Denial.

As Draco looked up at the blank ceiling in his dormitory, he wondered about his future. A few hours back in Hogwarts and his emotions were already in conflict. How was it, that after years of loathing Harry Potter, he was now seeing him in a completely different light. He told himself it wasn't love. How could it be love? He'd hated the boy for years. Harry Potter was the opposite of everything he had believed in all his life.

But how could this be? It must be his hormones playing tricks on him. But then again… maybe not. Hormones didn't explain why Potter's ruffled hair appeared attractive to Draco all of a sudden. Was it the light in the Great Hall that made his skin look so flawless and smooth? How was it that Draco's stomach turned every time he heard Potter's voice echoing down the staircase as he returned to his Common Room?

Draco's feelings had never betrayed him like this before.

For the first time, Draco saw himself for who he truly was. Behind his cold, sneering façade, he saw his own vulnerability. A teenage crush! He imagined his father's face if he heard that his own son had fell for Harry Potter! The Chosen One! The one who killed Slytherin's Basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets! The one who'd prevented the Dark Lord's return on several occasions, eventually overcoming him, the greatest wizard of all time!

And worst of all, the reason why Draco had to re-do his last year at Hogwarts.

Yet Draco could not help feeling an attraction towards The Boy Who Lived. He might be the saviour of the wizarding world, but contrary to popular belief, Draco had actually begun to admire Harry for a while now. And nobody had guessed.

He had to admit that this was mainly thanks to Pansy. She kept up his 'straight image' as he liked to call it. Not that she had noticed or anything. In fact at times, Draco really felt quite sorry for the silly girl. After all, he wasn't totally devoid of emotion, he didn't want to upset her, but it was just… he couldn't give up the pretence after all this time. He couldn't show any signs of weakness, because despite secretly hating the whole 'pureblood' notion for a few years now, he was still a Malfoy.

And Malfoys were not weak.

Yet in this past week, he had felt more powerless and alone than he had ever been. Never had he experienced this before - he suddenly was unpopular. He was no longer the Prince of Slytherin that he had been. Blaise Zabini. That bastard, had taken over his unofficial title. Malfoy no longer held much influence in the Slytherin Common Room. It was Blaise, Blaise this and Blaise that. The lust emanating from the crowd of girls that were always following him was enough to convince even Snape that someone was brewing a love potion… All the girls adored him, and probably some of the boys as well.

He wasn't even that bloody attractive!

But Draco understood why. He knew that having a Death Eater family was no longer the status symbol it once was. Since Voldemorts downfall, there'd been a huge upheaval in the Slytherin House. Traitors, the lot of them, acting like a group of Hufflepuff wimps, pretending to be squeaky clean when they used to be just like him, the lot of them! Even that silly Pansy Parkinson, who was now completely ignoring him. There went his 'straight guy' cover.

His mind had drifted… but it seemed that he'd come full circle. He was now back to his original thought. Harry. And him. Together. He would never have thought that those words would be placed in that order… but now they seemed… right. He knew, instinctively, that it would never work, not in a million years. Even if he plucked up the courage and asked Harry - even if - by some miraculous twist of fate Harry did feel the same way, it would never work. Since when had he started thinking of him as 'Harry' and not 'Potter' anyway?

Draco was starting to feel depressed. He tried to forget about it. He tried in vain. He imagined what that freckled, red-haired maniac and the bloody interfering mudblood would think. He knew Harry couldn't bear anyone who didn't get on with his friends. And he knew his friends felt exactly the same about Harry.

But even that would be nothing compared to his parents reactions. Well… mainly his father. The downfall of the Dark Lord hadn't lessened Lucius Malfoy's strict dominance over Draco. In fact, it had gotten progressively worse since he had failed to kill Dumbledore. How could Lucius ever have expected that of him! Draco had never been great pals with the old man… but Dumbledore had showed Draco, even when he was about to die, the great power of generosity, of love. At least the old man had lived a long and happy life - unlike Draco. Draco knew, from the very start, that he couldn't kill Dumbledore. His half-hearted attempts had only managed to hospitalize two of Hogwarts' students, it was no wonder his father was angry with him.

And his mother…he knew that his mother expected grandchildren. Draco snorted. The idea was laughable! How could he possibly devote his life to another, when he couldn't even devote it to himself? No, he would certainly not let that happen. He knew it would disappoint his mother…but she was well used to disappointment by now. All his life, Draco had been overshadowed by someone or other. Mostly Harry Potter, which made it even more unusual for him to fall madly in love with the boy. 'Infatuation, not love' he told himself, albeit rather feebly. Infatuation made him sound like some sort of loved-up, psychosexual teenage girl. It made him sound like Pansy, he thought, causing him to laugh out loud. No, he wasn't infatuated, but could he dare use the word love?

Surely not.

He knew he was living in some kind of silly alternative universe, where there was the tiniest chance that Harry might like him. He knew it was an utter impossibility but that didn't make it any easier for him every morning when he sat down on the Slytherin table and saw him, some twenty metres away, chatting, enjoying himself, laughing.

While inside, Draco was crying.

A/N: Hope you liked my first chapter, more coming very soon I promise :D Thanks go to my wonderful beta xoGinevraMalfoyox whom I would not be able to live without :D This is my first ever fanfic so please review even if you hate it! You know you want to….