-1Ed and Eddy on: Eurovision 2009

A/N: To those who didn't realise, last week was the Eurovision Song Contest. Norway won, with a record 387 points! For the first time in two years, a half-decent song won. And also, for the first time in half a decade, a song got the dreaded nul points. The UK, with an entry co-written by Andrew Lloyd Webber, got 173 points, and a respectable 5th place. If you want to know what the Eurovision Song Contest is, Google it.

This story is Ed and Eddy (Edd's filming/directing it) reviewing each entry (including Georgia's (the country, not the state), which withdrew due to political references. Hey, if you say "put in" the same way as Putin, people would think it's political). And if you ask, this isn't an MST. Instead, Eddy asks Ed what they thought of an entry, then gives his own views.. However, hilarity occurs, due to them getting facts wrong, and fighting over who was better, which enraged Edd.

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Silhouettes of Ed and Eddy are shown across a half dimmed room. They are visible within the darkness. The lights turn on, and they welcome their audience.

"We're rolling." Edd instructed them to start.

"I'm Ed" Ed began.

"And I'm Eddy" Eddy concluded.

"And welcome to Ed and Eddy On!"

"On what?" Ed stupidly asked.

"It's the name of the show."

"OK."

A montage then started. With some cheesy chat show-esque music being played in the background several pictures of Ed and Eddy rolled by. From a picture of them talking to a Steve Irwin look-alike, to a clip of them chatting to a group of people. It ended with a picture of Ed, and Eddy, back to back. Although a stool was visible, making Eddy seem taller. It then continued to Ed and Eddy.

Ed was fast asleep, and not even Edd's gentle murmuring could wake him up. It was only when Eddy got his chair and hit him in the shins that he woke up. He screamed in pain.

"We're rolling, Lumpy." Eddy told him.

"This week, we are reviewing the Eurovision Song Contest. Next line." Ed said through his teeth during gasps for air.

"You don't say 'Next line'. It's for the teleprompter, which our cameraman calls an 'autocue', to go to the next line." Eddy corrected his yellow friend.

"How old is that thing?" Ed questioned himself.

"Anyway, let's get this Euro-show on the road." Eddy was eager to start. "First up, is the first semi final."

"We'd like to thank Double D for telling us about this thing."

"It's a competition. A SINGING competition." Eddy, once again, corrected.

"I can sing." Ed began to sing out of tune. It was only until Eddy released a weight onto Ed that he stopped. On screen, it showed a "Technical Difficulties" card before it cut back to Ed and Eddy. Ed was now covered in bandages and even had a black eye.

"OK, let's start with the Montenegrin entry. Ed, your thought?" Eddy acted as if nothing happened.

"It was OK. Even speaking in English didn't give them what they needed to get into the final."

Eddy was silent, but ignored it. "I didn't like it. Next up is the Czechoslovakian entry."

"Eddy, it's the Czech Republic. Czechoslovakia is no longer a country" Edd corrected, again from off-screen.

"What happened to the other part?"

"It became Slovakia."

"Whatever. Ed, what do you think?"

Ed began to sing again, this time in tune. "Aven Romale! If you really wanna sing like Gypsy, sing it with me, ada dadadai..." This caused Eddy to drop another weight. This time, it missed Ed, and destroyed the table. Ed, in fear of earlier, shut up.

"I'm just lucky it got the nul points!" Eddy was smug.

"I did like what he was wearing."

"Moving on, Belgium. And if you sing, I'll lock you in Kevin's house. With him still in it!" He then faced the camera and muttered in a low voice "Slash writers, take note."

"It was awesome. How can that NOT get through? Elvis is a star, man! ELVIS. Representing Belgium. In Moscow, Russia!"

"It wasn't Elvis, he's been dead for over 30 years." Edd, again, corrected. "It was an impersonator."

"Joy-killer." Eddy muttered under his own breath. "What about Belarus?"

"It wasn't good. But it wasn't bad either."

"My thoughts exactly. I mean, 'Then you looked and saw my wings, with your eyes that never lie'. Worst line ever.

"Yup."

"What about Sweden?"

"Love it. Although when the gibberish starts, it makes me reach for earplugs, because it's SO LOUD". (Ed shouted 'SO LOUD'').

"That so called 'gibberish' is called French. It's opera" Edd was growing sick of correcting them.

