AN: Happy birthday, Cam! This is for you! :D
R&R!
HeartForSoul
Oddly enough, when it happened, it was raining. It wasn't like in the movies, when there is a huge downpour and the actors have to shout over the large amount of thunder to be heard. Nor was it a storm of lightning, lighting the stage of a dramatic scene.
No. It was a light rain. Drizzling, if you will. There was no lightning, there was no thunder, and there was no sun peaking behind the clouds. Hermione wasn't sure why, but the whole scene painted the perfect picture of loneliness. The perfect scene for what would happen next.
It all started with a look and it ended with the rain.
Hermione Granger did not like the Slug Club. It was a ridiculous club put together so that a teacher could live vicariously through his students or their families and boast about it at any social gathering he happened to have at the moment.
She was positive this was the absolute worst party she'd been to in her whole life and her date-if you could call it that-was incorrigible. So far, he'd boasted about himself, insulted her, and tried to touch her butt. It was a horrible night and she still had at least an hour at the party.
"Honestly, Cormac," his name made her want to gag a bit, "I'm fine. It's much warmer right here." Cormac was insisting that it was cold and was attempting to drag her to the fireplace where she was positive she'd seen a sprig of mistletoe.
"Come on, Granger," she grimaced at the use of her last name. She was pretty sure that it was only because he couldn't remember her first.
With the build of a quidditch player, Cormac managed to maneuver Hermione the few feet to the fireplace. He smirked, "Isn't it much-hold on a second!" He was looking up and Hermione was terrified of what she'd see. She'd avoided it once, but twice? She wasn't sure could handle it. "Mistletoe! Ah, well! Respect the traditions and all that," he grinned.
Hermione's eyes widened as he swung an arm around her and pulled her closely. It seemed there was no escape until-
"Oh now, Severus!" A rather loud voice called out, causing McLaggen to pause in his actions. He still had his arm around Hermione and their faces were mere inches from each other, but he had turned to see the commotion.
The voice had erupted from, what appeared to be, a tipsy Slughorn. Slughorn said something else that Hermione wasn't paying attention to. She was focused on the figure standing next to Slughorn.
She recognized who it was instantly. It's not everyday that you see hair the color of the sun. His profile was facing her as he looked on while Snape said something in return to Slughorn's comment. He looked dreadful. He was pale, the kind of pale that makes you think of corpses and albinos. He looked exhausted, dark rings rimmed the edge of his eyes as he blinked tiredly from what could only be the insomnia haunting him. Maybe it was nightmares, she mused to herself, though she was starting to wonder why she suddenly decided she should pay so much attention to him.
She supposed it was just some bad cold that he'd caught, and she stuck with that idea firmly until he turned and saw her. His eyes caught her attention first. The silver orbs looked surprised. She was standing about three meters away from him, so she could see his expressions clearly.
When the shock had worn off from catching her looking, his eyes changed drastically. There was some emotion Hermione wasn't sure about... anguish? Looking to his other features Hermione realized that there was a scowl on his face. He sneered at her and Cormac, shaking his head.
She didn't hear what happened next, but the connection between them broke and Draco was being escorted out. "Well," a voice broke into her thoughts, "Where were we?"
Hermione ducked out of Cormac's arms right before his lips reached her. She grimaced awkwardly as he shot her a confused look. "Er...bathroom."
Cormac looked disgruntled at being interrupted, but at her comment he grinned. "Oh! Not a fan of PDA, darling? That's fine. We can continue this wherever you like."
Hermione gawked at the idiot right in front of her.
"No need to stare, I'll be sure to show you everything later," he winked.
Hermione grimaced. She couldn't help the word vomit that came out next. "Are you stupid? That's the most idiotic thing you've said all night! I don't want to kiss you, nor do I want to be near someone who assumes I think so highly of them, when in fact they're wrong! Believe me. If I had the choice between a locking lips with an ogre or you, I'd be making good friends with Shrek" She huffed and stormed away, her dress flying behind her.
"Stupid...arrogant...prick..." Hermione grumbled, walking down the corridor to the nearest bathroom. She was going to continue her complaining when the sound of voices quited her.
"Just leave me alone..." The first voice was obviously male. Hermione wondered what he was doing in the girl's bathroom.
