The Art of Regeneration

McRaider

Summary: The Doctor (11) contemplates his new body, his new thoughts and his new companion after The Beast.

Warning: Spoilers for 5x1 and 5x2 and all of series 1 and 4

Author's Note: I find similarities very…comforting actually. Also this is to all my readers, my loyal readers who've been reading and rereading some of my stuff as I get back on the fanfiction horse. I'm back, thanks to National Treasure and Doctor Who series 5. I hope to write a lot more.

He sat in the console room, brand new and beautiful, he smiled. Jack would love this. So would Rose. She'd been so connected to the machine; sometimes he was sure she'd loved it more than him. He paused at that thought. He missed her. He missed all of his companions.

A brief smile crossed his younger face at the thought of his newest companion. He was aware of the similarities. That woman, no doubt going through the wardrobe, reminded him of two former companions. Perhaps that why he cared for her so much. He'd be lying if he said he didn't care for her in a way he'd cared for Rose.

She'd made him promise she'd love again, after all they'd been through, and she'd only been worried about him.

"Promise me; promise me Doctor, that you'll never become that man again."

"Which man?" He asked his beautiful former companion.

She reached out, touching his cheek, "The man who forgot what a second chance was. The man who was so angry and so hurt after the destruction of his planet. The man who stood by and watched people die. That's a bad place to be Doctor. And it's not you."

She'd been wise beyond her years. He'd done that to her. But then, she was right. He'd taken her from an angry man, who was bent on never accepting the guilt that threatened to overwhelm him every moment. He'd killed his people. The guilt was beyond overwhelming after it had occurred. But Rose, Rose had been the one who made him see that sometimes people have to sacrifice themselves for everyone else.

It was a sticky concept, but he knew she'd been right. Even as he'd faced that choice hundreds of times, he still felt guilt tear through him every time he faced it. But Amy, Amy had done something few had ever done. Perhaps that's why she reminded him so deeply of Rose and Donna. Feisty and smart, brilliant and willing to cope with the consequences as well, she'd hit the button without as much as a second thought. He knew somewhere inside that what she'd done probably had scared her to pieces, but she'd been willing to risk it. It had been scary and dangerous, but like Donna had at Pompeii and Rose with the Daleks, she'd been prepared to give herself if it meant saving him from a little pain. Her gamble had been dead on.

So many times he'd called his companions stupid humans, and so many times they proved him wrong.

"It wasn't like I planned to save him-"

Even if she hadn't, he wasn't angry at Rose then, he wasn't angry at Amy now. His thoughts were interrupted when she stepped into the console room, much to his surprise she was wearing a pair of jeans, and a shirt that Rose had worn a very long time ago. "I…I found this in one of the bedrooms…I wasn't sure-"

The Doctor smiled, "You look good in it, almost as good as Rose did when she wore it."

"Rose was…like me, your traveler?"

He smiled, "She was my companion yes. Very much like you and yet different in everyway."

"You said you were still cooking."

"I'm sorry?" He wasn't sure of the question.

"When you met me, fourteen years ago, you'd said you weren't done cooking. Are you done now?"

"Quite."

"And…what does that mean? I saw the image the aliens showed before you came to take me away. There were other faces…none of them looked alike, but they all had one thing in common."

He raised his eyebrows, curious to know what she was thinking. "And that was?"

"The weight of an entire universe resting on their shoulders, I figured you didn't want the weight of the floating city on your shoulders too…so I did it. I'm sorry I took that choice away from you. You're right that's not my place, but I do feel as your companion, it's at least my place to make my own decisions and try to help you take the brunt of the pain."

Reaching out, The Doctor took her hand and drew her close, "I had a friend who taught me a long time ago that it's okay to feel once in awhile. Thank you Amy, for reminding me of that. It's important that we share these adventures with one another."

She smiled warmly at him, before throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him close. "You aren't alone anymore; I don't know how long you were alone before this. But you're not anymore."

The Doctor grinned, and for the first time since Rose had really left, he didn't feel alone anymore, he didn't feel the pain he was used to. Rather he felt comfort in knowing he wouldn't have to walk these halls alone anymore.