101 Things I Can't do at the CCC

by katkidology

When at the CCC, there is a certain protocol one must respect. You are a Cahill, and need to act as one. Unfortunately, not all of the younger generation have realized that yet. So this list was created, using actual events that have occurred in the past. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the Cahill Command Centre.

1. Chapter 1

Me: Knock knock!

You: Who's there?

Me: Own the 39 clues.

You: Own the 39 clues who?

Me: Well, not me, so stop rubbing it in, will you? :(

---

1. Do not sing to Saladin. (Me: ALL TOGETHER NOW! SMELLY CAT, SMELLY CAT, WHAT ARE THEY FEEDING YOU?!)
2. At 2:00 AM, do not run throughout the CCC screaming profanity. (Such manly pajamas Jonah!)
3. Do not take a picture of the above, and post it on Facebook (But Jonah! Don't you want everyone to see your pajamas?)
4. Dont call Ian a Barbie (it's not my fault he looks like one!)
5. Dont attempt to sneak into Sinead's room. (I don't know why this is on here. It hurt me more than you.)
6. Dont mess with Ned and Ted's experiments (Poor Ian is back in the hospital...)
7. Do not introduce the Cahills to the mysterious ticking noise. (Ian, Ian, rich snobby Ian, Ian, Ian, rich snobby Ian, Alistair! Ian, Ian, rich snobby Ian, Ian, Ian, rich snobby Ian, Alistair! Dan! Dan! The ninja lord, Dan! Dan! The ninja lord, Amy, Amy, Amy, Amy, Amy, Amy, Amy, Amy, Alistair! Ooh! Hammer! Yeah hammer! Yeah hammer! Ooh hammer! Hammer Ian hammer Ian hammer Ian BURRITO BOY! Aaaaamy! Alistair, I'm the epic hammer, yeah the epic hammer. everyone: SINGING OUR SONG! ALL DAY LONG AT THE GAAAAAUNTLET! Dan: I FOUND THE SOURCE OF THE TICKING! IT'S THE MASTER SERUM! Kids: YAAAAAY! Adults: gasp! BOOOOM! Mwahahaha! Isabel Isabel izzy izzy izzy izzy Isabel! Bamamamamamaaaa!)
8. Dont paint Hamilton's track suit pink. (I'm still coughing up feathers...)
9. Dont tell Nellie Dan needs dating advice (2 HOURS. 2 WHOLE HOURS.)
10. Do not handcuff Amy and Ian together. (Ian: I'll sue you! And the municipal police force! And the police chief! And...
Me: the landscape architect?
Ian: AND THE LANDSCAPE ARCHITECT!)
11. Dont prank call Eisenhower. (Me: 'Ello? Monsieur Esenhowerrr? Vould you like to schedule anotherrr spa appointment? Eisenhower: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT... Hehe...)
12. Dont call Natalie a peasant. (She was crying and didn't even try to kill me. Until 1 hour ago...Me: Oh, hi Ian! You're totally rocking that hospital gown! Ian: I'LL SUE!)
13. Dont call Ted Frodo. (Me: Hey Frodo.
Ted: *groans* Everyone keeps calling me that! I dont know who you're talking about! Who is Frodo?!
Me: *shaking head while everyone else gasps* Ted, that's sad. Even for you.)
14. Dont order pizza without telling anyone. (Me: Okay, I was just trying to be thoughtful! Hamilton was on kitchen duty, and he can't cook for his life. And I didn't activate the security system! Dan did! *everyone looks at dan*
Dan: IT WAS DARK, OKAY?!)
15. Put Hamilton on kitchen duty in the first place. (The vomit stains on the carpet are self explanatory.)
16. Dont reunite Buffy and Ian. (This sueing rant lasted for over an hour. But guess what! Ian STILL has his pink and white boxers!)
17. Dont go shopping with Jonah. Or to mc Donald's with Jonah. Or go anywhere outside with Jonah. (Those fan girls are vicious. We're in the hospital so much nowadays, we have our own ward.)
18. Dont go anywhere near Nellie's iPod. (my original plan was to steal it. I didn't even make it a step.)
19. Don't put Dan in charge of code names. (Ted=Frodo, Ned=leprechaun, Sinead=Starbucks, Hamilton=hulk, Reagan=tutu, Madison=she-hulk, Jonah=hamlet, Ian=teddy bear, Natalie=dart gun, Amy=jade, Dan=ninja.)
20. Don't 'strife' with Hamilton. (Hamilton: *cracks knuckles* Me: Ab... Ab... Ab... ABORT! ABORT!)
21. You should not light a match in Natalie's bathroom. (I'm surprised she hasn't blown another hole in the ozone layer.)
22. Do not play tricks on Ted. (But he's blind! It's sooooo easy!)
23. "I invented sexy" is not an appropriate response to Jonah saying he's bringing sexy back. (He was speechless for once.)
24. If Hamilton happens to overhear this, and says, "Actually you're both wrong. I brought sexy back years ago." it is rude to agree. (I have learned some very colorful shakespeare insults from that encounter.)
25. If Ian decides to walk in on that very moment, and claims that sexy never left, it is inappropriate to throw the ice cooler at his head. (Hey, at least it missed!)