The second was a quiet tone, although the voice sounded quite offended. "I know that-"
"I said JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" The male voice was now shouting at the second voice, which sounded female, and Hermione gaped. How rude! She was a prefect, she could stop this!
"Hey!" Hermione said, barging in when she heard wailing. "Listen here- Malfoy?" She said the name as if it was something incredulous. "What are you doing in here?"
"I could ask you the same question, mudblood," Malfoy spat, splashing some water on his face before he turned around. "What, exactly, do you want?"
"I want to know what you're doing in here and who you screamed at. It's not polite to scream at people, they-"
"Myrtle hardly qualifies as a person," he rolled his eyes.
Hermione copied the motion. "She has feelings-"
"Too many," the blonde said, interrupting her yet again.
Hermione looked the blonde over as he faced the sinks once more. She was closer now than she'd been at the party, and she could see him better. His hair was in disarray, looking as if someone had been gripping it tightly. He had this sneer on his face and he was gripping the sink out of anger.
"What do you want, mudblood?" He asked, slowly turning to look at the prefect.
"What are you doing in the girl's bathroom?"
"Answering a question with a question," he shook his head. "This one is closer. Got a problem, Granger?"
"Yes," Hermione took a step forward, "I do."
"What?" Malfoy asked, taking a step forward as well. The two were about a meter away.
"You. What are you doing in here? Because you sure as hell aren't going to the bloody bathroom!"
Malfoy raised a brow, "Watch your language, Granger." When she didn't comment he sighed exasperatedly. Not seeing any excuses, he decided to tell the truth. "I came to get away."
"From what? The party you weren't invited to?" Hermione asked sarcastically.
"From Snape!" He shouted. His shook his head and gripped his hair, causing it to become even more unruly.
"Why do you need to get away?" Hermione asked, surprised at the tone.
"Granger, I don't need your sympathy cards," he spat. "Just stay away from me."
He was about to leave when Hermione moved and blocked his path. "Who said I cared enough to give you sympathy, Malfoy? Now answer the question."
"I'll answer it if you move out of the way," he growled. With one sidestep he looked her straight in the eye. "He wants to help."
He walked away when he finished and Hermione called after him. "Wait! Help with what?" He didn't answer. He just kept walking.
The next time Hermione saw him was the following day in the Great Hall. She hadn't bothered to return to Slughorn's 'party', instead attempting to follow Malfoy. He lost her after only a couple of corridors though, leaving her to try and find her way back to the common room. This had both pros and cons. The pro being that Ron was convinced she'd been out with Cormac all night, the con was that Harry had seen the quarrel with McLaggen, and he kept asking her where she'd been.
She'd been thinking about Malfoy's words all night, barely getting any sleep. She couldn't help but wonder what kind of help could be bad. Help he didn't want. It definitely wasn't homework or lessons. Maybe he was going through some hard times and didn't want any help because he figured it'd make him seem too girly. That's why he'd said he didn't want her sympathy! She felt a tad guilty about her response to that, but was very relieved to find that she'd figured it out.
She was 100% positive that was the answer until she saw him in the Great Hall. She hadn't noticed him at first, taking a seat across from Katie Bell, a good distance away from Ron, but close enough to Cormac to make him jealous. She had looked up to comment on the food when she met the blonde's stormy eyes.
He'd been staring for a long moment, but unlike when people are usually caught staring he continued the action, merely raising his brow. He looked concentrated, like he was searching for something. He looked like he was sick, not physically though, like he was so tired of something.
The Slytherin next to him made some comment and without looking away he replied. Finally, after what felt like ages of being analyzed, he got up, grabbed his bag, and walked out.
Hermione followed him. She wanted to confirm her theory. She wanted to know what exactly it was that had made him so odd lately.
This time, he didn't seem to realize that she was following him and he walked outside, dropping his bag in a dark alcove along the way.
Remember the rain we talked about? That drizzle? Well, it's introduced right here.
"Malfoy," Hermione alerted him to her presence.
He had his head facing skyward, his eyes closed. "Granger," he sighed. "How did I know I'd see you so soon?"
"I'm inquisitive," Hermione replied.
