UPDATE

Disclaimer: I (still) don't own anything from 'The Nanny'

A/N: No changes in plot, I only corrected errors in spelling and changed use of tenses few times, where I was able to notice they were used wrong. Even though I expanded a bit my knowledge about English since the time I've published the story, there still may be a lot of mistakes so please forgive.

The Letter

„I've never loved anyone. I didn't believe in love. I thought it doesn't exist.

You know why I turned down your proposal? Just because you were always so caring, protective, you wanted all best for me, you were… loving. You've loved me that non – existent love. And I didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want you to be with a woman, who doesn't love you, just because she doesn't believe in love. I've always wanted for you to be happy, that's all.

You're probably thinking now, why I didn't give you any choice, but I think that way was better. For both of us. You'd be hurt, no matter what possibility you would have chosen. That's why I decided for you.

It's one sentence: "If you love someone, let him go.". So I let you go. Does it mean that I love you? Because I don't know that feeling. I always knew just bitterness, sadness, hate, anger and hurt. How the love feels like?

You see, that's why I had to let you go. It was better for you, trust me.

With all hate

C.C.

P.S. I always knew, that you hate me more. (I know, that you'll understand that.)

C.C. "

He was kneeling on the ground nearby her grave, reading the letter and crying. The woman which he has loved was gone. Forever.

She was found in her penthouse dead, right after she'd canceled her wedding with unbelievably rich guy, whose name she couldn't even remember. The death was caused by mixing a bottle of scotch with antidepressants.

Niles couldn't believe that she was no longer alive. His sweet, blue-eyed, blond Babs... She was looking at him from the photography beside her name, which was escalating Niles's pain. He couldn't handle the fact, that he wasn't able to help her. He couldn't bare a thought, that he hadn't a chance to teach her love. Only thing he wanted at the moment was death. He wanted to be dead just like she was. Maybe somewhere there was certain Place After Death, where he could find her. And show her that love existed for real.

xxx

Few hours later, he'd came back home and gone to sleep with the letter cuddled to heart and with picture of C.C. under his eyelids. When he hadn't shown up at the breakfast, Maxwell went to his room and found him lying on his bed breathless, with idyllic smile on his lips and sheet of paper on his chest.

After autopsy, doctors said it was another heart attack and no one could've helped him.

Now, he's walking along the alleys of the Place After Death, dressed in his best suit, with sunflowers in his hand. That is really drawing attention of thousands of woman, which are passing him by. But he doesn't even seem to be noticing them… He's looking for the One he has always loved. And because time doesn't count here, he'll have forever for this.

THE END?