Oh man...It's been a while. Hello everyone, how have you been? I'm baaack... SO, new story. FYI, there is much swearing ahead. Prepare for the f-bombs. I promise not every chapter will be like this.

Disclaimer: I don't have John living in my closet...unfortunately

Dear John,

Fuck you. Seriously. If I could have it my way, I'd leave it at that, but I'm required by my teacher to write at least a page to you about something. I don't see the point, since the odds of you actually reading this are hilariously small. So I'll rant about how much your music pisses me off instead.

Your songs are unrealistic, repetitive and extremely similar. Even your guitar player doesn't actually really play guitar (strumming a chord in rhythm doesn't count as playing.) Okay, maybe not one chord, but five chords, max.

Also, the effect you have on your fans is fucking obnoxious. I literally hear about twenty times a day how fantastic one of you four are. At least. English is hell enough without hearing about how fantastic George Harrison's cheekbones are for the entire goddamned period.

You know, I'm in a band, too. It's not going to take off like yours has, primarily because I'm in it, but we used to be able to cover Twist and Shout without it being "that one song John Lennon always sings and makes my ovaries spontaneously combust."

So now we're back to the whole fuck you thing. And you're probably wondering why I have to write this thing anyway.

Our english teacher is a huge fan and wanted us to write letters. We went over sentence structure and all that jazz, despite the fact that I learned all of it by the time I was 10.

I'm 16 now, in case you were wondering. I live in Chicago, Illinois. You've been here before. I know this because just about every girl in my grade freaked out about it.

So yeah. Fuck you. Fuck you for your nonexistent talent, your stupid, shaggy head, your obnoxious voice and your nonexistent sense of humor. Go to hell. Maybe then, I won't need to listen to your fans.

With Most Sincerity,

Alex Croft

So yeah. I'll update whenever I get around to it, which may be tomorrow or next week. I tend to be very...sporadic at best :)

It feels good to be back