ok, this is my first fanfic ever, so be kind. comment and let me know what you think.
(DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything Twilight related, this is purely a work of fanfics)
Bella,
I have no idea where I should begin. For once in my 90 years of life I am at a loss for words. Dear, sweet Bella, you must know how I truly feel. I love you and only you. You are the one that if my heart could beat, it would beat for. When I left you those two terrible years ago, you should have known I still loved you. All of those nights and whispers were never taken for granted. I thought I was doing you a favor, giving you a chance at a normal life, but I can't do it anymore. I'm a good liar, but not that good. How could you believe I didn't love you when I said it everyday? Not a day has gone by when I haven't thought of you, Bella, and I have realized that I can't, nor want to live without you. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness for all of the pain I put you through, but if you could somehow find it in your heart to tell me if the feelings you had for me are still there, then I will spend the rest of eternity hoping and begging you to forgive me. I love you Bella, with all of my being, and I hope you still love me too.
Please forgive me…
All of my love,
Edward
I put the letter down on my bed after reading it for about the 100th time that night. I picked it up again and scanned it for the words I was looking for. "I still love you… good liar… forgive me… I love you …" I still couldn't believe it. Two years ago, the love of my existence, Edward Cullen, broke my heart. Now he says it was all a lie.
My head spun, my eyes burned from the tears, and my heart ached the old, familiar ache that came when I thought of him. A year and a half ago I would have been ecstatic with this news, but now all I felt was confused and overwhelmed. When he left, Jacob put me together again, with his love, kindness, and patience. After those first four months - my "dark ages" - I was finally becoming Bella again, but not totally. I still had a broken part of myself locked away in my heart that would have most likely never resurfaced, until now. Jacob was understanding and caring. He was the best medicine I could have ever had.
I eventually started to date a few guys, but found myself never fully opening up and committing to a relationship. Finally it dawned on me. Jacob. We had always been friends, but I knew he wanted more. I decided to give him a shot. We started dating, to his total and utter disbelief - he thought I'd never give in, but he still persisted - a little over a year ago. Things went well and progressed quickly. We were completely compatible, like he always said we would be, and I found myself happy. Not the same happy I found with Edward, but a different kind, yet still just as appealing. After six months of serious dating, Jacob, to everyone's extreme enjoyment, proposed to me. The whole town thought we were perfect together. After all, he put me back together when no one else could. After a few days of pondering, I accepted…
I snapped out of reminiscing mode as quickly as I had entered it, and stopped toying with my hair. What was I going to do? I loved Jacob, but not the same way I loved Edward. Love? Loved? Love? I couldn't decide. With this recent news, could I unlock my heart again and turn away from Jacob? I shook my head in confusion. "What am I going to do?" I thought. Edward… Jacob… Edward? Jacob? I had no idea who to choose.
Could Edward really be sincere, or had my subconscious conjured up this scenario? No, I had his letter, his beautiful letter, with his beautiful script, sealed with his beautiful kiss. He was still out there, still loving me. "What am I going to do?" I thought again. I read his letter once more, and yet still had no answer. "I love you," it said. Why did he have to write my NOW? Edward used to have such perfect and impeccable timing. What happened? What am I going to do tomorrow when I'm supposed to walk down the isle and marry Jacob?
how'd i do?? it's short, but i plan to write more later. comment!!