"That's just a nice way of saying that you're stubborn," Malfoy said, opening his eyes to watch the drizzling take place.
"Malfoy, what happened?"
"You said something, and I turned it into an insult. This is the part where you either insult me back, if you can, or storm away angrily. Take your pick," he looked over at her.
"I asked you a question. What happened to you? You're acting different than you usually do. It's in your eyes-"
"Eyes are windows to the soul," he whispered.
Hermione was about to furiously point out that he'd interrupted her, but his comment made her pause. "Well if I looked through these windows, what would I see?" She asked, just as quiet.
"That's quite a personal question, Granger," he whispered again.
"Alright," she nodded. "Well how about this one... Why is your soul so frustrated?"
He stopped his staring contest with the sky and looked over at her. "How would you know what my soul was feeling?"
"I've spent a tiny portion of time looking into those windows," Hermione said, their eyes meeting.
"Your soul seems too curious for it's own good," he muttered. "It also looks pretty hurt."
"Yeah, well your soul doesn't exactly seem like it's fine and dandy."
"I didn't just see curiosity," he switched the subject back to her. "Regret?"
"I'm sorry," Hermione wasn't sure why she'd said it, until she remembered her previous thoughts. She hurried to explain. "I was rude in the bathroom last night. I'd... I'd just been harassed. I sort of took it out on you."
Malfoy laughed humorously. "Yes, I noticed the predicament McLaggen was hoping would turn into something more. What? Not happy the failed keeper was sexually interested in you?"
"I wouldn't call him a keeper," Hermione scoffed. "And no, I was not happy at all. That wasn't the first time that night, either."
He rolled his eyes. "McLaggen is an idiot. He gets a chance with an actually intelligent girl and throws it away."
Hermione was about to reply when his words made her pause. "Wait... Does this not seem odd? We're talking. So far, no insults, and you just complimented me."
"You didn't need to apologize, Granger," he looked away from the long eye contact, back to the sky, not bothering to answer her. "You could say that I wasn't exactly a gentleman."
Hermione watched him as he watched the sky. His hair looked like hundreds of white beads had settled on it, the water droplets clinging to it in a final act of desperation before they hit the ground, ending their short life. He had his eyes closed again. She sighed. "What's your secret Malfoy?"
He was quiet for a long moment and Hermione was positive he wouldn't answer, until... "I can't say."
Hermione perked up. That was at least something. "You're dying to tell someone, though." Hermione could read frustration and anxiousness on his face.
"What would you say the definition of secret is?"
Hermione was taken aback by the question, but answered anyways. "Something you don't tell anyone."
"Exactly. It's not a secret if you tell anyone. Some secrets you just can't tell people."
"Maybe you can't tell people. Maybe just one person?" She suggested.
He looked to Hermione, "You have no idea how badly I want to-" He stopped.
"Tell me?" She asked, sensing something else in his eyes.
"No. How badly I want to make you understand," he took a step, now standing in front of her.
Being half a foot taller than her, she craned her neck to keep their gazes locked.
"Help me understand," she pleaded. "Malfoy, I don't know what it is, but you've got to let me help you."
"I can't," he said, agony in his voice and eyes.
"Please," she whispered, reaching up to grip his shoulders.
"Granger," he said, a single tear slipped from his eyes. "You don't get it. He will kill me."
"Who?" She asked softly, knowing exactly who 'he' was.
"You know who," Hermione would've laughed at his answer if it wasn't so serious.
"Why can't you let me help? We can protect you," she begged.
"No one can help me now," he shook his head. "I am just a puppet in his sick game, and I'm playing by his rules."
"You can't quit?"
"The game I'm playing doesn't have that option."
"How can I help you?" She asked, eyes tearing up.
"Just remember how my soul looks now, don't let anything change this memory." He looked as if he was about to walk away, but then, at the last moment, he leaned in and kissed her. On instinct, Hermione closed her eyes and reciprocated. It was brief, and it promised nothing yet held so much emotion she had to make sure both feet were firmly on the ground.
When he pulled back, her eyes were still closed as he whispered in her ear. "And try not to wash your windows too much..."
It all started with a look and it ended with the rain.
AN: I hope you guys liked it! :)
HeartForSoul
