun attempted to break through, he had been here, lost in his musings.
He glanced towards the opposite end of his booth, almost expecting Yuki to be sitting there rattling on about some concept or another with her precious enthusiastic voice. She was always so endearingly loud, so enthusiastic about every little thing she accomplished, as though one minor achievement meant the world to her. She always found her goals to be wonderful things, beautiful things that created every perfect aspect about her. That was something Kaname truly admired. Yuki had seen pieces of her soul in everything she did; her unparalleled effort, her wonderful bravery and courage. Even at the loss of their parents, she stood strong despite the cascading rivulets of tears that streamed down her cheeks.
"Ah, Zero! Do you want your regular?!" The cheerful barista greeted a young handsome male as he stepped into the coffee-shop, not even noting the pained expression lining his masculine features as he approached the counter. The smile he wore was so devastatingly fake, but it seemed Kaname had been the only one to note it. But yet, he paid no mind to it as the mere discernment seemed inconsequential in his tormented mind. He was too lost in his own musings to take into consideration anything around him.
"Yes," Zero replied, his voice serious with an undercurrent of maturity and weariness lingering within his despondent tone. The barista seemed to be oblivious to this as she hadn't voiced her concerns, turning her back to him and proceeding to make his daily coffee out of habit.
For a fleeting moment, Zero's passing gaze flitted across Kaname, capturing a glimpse of radiant chocolate tresses and crestfallen carmine irises. The delicate yet firm jaw was clenched, seemingly moist beneath the dim and subtle glow of the lights. Zero could've sworn he saw a tear plummeting to his lap, soaking the material of his luxurious and cream-colored trousers.
"Here you go, Ze-ro! Enjoy!" the barista chirped, grinning childishly as she placed Zero's steaming beverage on the marble counter before him. Zero smiled, leaving behind a considerate tip before seating himself at his usual booth beside a polished window. From this angle, it was rather easy to catch occasional glimpses of the male seated a short ways away from him. However, he found it difficult to care at the moment, almost feeling numb on the inside like a flower withering away.
It was a web of pain and agony that curled throughout his figure, a bruise upon his soul that would take a while to fade, but he knew it would only be ripped open into a fresh wound eventually. It was too terribly easy to mask the pain, to hide all that was constantly seized by his own desperate fingertips and ram it behind his indifferent mask.
He sighed, taking a scalding gulp of his coffee and forcing it down his throat, releasing a pained breath as he swallowed and mildly relieved the lump constricting his airways. If there was anything to distract him from the grief, he would take it, he would accept it gratefully. Whether it were torture, death, or a gift of happiness, it wouldn't matter. Anything would be better than the present he knew, than the aching throb of loss twining through his cells. He glanced once more at the male seated at his own isolated booth.
Kaname restrained his heartbroken sobs, a hand weakly yet forcefully tracing the patterns of the mahogany wood as a pathetic distraction, his opposite hand placed over his mouth to conceal his trembling lips. It was difficult to sustain the collected facade of his, the one that was so carefully fabricated and constructed to suit the desires of others. He was meant to be strong and powerful, influential in the world they lived in. He couldn't afford to lose all that he had so cleverly built, but yet, what was there to lose when the one he truly cared for had left him?
A strangled sob filtered past his lips and he cursed himself for the painfully loud noise that prompted him to lean back firmly against the booth and attempt to regain the lost control over his body. He knew he should leave, but he feared getting caught in the act of crying like a neglected child. He closed his moist eyes, his lean frame trembling imperceptibly as he clutched the hem of his dark blue button-up.
The momentary display of weakness hadn't gone unnoticed by Zero and the young teen couldn't help but feel that he should help this man. He appeared so lost and broken, much like he felt at the moment. With a bold thought, Zero rose from his seat and slid casually into the booth Kaname occupied. He rested his forearms against the glossy wood, crossing one leg over the other as he spared a short glance towards the polished surface of the table. He cupped his hands around the miniature paper cup in his hands, his thumbs gliding absently along the heated exterior.
The sudden movement caused Kaname to jolt in his seat and his immediate reaction was to wipe away his tears with a less than graceful sniff and clearing of his throat. The mahogany wood that he was entranced by was moist with his tears that he had not succeeded in catching with his lap that was also damp with the evidence of his sorrow. "Is there something you need?" he inquired in clipped tones, somehow managing to speak somewhat weakly from behind the lump in his throat.
"Are you alright?" Zero asked, looking at the handsome male before him with gentle lilac gems, seeming unperturbed by Kaname's cold inquiry.
The question caught Kaname off-guard and he was left speechless for several seconds, staring in awe at the amethyst jewels crowned by silver lashes that were filled with sincere concern and nothing more.
