Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VI is in no way mine. I just own this short story on it and that is all.
Awakening
Terra Branford felt confused.
The world had come to a near end. Countless cities and towns had been destroyed, homes burned to the ground. Millions had died, some in the near-apocalypse that Kefka had brought down upon them only months before, others in the aftermath of it from illness and despair, others by their own hand, unable to live a half-life in the ruins of their old world. Fear and sadness were woven into the hearts of every man, woman and child, all with their own grief to bear and horror story to tell. In many people, there was nothing left but despair and fear.
As Kefka sat gleefully up in his homemade tower, caught up in his own sadistic pleasure, casting his light of judgment upon whoever he wished, there was still destruction to be had. Towns were still being destroyed, people were still dying, terror was still being wrought. It seemed that even after all that had happened, things could still get worse. With no one to oppose him, Kefka was completely in control, and no one knew if he would decide to make another attempt at total destruction.
Yet, Terra could still hear laughter. It was for once not the malicious, gleeful laughter of the mad Kefka Palazzo. Rather, this laughter was more sensible and without malice.
To anyone looking upon the village of Mobliz, it looked no different than any of the other towns that had been attacked by Kefka that year. Most of the homes had been burnt to the ground and the remaining buildings were in bad need of repairs. From where Terra stood, her back to the rest of the town and out on the outskirts of it facing the ruins of the rest of the world, the laughter coming from behind her was seemingly out of place. It caused an odd sensation within her that she was not yet able to place.
"Terra!"
Terra turned at the sound of her name. One of the children of Mobliz came running towards her, her long brown hair flying out past her as she ran. She came to a halt before the half-Esper, smiling up at her . "Play with us, Terra," she said happily, and as she said this, Terra's eyes slid over to where the rest of the children were playing.
'Play with them?' Terra stared in concentration at the children grouped together. They were orphans, like she herself had been, and had no one left to care for then save for a young teenage couple living in town. Terra had felt the need to care for them personally, as she knew what it was like to be left alone, but still, play with them? Did she even know how to play? An strange image of herself as a young girl in an abandoned mine, playing with Moogles crossed her mind at this. She shook the thought out of her head.
"Terra?" the girl asked hopefully, her brown eyes wide. The curious sensation within Terra began to grow and she felt herself smiling despite the anxiety it rose within her. What was it she was feeling exactly? Anger? No, not anger, something much more confusing and yet more comforting...
"All right then. I'll join you all." Terra told the girl, and as the child's face lit up, Terra could feel the strange feeling rising fit to burst.
Terra felt afraid.
As the months progressed, her at one time mild anxiety grew horribly, until it was full-blown fear. She could not explain it, not to herself and not to anyone else, but it frightened her just how strong an effect being around the children of Mobliz had on her. The poor little orphans that had survived so long without their parents. Who seemed to regarded her as their friend, their much older playmate and protector and perhaps as something more...
Terra did not understand why she thought so hard on it. She could have left town a hundred times, a thousand, every opportunity was available for her to leave, to find her old comrades, to defeat Kefka if he could actually be defeated. Yet, she did not. Whenever Terra considered leaving, the children would appear in her mind, their eyes wide and pleading, telling her to stay. They needed her and she needed them? It was not within her ability to understand and yet...
She did not know why they were making her feel this way. Her mind had not been this distorted since she had woken up in Arvis' house with a headache and no recollection of who she was save for her name. Nothing made sense anyone, not the world that she was living in, not the people in it, not even Terra's own thoughts were spared the agony that was the rest of the world around her. She could not think straight or sleep, for dreams had their own way of becoming agonizing. She was bombarded with horrific images of the children dead, killed by Kefka's light of judgment, or some other brand of foul magic, some even by her own hand.
Terra did not know why, but that thought worried her more than anything else. Her own magic had not been working properly and as her thoughts grew more and more troubled, she feared that she might lose control of it and attack someone. The children, all of them, were at horrible risk and it worried her intensely.
She did not want to hurt anyone. Her days as a slave of the empire, made to commit whatever horrific crimes that Gestahl and Kefka wanted, were long gone. Never again would Terra lose control like that and harm anyone.
Yet, Terra could not help but be afraid. She was supposed to be their protector but how could Terra protect anyone that she was a danger to?
Terra wandered through town, unable to sleep, quietly walking the ruined streets of a once beautiful village. The children and the two teenagers slept peacefully, unaware of the turmoil that rested deep within Terra's heart.
"I cannot protect them," Terra said aloud, and as she said this her own thoughts wandered back to that night in Arvis' house. He had looked after her because the Returners could use her to communicate with the Espers. There had been a reason for that. So why did she fee the need to look after these children, when she had no reason to? She didn't and yet she did have one, she must have. There was something there, some feeling of comfort in taking care of them, some old emotion that lay dormant, one that she was not yet familiar with.
Terra wandered around town, and as she did her mind wandered with her, trying to remember a time when things were much simpler, where she could relax and be at ease. Where she was once happy and at peace.
