Clint looked at the scene before him and wondered how he could escape unnoticed. A glance over to Nat showed that she would be of no help. If anything she seemed all too happy to watch this unfold.
He scowls at her over his coffee. She could actually fix this real fast, but she won't, Clint knows that. The least she could do was direct them out of the kitchen. …it's not like anyone eats here or anything. No, everyone loves having their breakfast ruined by this nonsense. It was way too early for this. He hadn't even finished his first cup of coffee yet. Clint sighs and receives a kick to the shin for his troubles.
Steve and Tony were arguing again. Something happened between last night and this morning, what it was he wouldn't be able to guess. Steve had been aloof and grumpy even after his morning run. And when Tony had entered the kitchen all hell broke loose.
She leans in closer to him, not taking her eyes off the scene before them. Clint moves in closer out of habit. "You keep saying you wish they just get there shit together. This might be it" She whispers to him.
Clint scoffs. He was beginning to doubt that those Steve and Tony would ever work things out between them. With how they seem to deal with things, they would all be retired by the time they workout their personal relationship. On the field Captain America and Iron Man worked seamlessly, off duty it was as much a gamble as the weather.
"You know you could help them out. All your training... This would be a walk in the park." He argued. He knew Nat wouldn't intervene. She could sort those two idiots out in no time at all, but no, she'd rather watch this mess.
"This is far more satisfying." She says, smirking at him.
"In what way is this satisfying?" he says, his voice raising in frustration. Nat gives him a look. "This is what TV is for anyway"
"Your TV programs are repetitive and dull" Nat says.
Clint stifles his groan. "I know its crap. TV is crap! That's what TV is for. No one wants this bull in their kitchen" he says, gesturing to their 'Leaders'.
She rolls her eyes at him. "You could leave." She says "I'd doubt they would care… or notice"
"It's the same old stick, Nat. Every time it is the same. What makes you think this time would be any different? What makes you think this would be 'it'?"
Nat sends him a look, judging him. "If you would listen…"
He runs his free hand over his face. "Would rather not have to bleach my brains, thanks" he says. This was the stuff he tried to avoid getting involved in.
She shakes her head at him. "Tony walked in on Steve waxing his gun" she explains.
Clint looks over to the two men arguing just outside of the kitchen. "Shit. No way"
Her lips curl up in a smile. "Yeah." She says, "And Tony is try-…"
He cuts in eagerly, "-trying to figure out who Steve was saluting to? And without-" This was unbelievable… and something he could see happening between the two guys.
She cuts back in over him, just as eager "-Without letting Steve know he has a huge thing for him, and appearing as if he doesn't care either way"
"And Steve is embarrassed of course." He adds, unable to keep his own smile off his face now. "And not happy about Tony getting further into his business"
"Of course." She says.
Clint sets his coffee cup onto the counter, continuing "… and so he is shutting himself off emotionally"
Nat hums in agreement.
"And Tony…" He says.
She gives a quiet laugh. "…Trying to act like it doesn't affect him, Steve closing himself off, but it does"
"Okay. I'll pay that this is better than my shows" he says.
They watch their leaders argue back and forth in silence.
Clint turns to Nat. "How did you know Tony caught Steve rubbing one out?" he asks.
"It was quite a scene. I don't know how you missed it" Nat says.
"It's all go around here, isn't it?" He mutters to himself.
The End
Notes: For the "Merry Month of Masturbation 2019"