"I- No...," Kaname uttered quietly, bowing his head and folding his hands tensely on his lap. To be frank, Kaname felt so painfully alone that the presence of the exotic male seemed like a wonderful comfort. At first glance, he seemed quiet and his gaze spoke of gentleness and fragments of caring. The mere traits were so similar to Yuki that another miniscule fracture tore at his heart, born of a worthless hope that everything would be alright.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
It was so foreign to him, so odd to speak so freely about his troubles with someone he recently met. It felt abnormal, yet reassuring, as though the secrets he spoke to this man would forever be kept secrets. "I don't know...," Kaname responded sincerely, prompting a soothing and encouraging smile to flutter across the silver-haired youth's features.
"It's okay to tell me anything... It's okay to tell me whatever you like. I saw how miserable you seemed, and to be honest, it felt like I had to sit here. It was impossible to resist sitting down and just talking with you, as if I could actually help. I don't mind sitting here in silence if that's what you'd like," Zero stated, his voice comforting and tranquil, gentle like the zephyrs of spring, yet hardened like iron.
"Th... Thank you... It's just... I recently lost someone special to me. No, very special. She was what created my existence," Kaname said, a reminiscent smile crossing his features at the pacifying thought of Yuki. "She... died in a car accident not just a few days ago. She was returning home from visiting our adoptive father... She was gone just as quick as she had left... I-I never got to say goodbye, I never got to be with her in her dying moments, and I never got to see her happy in the future she so desperately strove for... " The pauses between Kaname's words were overwhelmed by heartfelt sobs, each one tearing through Zero like a bullet.
Zero frowned, the situation seeming too similar to his as he felt a twinge of sympathy throbbing in his numb heart. "I understand." He certainly did... He understood what Kaname was feeling, he understood the situation, he understood him.
Tears flooded Kaname's eyes once more, threatening to spill over the boundaries of his dark eyelashes as he pressed the heels of his palms against his reddened eyes. The sheer misery Zero captured within those hypnotizing vermillion irises was enough to invoke a twinge of protectiveness in his own broken soul.
"Listen... I understand what this feeling of loss is like... I, too, lost someone who held a piece of my heart. It's difficult, and it's painful... Out of all the things I lost in my life, I always hoped she would never leave me. I feel so useless without her... She gave me something beautiful, that something was warmth. It was something I needed, something I desperately craved. It's stupid, I know, but throughout all the suffering, I had no one. I lost my twin, my mother and father, all because of some crazed woman who I honestly I have no idea where she is."
Kaname listened with wide eyes, the tears spilling and finding their refuge upon his cheeks reddened with emotion. In Zero's eyes, he seemed like a small child, hopelessly curled into his own shell as he sat alone in this booth. His eyes were wide with innocence and despair, something Zero seemed to treasure within his heart. He wanted to help this man, the man who seemed so lost and sad, like a small child seeking for love.
"She had always been by my side, always had been there for me, always with me throughout the restless nights when nobody else would dare to care. I know how this painful grief feels... There's always going to be that one person who's been beside you, always that once person who never once hated you and accepted your flaws. That person will always be essential to your life..."
Yuki….
Kaname lowered his head, his shoulders trembling with the unremitting sorrow that coursed through his blood. His heart fractured, rupturing and beginning to collapse beneath the suffocating grief. Many people have said that others can die from a broken heart, and for a brief moment, Kaname believed he was one of those people.
"I... miss the girl who was always there for me. I miss the one who never let me fall. She was like a warm light in the distance, as though she were only meant for me," Zero stated with a fond smile, aware that his eyes were stinging with newborn tears. A fresh and raw pain seared his soul, a physical and emotion agony winding throughout his collapsing frame. "But, I know she's probably happier wherever she is... I sincerely believe she's looking out for me."
Kaname frowned, unable to think the same of Yuki. He never thought about it in such a delightful way, never thought about Yuki guiding him down the right path. "How… are you coping with it?" Kaname questioned, tilting his head to the side like an inquiring child. His eyes were still gleaming with tears, ones that were still left to shed and others that would never fade away as long as he thought about her existence.
"I'm not," Zero answered sincerely. "I'm definitely not." His voice quivered as a stray tear fell from the lower curve of his lashes. He averted his gaze for a brief second, fearing that his world would shatter if he dared to make eye-contact with the one who truly seemed to understand him at the moment. "But my only comfort is knowing that she wanted me to live... Truth be told, I wanted to die... so many times. It seemed like a welcoming fate back then, but she had made me realize it wasn't something I could simply do... I needed her to help me keep on living and I still do, but I promised her. I promised her I would live."
