Disclaimer: *rolling her eyes* Yeah, we know, that I own nothing, don't we?

A/N: I've been planning to write something dedicated to Cal for quite a long time, 'cause he's my favourite character in the movie...OMG, I did it! I've said it!

This is how it has gone out. Enjoy :)

Yes, I know it.

I know that newspapers are going to judge the ones like me.

I know that along with all other feelings Iэm going to see hatred and contempt in people's eyes.

I know I deserve to see it.

I know I should have stayed there.

I know I should never let Rose go.

I know I should have never taken that gun.

I know I shouldn't have boarded that FRIGGIN' ship.

Titanic, Titanic, Titanic. Ship of Dreams, as I've read the description in some article in some cheap magazine. Screw you, Ship of Dreams. You've taken my money, my prestige, even my guard. I' m not the one to blame Lovejoy, but if he had moved his legs faster, he could...Damn...

And the most important thing,Ship of Dreams, is that you've taken my Rose.

Now I'm staying on board of Carpathia, left with nothing and wondering how I must live my already wasted life now.

Saved passengers around me are asking, yelling, crying. They still have hope to find their relatives, beloved, friends. They still believe.

I know my belief has died during previous cold night spent among the icebergs. My hope to meet Rose is dead.

...Rose?..

It's...it's her. I would recognize her hair, her figure among the billions of the women with the same hair and dhe is hidind, she doesn't want to be seen...

And she's alone. Is Dawson?..

No, I won't be able to come to her, to speak to her. My period of life named "Rose DeWitt Bukater" is over, as well as the period in her life named "Cal Hockley".

Or maybe, I'm just too timid. Or selfish.

Okay, Rose. I say goodbye this time. Now we will leave for ourselves, not desiring to kill each other. Moreover, I still don't see Dawson here, perhaps, in a minute he will appear, take your hand and you will smile to him...

Walking in the direction from her, I can feel a gaze on my back. Fine, now you see me too. I know what you're probably thinking, Rose.

You're an asshole, Caledon Hockley.

And you're undoubtetly right, my dear Rose.