Her mind drew a blank as she realized that for all of her worries she was at her happiest here. The closest she knew to peace was for whatever reason with these children. That scared her very badly.
Terra felt angry.
Terra had never really stopped to consider how badly Gestahl and Kefka both had destroyed her life. How if it hadn't of been for them, she might have had a chance at a happy, complete life. Thanks to them, Terra had no one. Her parents were dead, the Espers had been killed and she was alone.
Terra had no true idea of who she was, no real childhood memories and no understanding of how to get them back. She could not feel love and attachment as others did and she knew that that made her different. She was alone and yet she had the children. She felt like she could understand them better than she had been able to understand the Returners, for in a sense they were like her. All alone and lost in a world of horror, left to fend for themselves. She meant to protect them, thought she didn't know how. Her magic was growing weaker as her emotions grew more and more erratic.
They were in danger, for a monster lurked around town, scaring the children. She had tried to fend it off, first with her magic and then with her sword, but both attempts had failed, leaving Terra feeling helpless.
Kefka was to blame, for if he hadn't of destroyed everything, the children wouldn't have needed her protection so badly. They would have had their parents there to protect them.
Yet, even as Terra thought this, she knew that she was to blame as well, for she should have been able to fend off the monster when it first appeared. She was weak, and at a loss for what to do, and as her thoughts grew more scattered and her magic grew faint, she felt her own anger directed towards herself. Being weak was something that Terra was accustomed to, but she needed to be strong. The children needed her to be. She did not know why, but she needed them to be safe. As long as they were happy and safe, Terra thought that some of her anger and confusion might fade, though she had no idea why. The world was in ruins and still very much at the mercy of Kefka, yet Terra could only think of the children at the moment.
They were young and helpless and needed her and it made her angry to think that she was to weak to help them. The two teenagers, Duane and Katarin tried, but they were even younger than she and were very much helpless themselves. They stayed together though, and remained as strong as possible whereas Terra secretly felt herself becoming weaker and weaker.
It made her furious with Kefka for taking away her freedom for so long and her memories with it. She felt angry at herself as well for not being able to do anything.
Terra did not know why, and felt like she never would, but she almost felt like, while the children were helpless without her, she was helpless without them too. She needed them as well and that only added to her frustration at not being able to protect them.
Terra felt helpless and Sabin and Celes' presence did not help. They were asking something that was impossible of her. They were trying to get her to help them vanquish Kefka. She couldn't do that any more than she could defeat the monster prowling around town. Terra was of no use to anyone, so why did they insist on asking for her help?
"He is not going to remain content to rule over this world forever," Celes told her, her blue eyes staring hard into Terra's own. "Eventually, Kefka is more than likely going to try again at destroying the world. When that time comes, we will need all the help we can get if we are to stop him for good."
"I wish I could help you," Terra told her. "...but I cannot. I am hardly able to care for the children in this village, I would not fare very well against someone as powerful as Kefka has become."
"Won't you at least consider it?'" Sabin asked her. "The children would be much safer with Kefka gone."
"I understand that..." Terra shook her head, her long, green curls flying about. "I wish I could, but I am not strong enough..."
As though on cue, the fiend that had been terrorizing the town for weeks on end came tearing through, heading straight towards the three. Several of the children screamed. Celes drew her sword but Terra shook her head. "I need to at least try handling this on my own," she said, drawing her own sword as she spoke.
"Firaga!" Terra cried as she attempted to cast her best fire magic. The spell would not come and the monster crashed into her, sending her flying backwards. Terra's sword flew out of her hand and she tried desperately to cast up another spell.
"Flare!" she cried, jumping to her feet as the monster lunged down at her, beating its fists furiously "Firaga! No!" Terra cried as the monster lunged at her once more, knocking her down. She then braced herself for a blow that never came.
"Blizzaga!" Celes cried and as the ice spell made contact with the fiend, Terra saw Celes and Sabin both dart past her. As they drove out the monster, Terra got to her feet. Several of the children were watching her and she felt her spirits sink even lower. She knew that she could not protect them, but it still hurt to have actual confirmation of it.
"I'm sorry," Terra said, hanging her head. "My magic is not strong enough. I am not strong enough..." she added that last part quietly to herself, unable to even look at Celes and Sabin as she spoke.
Terra felt amazed. She had been worried when she had found out that Katarin was pregnant but thankfully Katarin and Duane had come to terms with it quickly enough. She had no idea how to help them, yet she was going to put in her best effort. It mattered greatly that Katarin had no difficulty giving birth.
Her old comrades had returned to town, this time in larger numbers. She was surprised to see that so many of them had survived, yet happy at the same time. Though she would not be helping them defeat Kefka, at least there was a chance now that they were of so large a number.
"Would you at least consider it?" Locke asked her, as he walked beside her through the streets. "We all have our misgivings Terra, but you're not even pausing to give thought to..."
"She won't be leaving with you!"
Terra and Locke both jumped, startled. Running back to the center of town, they came across nearly all of Terra's children actually yelling at several members of the Returners.
