Kani: It's almost 11:15 PM EST, so I'd better hurry!!! This songfic/parody is in Gonff's (one of my favorite characters) POV. It mentions things from Mossflower and Legend of Luke, so don't worry if it seems I've messed with the timeline. Oh, and the song is one of my favorites. Listen to it sometime. ~KR

Song: The Saga Begins (a parody off the song "American Pie")

Album: N/A

Artist: Weird Al Yankovic

Summary: Gonff recounts parts of his adventures with Martin.

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A long, long time ago

In Mossflower, not-so-far away

We all were under an attack

And I thought me an' myself, in the end

Could talk the Lord Verdauga into

Maybe cutting us a little slack

But his response, it didn't thrill me

Locked the larder doors an' tried to starve me

Ha! I escaped from that mess

Then into Ben Stickle I did smash

Gave him cheese an' wine from the scene

An' went back to Kotir to see the Queen

Wound up in a cell with those guards so mean

That's where I found this mouse

Oh my, my this here Martin guy

Maybe Abbey someday later; now it's jus' you an' I

We left Brockhall; I kissed Columbine bye

Sayin' "Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

"Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

Did you know this fighting mouse

Is one who's never lived in a house

Just in tents up north, he did say

Ahh, did you see him fightin' with that sling

Though he said he's never used one such thing

Yah, he's probably gonna break that thing someday

Well, he fought Tsarmina seasons ago

And I've heard how fast his sword can go

And we were trapped, it's true

So he made a way through too (Whoo!)

He was a big surprise; a real warrior ace

And the minute Dinny started off that pace

Well, I knew how that sword would race

Oh yes, before their eyes

We started singin'

My, my this here Martin guy

Maybe Abbey someday later; now it's just you and I

We left Brockhall; I kissed Columbine bye

Sayin' "Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

"Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

We finally got to Salamandastron

The Badger Lord we knew would want

To see how good visitors could be

So we met his hares and I told the tale

How without his help, Brockhall would fail

And he just might meet some family

Oh, Boar, he was impressed, of course

Could he bring balance to the war?

Alone he met with Martin

Oh, coming he forbid

Because Boar sensed within him death

But then he said "Now listen here"

"Just stick it in your little ears"

"I still will send you help"

He was singin'

My, my this here Martin guy

Maybe Abbey someday later; now it's just you and I

We left Brockhall; I kissed Columbine bye

Sayin' "Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

"Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

We caught a ship back to Mossflower's hullabaloo

'Cause Martin the Warrior wanted to

I frankly would've liked to stay

We all fought in that epic war

And it wasn't long at all before

My friend Martin fought Tsarmina an' saved the day

And in the end some otters died

Some squirrels were shot and some vermin fried

The great Mask...he was croakin'

The ballista was broken

And the badger I admire most

Met up with vermin and now he's toast

I'm still here and he's a ghost

I guess Martin'll lead us all

And I was singin'

My, my this here Martin guy

Maybe Abbey someday later; now it's just you and I

We left Brockhall; I kissed Columbine bye

Sayin' "Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

"Soon I will be comin' over nigh"

We were singin'

My, my this here Martin guy

Maybe Abbey someday later; now it's just you and I

We left Brockhall; I kissed Columbine bye

Sayin' "Soon I will be comin' over nigh"