Author's notes: I've never read or written a FMA fan fiction, so hopefully it's not as terribly cliché as I think it is. It was just something I wrote very quickly to entertain myself. The title comes from a The Used song There's Blood On My Hands. Ed didn't kill Al, but he still feels responsible for what happened to them. I don't really know if I like the title, or if it suit's the fic, but I just wanted to get it off my computer, so I gave it a quick one.
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"No… You're cheating. The law… I know the laws…" Edward laid still in his bed as his brother kicked and murmured in his own. The horrors of what'd they'd seen and lost were still with them, and Edward knew there would be more ahead, because it seemed to be human nature to bring about destruction and loss.
Edward's nightmares were mostly of war, and of death. He hadn't forgotten about the past, but he no longer dreamed about it; he'd moved on from their little home in Resembool. Instead he saw both worlds crumbling in war, and though he was sometimes accompanied by others, Al was always the one screaming the loudest for his brother to save him from the carnage.
Al still dreamed about their mother and the gate. Everything still seemed new to him: waking up to find his brother gone, gaining his memories back. Being stuck in an unfamiliar place wasn't helping either of them recover, and it wasn't just the inn they were staying at for the night, it was this new world they'd been forced to live in. Well, Al hadn't been forced, but Edward had.
He didn't understand why he always had to be the one to make sacrifices and make things right. But then there were a lot of things that he didn't understand. He didn't understand why he and Al had to miss out on their childhood, and even now that he was legally an adult, he was still trying to fix the world's problems. And worst was not knowing why he felt he had to solve them. He'd told Al that it was their duty to help make their home safe because everyone contributes, because that was the only way he could think to describe it.
"Equivalent exchange!" Edward continued to lie still in his bed, letting his breath come evenly as his brother sat up and turned to look at him. He waited as Al turned away and began to scrub at his eyes with the back of his hand. They'd been taking it in turns to cry out in the middle of the night after awaking from some nightmare. Neither acknowledged the incidents, they'd just stay awake talking until the other fell asleep.
"What's the matter, Al?" He asked when His brother had finally dropped his arms in his lap. "Bed too stiff? " The younger Elric's eyes darted to his brother then back to his lap.
"Yeah, but it's fine." Al turned to lay back down.
"You sure? Mine might be better." Edward scooted over and pulled the covers back. The younger Elric only stared for a moment before saying quietly, " Thanks," and climbed out of his bed and walked across the room to his brother's.
Edward threw the covers over Al as he settled himself with his back to his elder brother. "Better?" He nodded slightly.
"Good night, brother."
"Night, Al." Another thing he didn't understand was why he felt he had to treat Al like a kid. Sure, he was thirteen on the outside, but he should have been 16; he'd lived through more than most adults. Maybe it was because he was still so… not innocent, but kind hearted. Or maybe it was just because Edward was the older brother and he'd always feel that way. Al liked being treated as a kid anyway; no one wondered where your parents were, or worried that you were out past dark when you're a giant suit of armor.
Ed felt a bit guilty thinking about this sometimes, and always knowing that it was in the back of his mind, but he was glad that his little brother had been returned to the age he was before he'd lost his body. Even if he remembered everything that had happened, at least he got to start over again in his human body. He knew what was beyond the gate, and he remembered the bloody mess they'd transmuted that was supposed to be their mother, but he still got another chance at childhood. Sure, it was odd to suddenly be five years older than him on the outside, but they were still the same people on the inside.
"Breakfast!" Edward awoke to one of the Inn workers knocking on their door. He glanced over to see that Al was still sleeping. He'd shifted during the night and was now sleeping slightly curled against Edward's side, forehead resting against his one flesh shoulder.
"Be right out. Leave it outside the door, please."
"Yes, sir."
Edward sat against the wall, pulling the pillow further under his brother's head before carefully pulling his legs away to crawl out of bed. His automail leg brushed against his flesh leg as he did so; it was warm from resting against Al's all night. He smiled as he rubbed his automail arm, which was slightly cooler than his leg.
He suddenly felt that he didn't mind having to sacrifice, at least not for his brother. If he had to have a metal body, at least his brother could have a warm one.
He crawled out of the bed to retrieve their food from the hall.
" Morning, brother." Al said as he stretched.
"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you up. You can go back to sleep If you want. We can get you something to eat later." Edward said as he sat in a chair beside the food cart.