"She won't be going with you!" one of the girls cried at Edgar.
"You can't take Terra away from us," another child added, turning resentful eyes on Sabin and Celes both.
"Terra is staying here with us!"
"We love Terra!" the brown haired girl added, "...and she loves us. She wouldn't leave us!"
Terra stopped in her place. For a moment, she felt nothing at all. The word Love was passing through her mind over and over, without reason or rhythm, as she was unable to process it. Then a wave of thoughts and emotions came at her at once. Love? Was that this odd feeling deep within her? This feeling, this desire to protect, her worry at not being able to. Her determination to protect the children and her happiness at being with them...that was all love?
"I didn't know that I could feel love," Terra said aloud as several of the children screamed. She turned around to see the same fiend that had appeared in town lately tearing towards her. Before she even knew what she was doing, her sword was in her hand. Running at the fiend, her sword in her right hand and a fire spell forming from the tips of her left, she lunged. Her sword cut straight through the flesh of the monster, stopping it in it's tracks and as it reared back, attempting to attack her again, her mind was filled with thoughts of the children. No, not THE children,...HER children.
Terra could feel herself transforming. Her feet left the ground, her hair grew linger and changed from green to pink, her skin turned purple and grew fur. She turned her red eyes upon the monster and let out an unearthly growl.
A few minutes later, the fiend lay dead at her bare feet. She turned around to face her children, her body slowly returning to normal, her hair changing from pink to green, her fur disappearing. Slowly she descended to the floor, her blue eyes wide, her hair a wild green mess around her. Her magic coursed through her veins, strong once more. Her children all stared in astonishment.
"Terra, was that you?" one of them asked, his eyes wide.
"Yes, it was," Terra told him, feeling her heart beating fast. Her old comrades lingered in the background, watching her carefully. Terra nodded to them before turning back to her children.
"I wanted to protect you all," she told them, staring at each one in turn. "I did not wish to alarm any of you," she added, feeling worried as several of them backed away.
"We care about you too," another boy added, as Terra's old comrades came closer.
"It is wonderful to see that you have your powers back Terra," Celes told her, her eyes searching Terra's. "Will you be joining us or not?"
"I..." Terra turned to look at the children. They all looked so helpless standing there, so alone. Terra had no intention of deserting them. She would be back, after she had helped the others vanquish Kefka.
"I am going to make the world safe for you all," she promised them. "...and I will be back. I won't leave you all alone."
Terra felt happy.
The Falcon flew high, traveling as fast as it could go and as far away from the demolished tower as possible. Terra flew beside it, her long pink hair flying out past her, her head held high. The wind blowing past her as she flew both exhilarated her and frightened her. This was her first time freely enjoying herself as she was, her first and perhaps last time being Terra.
Thoughts whirled through her mind faster than she could process them. She had never imagined that life would take her this far, had never thought that so much could happen. As she flew higher, all she could think of was how different things were, for all of them.
She was changing, that she could feel. As they got farther and farther away from Kefka's domain, she began to feel more and more strange. The magic within her was weakening, she was losing control of it once more, and she was getting dizzy. Her hair was slowly regaining it's emerald coloring and her fur was thinning. She flew over the airship now, so that when she finally let go of her Esper side for good, she would not fall. She was starting to feel lightheaded...
Terra lay on the floor of the airship a moment later, her green hair spilling out of her ponytail and her clothing a mess. Ignoring several of her comrades attempts to help her up, she staggered to her feet. Her head was throbbing from the fall and her eyes were watering but she payed no mind to this. Slowly making her way to the front of the airship, she caught the eyes of several of her friends watching her. Celes the former general, Locke the treasure hunter and Edgar, in particular. Paying them no mind, she froze at the end of the ship.
She could see Mobliz from here. Not very well but it was visible. The children would be waiting for her. Her children...
Terra had never felt this way before. Never had she cared for anyone and never had anyone ever cared for her. She had grown up in a world of solitude, trapped away from everyone else, never with a will of her own. She had at first mistaken her own feelings for the children, and had grown weak because of it. She had been frightened of the feelings of love and affection that had entered her as she cared for her children. No longer would she feel that way.
As Terra stood aboard the airship, for the first time in her life she felt like she understood what it meant to live life. To celebrate everyday, one day at a time, to cherish the good times when they came, to learn and to teach, and most importantly...to love.
Her magic was gone, had faded away like a passing dream. She was human now, fully human, and she was still alive. A feeling of elation filled her. Pulling her hair out of it's band, she let it fall loose of it's constraints. It flew past her as it had earlier when she was flying...free, undisturbed.
Terra didn't know what was going to happen next. Everything around her seemed hectic. Edgar and Sabin were laughing and Celes and Locke were embracing, Relm was teasing Strago and Setzer was steering the airship. She had her children and the others...Katarin would soon be giving birth. She was not alone, she and all of the others were all happy, they were together...and Terra felt...
...Terra felt free.