"I though Oprah was a host?"

"'Opera'. 'Opera'."

"I thought 'Opera' was usually sung in Italian." Eddy was curious.

"It can be sung in other languages, now stick to the autocue. It took me a fortnight to write it down." Edd was growing furious. "Now express your thoughts on Sweden!"

"OK." Eddy was trying to cool down his enraged English, sock-headed friend. "I thought it was OK. Like Ed, I found it hard to keep my hearing when listening to opera. But I didn't put the volume to full blast."

"That wasn't me, that was Sarah." Ed corrected him.

"Whatever. Armenia?"

Ed sang again, this time it entertained Eddy. "Everybody, move your body, we are dancing nul points."

"They got points. And got through to the final."

"Oh, right. Whatever, it was OK."

"Ditto. Do you feel the same way about Andorra?"

"Yes. Definitely. Wait, what's Andorra?"

"Andorra's a country, sandwiched by Spain and France."

"I fancy a sandwich."

"You'll get one once you've finished."

"If you find this irritating, why can't you stop the camera?" Eddy was curious.

"There isn't much tape left, so I have to do it all on one tape. That way, I don't have to load some more when we run out. The only time I stopped was when Ed was injured. Now can we continue?"

"It was good. Should've gone through" Ed sped through.

"Same here. How about Switzerland?" Eddy also sped through.

"It was great, but horrible live."

"Same."

"Please stop going so quickly. I can't understand what you're saying." Edd told them to stop.

"We were both agreeing that Switzerland sounded crap live." Eddy told him.

Edd was prepared, so he shouted a random thing over the swear. In this case, he shouted "Beep." Eddy ignored this, however.

"Moving on… How about Turkey?"

"Aren't they the Eurovision's version of Man U?"

"Probably."

"Oh, then it's a great song. As I like Manchester United."

"Ed, this isn't soccer. This is Eurovision. Stick to the script. Or the teleprompter."

"What about you?" Ed said robotically.

"Meh. Didja like Israel's entry?"

"Meh."

"Well two say meh. How about Bulgaria"

"Belarusian wannabes this year. It also made no sense."

"I hear ya on that one" Ed and Eddy high fived, but ended up missing Eddy's palm, and he ended up hitting Eddy. "Ow." His voice, due to his head being stuck in Ed's hand, was now muffled. "OK, how about Iceland?" Eddy pulled himself out. "Smells like cheese."

"Iceland was alright. Quite good for a second placer." Ed was relaxing.

"It's becoming a ballad fest, now. What about Macedonia?"

"Eddy, there's two Macedonias. One in Greece, the other a country. The country's called Former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia to avoid confusion." Edd corrected him.

"Fine, What about FYROM (Eddy pronounced it as Fie-rom)?"

"Meh."

"Same."

"This is going by very quickly." Ed was bored.

"Romania?"

"Not as good as I expected it."

"Yeah, I got that feeling too. I mean, I heard it was rock. It was about as rocky as The Queen. Not Queen, but that lady in charge of England."

"Eddy, I don't know which part of that sentence to correct first…"

"Shut up. Ed, didja like Finland?"

"They lost control, and they're falling. Falling down." Ed half-sang the lyrics. "They didn't come 12th right?"

"Right."

"Then how come they got through?"

"Back up jury?"

"/b/lackup jury?" Ed made Eddy remember something from a previous fanfic.

"BACKUP!!! We've already done that Habbo raider thing AND got in trouble for it. So please, do not bring it up again."

"Bring what up again?"

"Gah!" Eddy was so pissed off at the moment, he couldn't use the right word. All we know is, he's planning to hit Ed with something else. "Never mind, let's just do these last 3 entries."

"Four, Eddy." Edd, the smart-aleck that he was, reminded him. "Georgia withdrew due to their entry having political undertones."

"OK. The others were OK. Including Georgia. Ed agrees, can we end it now?" Eddy rushed through.

"Might as well." And so, Edd turned off the camera, and thus ended this episode. For now…

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A/N: Yes, I might've gone back to my old ways, by putting in a few brackets, but at least there weren't as many. Next chapter will feature Ed and Eddy reviewing semi 2, and the last chapter is the Big 4, Russia, and the contest itself.

To those who were a bit disappointed at the end of the fanfic, my apologies. I know it was a bit rushed, but it'll conclude in the next chapter.