"Naw, that's okay. I'm starving; you ate half my dinner last night. I'm not letting you eat my breakfast too." He said cheerfully, as he climbed out of bed and over to the food.
"Starving my foot! Your stomach was about to explode. I did it for your safety." Ed shook his head as he watched his brother sit cross-legged on the floor with his tray. Maybe Al had been forced to live in this world. His heart still burned when he thought about coming to the conclusion that he had to leave Al in their world. He reached out his flesh arm and attempted to flatten his brother's bed head.
If he'd been in Al's position, there was no question as to whether he would have done the same thing; he'd always choose to be where his brother was. It'd taken all his self-control not to beg his little brother to come with him, because he knew Al would have, even if he didn't want to. He let his hand linger on Al's head.
"What?" His brother turned to him with curious eyes and a mouth full of egg and toast.
"Nothing. Eat your breakfast." He said, kicking him playfully in the side.
"Hey!" Al called as he fell sideways. "Why are you so abusive, brother?"
"Sorry." Ed laughed as he held his hand out to help him up. "I was just thinking, I love you, you idiot."
"I feel sorry for the girl you fall in love with." He said as he brushed egg off his face. "I know you do," Al said once he was upright again. He continued to hold onto his brother's prosthetic hand, looking at it as if he'd never seen it before, "You don't have to tell me." He smiled briefly up at the elder Eric before turning his eyes back to the metal that was modeled to look like a human hand. Edward could have sworn there was a glint of guilt in his little brother's eyes.
Al pushed one of the automail fingers down so that it bent. "sometimes I forget that you can't feel it. I mean, I know what it's like not to feel -anything, bust still… it must be odd." He let his brother have his Hand back.
"I can feel it." Ed touched the finger briefly to his cheek and then to his brother's. "It's warm." Al gave him a genuine smile this time.
"I love you too, brother."
Screw the universe. Al was all that mattered. He was a kid, and he was finally going to be taken care of. All that mattered was that Ed could do this for him. Normal Children didn't wander from town to town getting in to trouble every other night. Ed and Al's problems were solved; it was time he let other people solve theirs.
"So how do you like this town, Al? Much nicer than the city, isn't it?"
"Yeah, I like it. The people are a lot friendlier here."
"What would you say to staying here for a bit? My money's not gunna last forever."
"I don't mind. Do you think anyone around here would hire a thirteen year old?"
"I'll get the job."
"But we'll get more money if I work too."
"We don't need a whole lot. Just enough to live off of."
"But traveling is expensive."
"We won't be traveling for a while."
"But if we don't have enough money to travel, then that's even more of a reason for me to help out. And why didn't you tell me we were running out of money? All those big meals, this Inn -We could have been saving-"
"I've got plenty of money, Al. I'm just saying that we'll eventually have to stop and get more, so why not do it while we can still afford to? So there's no reason for both of us to work."
"But what am I supposed to do then?" Ed took his tray off the cart and placed it in his brother's lap before beginning to cleanup the mess on the floor.
"Maybe you can actually enroll in school."
"School?"
"Yeah. It's what normal kids do." He kept his eyes on the floor, afraid his brother would catch on. He'd have to get used to the idea of living in one place for a while. His brother liked to try and fix the world's problems too.
"But I-"
He turned to look his brother in the eyes, and said, a bit more firmly, "We've gotta blend in, Al. We don't need to attract any more attention."
"Alright, brother."
"Good. I'll see about a place to stay and a job today."
"How long are we going to stay here?" Al picked up a piece of bacon and began nibbling on it.
"As long as it takes us the save up some money."
"How long is that?"
"We'll see." They were together (mostly) in the flesh now; that had been their goal since they started their journey six years ago. It was finally over. Now all Ed could do was make their family of two as normal and happy as possible. No, he didn't mind sacrificing. He'd work and take care of the bills if it meant all Al had to worry about was girls and homework. It wasn't really sacrificing if it made his brother happy. He'd had a hand in taking away Al's childhood, and he'd never forget that.
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Author's notes: I hope you enjoyed it. Reviews are greatly appreciated! I plan on writing another chapter, but whether or not I post it depends on whether I get reviews. Lol Since I mainly write to entertain myself, no use posting something no one wants to read! :op
BTW, this was not written as Elricest, just some fluff. You're free to see it that way, just don't tell me. Lol