Kaname instinctively reached forward, his hands settling upon the silken ones of the beautiful male seated before him. He listened to the quivering voice that craved for the presence of the one who brought light to his world, and he also seemed to shatter beneath the strain of such sorrowful amethyst eyes. They were like brilliant stars, surviving off of sorrow, but still prospering nonetheless.
"I... will never forget her," Zero whispered, welcoming the warm contact of Kaname's fingers. "I remember the night when my parents and twin were murdered. I was the only unfortunate survivor, and I don't even know why I lived... When the police arrived, I hadn't responded to any of their questions, I didn't say anything. I felt so numb inside, so broken that everything that once seemed perfect in my life was just a distant promise. My only possible guardian was my uncle, Toga Yagari, but he's not even my biological uncle." Zero spoke with a wistful tone, gazing down at the coffee cup confined between his shaking palms that were tenderly being held between another pair of warm ones. It was difficult to restrain his emotions, and even more difficult to delve deeper into his blood-stained memories.
Kaname gazed upon the youthful teen sitting before him, examining the flawless strands of metallic silver that ghosted across a glistening set of lavender eyes. The wisteria jewels that caressed the edges of black pupils were cast into a sea of sorrow, and he was slowly drowning, drowning in Zero's never-ending misery.
"I've lived with my uncle since then, and he did everything he could to fix the scar of the memory. But it was never enough. I felt so weak and worthless, as if I could've stopped the murder of my family. It was a stupid thought, I know, but I still carry that minimal guilt with me. I feel like I betrayed my family for being the only survivor... It's like a burden on my shoulders and no matter how many times I cover it with happiness or joy, it's always going to be there." Kaname squeezed Zero's hands in a gesture of comfort and sympathy, listening intently with a compassionate gaze. The emotion that shined within his vermillion irises was cast forward by unmatched sympathy and genuine care.
"Not just a few months after the massacre, my uncle had a friend come over. They work in the same business and they've known each other for years. The guy had an adoptive daughter and she was the sweetest and most innocent person I've ever met," Zero stated, an adoring smile painting his pale pink lips. "She was always so kind to me, but at first, I rejected her strongly, but she never wavered in her attempts to cheer me up. There were times when she would sleep over, and it wasn't uncommon for me to get nightmares. Sometimes, she would come into my room when she heard my restless moving and she would sit down on my bedside and hold my hand. She would just be there until I fell asleep again."
A heartbroken sob broke past the shaky confines of Zero's strength, rendering him a shattering mess of whimpers and tears. His eyes were red, glistening with a sorrow that only came with the earth-shattering sensation of loss. He bowed his head, obscuring his face from the unwavering gaze of the man before him as tear after tear fell from his eyes. His face became a battle of sorrow, wet with melancholy, and creased with despair. "I-I've known her for so long... She would visit a lot and she was someone who was so dear to me. She was my best friend and she was like a sister to me. She was always there when I needed her, you know? She... was my sweet little sister."
Kaname nodded, a trembling frown upon his lips as his own tears responded to the heartbreaking sobs spilling from Zero's lips. "It's difficult to say goodbye, isn't it?... No one can be a replacement for another person," he began, bowing his head and facing the mahogany wood beneath his lost gaze. "That's one of my few regrets... Not saying goodbye to the girl who I've loved since she was a mere infant, never being able to see her prosper in her bright future. When our parents passed, I was useless as well since we were merely children... As her older brother, I thought it was my duty to protect that precious woman. I failed her, I know, but-" Kaname faltered, a weep strangling his voice as he pressed a hand to his forehead as though the harsh pressure would cease his never-ending current of tears. "But... it doesn't stop me from trying to live, from trying to be someone amazing to her. It's all I can do now, it seems, all I can do to let myself believe I should continue living."
Zero's gaze widened in sheer awe, looking at the strong person who trembled and wept before him. Despite all the suffering he was enduring, he refused to give up. Despite the fact that the girl who he loved with all his fragmenting heart was now gone, he refused to let her death bind him to eternal misery. What his little sister was to him was a beautiful reason to live, a blooming light in the distance that was his only solace.
"You can do it," Zero blurted before he could stop himself.
Kaname froze, raising his tear-streaked face to stare at Zero in questioning. "You're someone I would really like to be... I can see it, even as you cry, what kind of strong and determined person you are. I see it in your behavior. When you truly want to do something, it becomes your mind's sole objective. You're strong and powerful, and someone who's able to conquer anything," Zero said, elaborating his previous abrupt statement in a softer and calmer voice.
