Title: Lobsters
Rating:
T
Warnings: Swearing, "Sanji's" mind turning something
innocent into yaoi XD
Pairings: You'd think ZoroxLuffy. But
really, there aren't any pairings here.
Song I listened to while
writing this: "Savin' Me" by Nickelback
Disclaimer: One
Piece isn't mine. If it was, there'd be constant ZoroLuffy shounen-ai
and the occasional ZoroLuffy yaoi adventure w
LOBSTERS
Poor Sanji. . . .
"Oi, Zoro!" Luffy called. "What are you doing with that?"
Zoro grunted. "Just playing with it."
"Oh. Haha, look, it jumped!"
"No, it just twitched. They can't jump."
Sanji paused by the door to the men's quarters. He had just been going up to the galley to begin cooking breakfast for Nami-swan, but. . . . "What the hell are they talking about?"
"Oh, oh, Zoro! Look, I have one, too."
"Yeah. I know. It's huge, I could see it while you were walking in."
"Oi, oi, we should let them play together!"
". . . whatever."
Sanji's eye twitched. "What the f--?"
"Ahahaha! They're happy. I-- ow! Zoro--!"
". . . shit. Don't move, Luffy."
"Zo--!"
"Spread your legs farther apart, damn it. I can't--"
There was a long pause. Sanji began a series of dry heaves.
"AAAAH! ZORO--!"
"There. Done. Put that away, Luffy."
"Na, I'm feeling a lot better. . . . Mou, I'm going to go give it to Sanji." Suddenly, the door swung open. "Hiya, Sanji! Look, look what I have! It's--"
Sanji began sprinting as fast as he could to the railing of the ship and threw himself, screaming, into the shark-ridden water. "YOU SICK BASTARDS!"
Luffy blinked. "What's the matter with him? Oh, well. Thanks for pulling that lobster off of my leg, Zoro!"
"Go show Nami the lobsters. I want to take a nap."
"Okay. Nami, Nami, me and Zoro found some lobsters!"
What the hell is wrong with me? TTTT