This was written back when I still had my writing mojo. I'm still trying my best to get it back, don't you worry, but hopefully one day it'll come back to me. Hopefully. I pray that I really will. I miss Sonic.

Contrary to popular belief, Sonic did not have a death wish.

No matter how many times he travelled at supersonic speeds, jump across nothing on the off chance he'd make it to the other side safely, channel the power of the chaos emeralds even if it was dangerous, smashed robots with his own body even if he shouldn't have been able to, face down robots and demons and darkness itself, all with a smirk on his face, he never had the intention of dying an early death.

Because every time Sonic had to do anything remotely dangerous, he was fully aware of it and was thrilled by it. Being the Fastest Thing Alive, he knew his limits, but he also knew that he could always push them further. And the best way to do that was to keep doing and doing it and doing it until got better.

Because, contrary to popular belief, Sonic wasn't born with his speed. He gained it, along with the rest of his abilities.

But it wasn't like he was forced to, no. It had started small and insignificant, like chasing a stray ball down a street, or having to use a little extra force to launch himself higher into a tree for hide and seek, that had made him want to get better, stronger, faster. He knew how far he could go, but he wanted to go even further.

It wasn't until Sonic had to push himself because no one could do what he could, like protecting a kid from a bunch of bullies, or saving a bunch of poor animals from a hoard of badnicks, or reuniting a kidnapped girl with her mother, that he wanted to push past his limits and go further. He genuinely liked helping people out, it trained him, physically and mentally, and it was fun.

After venturing out of his home, saving cities and even the whole world, Sonic had quickly gained much skill, talent and wisdom – not that it was obvious. But after years of learning, practicing and saving the world, he could rightly claim that he was pretty damn awesome, and deserved the title Fastest Thing Alive and Hero of Mobius.

And it also mean that he was, in his own right, pretty good at what he did, if the fact that the universe was still in one piece was reason enough. Sure, he'd made a few mistakes here and there, but nothing he didn't find the solution to afterwards.

Sonic knew what he could do, what he was capable of and what he could get away with. He was not only confident that he could keep himself alive and looking badass while saving the world, he was sure that he could also protect his friends, even though they could handle whatever adventure they'd get themselves into.

Though said friends wouldn't really call it an 'adventure' instead of 'trouble' or thought of it as 'getting themselves into' rather than 'being dragged by that blue hedgehog!'. And they each had different ideas regarding Sonic's 'confidence', all of which said blue hedgehog is well aware of.

Shadow calls it foolishness, that Sonic would go out of his way to take the longest path, the strongest opponent and the most dangerous course of action possible, just for the heck of it. The ultimate lifeform liked to do things as quickly and efficiently as possible, with the least amount of energy used – no, wasted – for the mission.

Knuckles, on the other hand, finds it to be nothing more than showing off. He finds that Sonic goes out of his way to use the flashiest and most dramatic moves and entrances, and has a mouth that won't stop talking. He is a silent guardian, and does only what is necessary, a contrast to Sonic's own style of movement.

Amy however calls it gracefulness and experience, and she admires it through and through. The way Sonic carries himself and how he never falters, never missteps, never misses his target, is what makes him her idol, her hero, and her loved one.

Tails, though…

Sonic looks at the young fox, who he's raised and taken in and is his brother in all but blood, and sees two things.

The first is worry, concern, and fear. His little brother knows better than anyone that one wrong move on the hedgehog's part could be his life, and he is afraid of losing the first person he's ever come to call a friend, and family.

It is something that, on very rare occasions, Sonic will also see it in Shadow's stiff posture, Knuckles' clenched fists and in Amy's tear-brimmed eyes. All of them knows the lengths Sonic goes to do what needs to be done, regardless of the consequences he will bring to himself.

But Tails is the only one that will not voice out his fear, because of the other thing that Sonic sees in him that he does not see in the others.

It is trust.

Tails trust his brother not to selflessly sacrifice himself for the sake of the world, trusts his brother to do everything he can to make it out in one piece, do everything he can to come back to his friends and smile and give them a thumb's up just like he's always did. Because Tails knows that Sonic knows what he is capable of, and would never try to do anything that was beyond his capabilities. He would never give him, his friends, and the world, false hope.

Besides, Sonic's never let them down before. Right?

"It's not working! I can't get past the fire wall!"

"Sonic! If you can hear me, get the hell out of there!"

"What do you think I'm trying to do, Knux? Get my nails done?"

"Now is not the time for jokes, faker!"

"Sonic! How far are you from the exit?!"

"Eh, should be out in - ….shoot."

"What?! What's happening?!"

No answer.

"Sonic! Answer us!"

"Hey, you think it's easy trying to fight your way out of this base?!"

"8..7..6.."

"Please hurry, Sonic!"

"I'm…trying…"

"…5...4..."

"Hey, guys – "

"If you have time to talk, then you have time to get out, damnnit!"

"Go, Sonic!"

"Sonic, whatever you do, don't – "

"..3..2…"

" – I'm sorry."

"What?! What the heck're you do – "

"…1."

BOOM.

(He should've figured the first time he'd let his friends down would be his last.)