The reassuring tone that wandered around Zero's tongue warmed Kaname's heart, momentarily ceasing his tears of dejection as the sweet boy who sat before him smiled beautifully. "Thank you," Kaname said, a quivering grin crossing his lips. The gorgeous expression that danced across Kaname's features seemed beautiful in Zero's eyes and he couldn't help but succumb to the undeniable longing to protect this man.
"You know, you're a strange individual," Kaname stated, a playful air gliding through his depressed heart.
The statement piqued Zero's curiosity and he straightened his posture with slender brows raised. "How so?"
"Not just anyone would sit down with a stranger and tell them their life story," Kaname said, the same grin shining upon his lips like a radiant diamond of immense value.
Zero laughed sheepishly, scratching his head and disturbing the sleek strands of silver. "Yeah, you're right, but you seem like a trustworthy person. And plus, you seemed like you needed some company." Kaname smiled weakly, a sad tinge still gleaming within his carmine gaze. "Yeah, you're right."
"Ah…." Zero gave a sigh of disappointment as he glanced at the time on his leather-banded watch. "I have to go. I'm meeting someone at Cross Academy in a few minutes." Kaname's eyes widened a fraction in surprise as he noted the thoughtful expression fluttering across the young male's expression. "I… go to school there," Kaname stated rather hesitantly. It was difficult to tell that he was a student at Cross Academy with just a blue button-up and his uniform trousers.
Zero grinned, now feeling much more comforted knowing that he wouldn't be quite alone at his new school. "That's great! I'm meeting with the Headmaster and I'm going to attend Cross Academy since my uncle recently got a job as a teacher there," Zero informed, rising from his seat followed by Kaname who forcefully swallowed his unpalatable cold coffee.
Kaname felt a hopeful twinge impale his very core, taking in every compassionate aspect that created Zero's gorgeous features. The masculine jaw, the petite nose, the perfectly sculpted lips, and the sleek strands of hair. "Then perhaps I'll see you there soon! I have some other business to attend to before I return to Cross Academy," Kaname said as he walked beside Zero towards the exit, his face now clear of moist tears.
"That sounds great!" Zero said, a joyful chuckle escaping his lips.
A brief and awkward silence passed between the both of them as they stood alone on the street. Kaname gazed at Zero with a delighted expression, feeling comfortable with his presence. He noted the faint streaks of tears that still lined his ivory skin and he instinctively rose and wiped them away with the cuff of his blue sleeve. Zero hadn't refused the action and simply let him.
"Um… If you don't mind me asking," Kaname began hesitantly, a serious expression replacing the once happy and stunning emotions.
"What is it?" Zero asked, reciprocating Kaname's actions by wiping away the remnants of his tears with his pale green blouse.
"What was the name of the girl whom you've lost?"
Zero frowned, his gaze downcast as he eyed the thin fissures that passed through the sidewalk. "Yuki. Yuki Kuran."
"Oh-" A stunned expression plastered itself upon Kaname's visage.
"What is it?" Zero asked, tilting his head to the side and dropping his hand from the edge of Kaname's jaw.
"She's my… little sister."
Zero froze, this time connecting his shocked stare with Kaname. But even after the stunned silence, Zero still grinned and released an amused laugh. "I can't believe I never connected the dots!" he exclaimed through a bout of attractive laughter that shook his broad shoulders. The sonorous chime of his voice was enough to relax Kaname.
"Ah, same as well," Kaname said, his voice soft and light. He smiled sweetly, the kind expression captivating Zero.
"Yeah. I guess I'll be seeing you later?" Zero asked hopefully, turning on his heel and casting an entrancing glance across his shoulder.
"Yes," Kaname stated with a bright smile and a charming tilt of his head. Just as Zero began walking, he called out once more. "Oh! Excuse me, may I have your name?!"
Zero halted his leisure steps, turning around at a half-angle. "Zero Kiryu. What's yours?"
"Kaname Kuran."
"Heh. I'll see you later, Kaname!"
Kaname grinned beautifully, waving goodbye to the youthful male who stringed through the now growing crowds of people.
"You too, Zero!"
Kaname departed from the coffee-shop with a light heart, feeling exalted from his temporary misery. He felt that now he could continue living with a new hope, and a stronger soul.
**Author's Note** I'd like to thank all you readers for viewing this oneshot. It was just something that came to mind and I decided to type it up. It's not edited very thoroughly save for the basic mistakes in punctuation, spelling, etc. However, I hope this was still decent and I would really appreciate reviews. Those always brighten my day.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters stated within this oneshot besides the barista. All these characters belong to the wonderful Matsuri Hino who created the Vampire Knight universe and its lovely male characters (and Yuki, of course!) I am not gaining anything from creating such a story! Please do not still this oneshot though!