For Better or Worse
Another Orthoclase-and-Pearl one shot. I'm having fun with these characters.
Note: this is canon with my Breaking Down series, not so much with the actual show. In BD canon the Diamonds aren't actually Diamonds, it's an honorary title given after the only actual diamond, Diamond Core, sacrificed herself to save Homeworld. Yellow Diamond is also an Orthoclase, which bothers this Orthoclase big time.
Also, here is the obligatory request to check out my novel on Amazon if you like my work: The Hothouse Princesses by S.A. Hemstock.
…..
Pearl didn't know why Orthoclase had chosen her out of the many, many pearls she had destroyed or remodeled in her time. There was nothing really that special about her. The 5VO series hadn't been popular, or even unpopular enough to gain cult status. They were just not thought about, and once the 6VOs came out the following orbit they were completely forgotten.
She had been given to a Topaz as a gift, an unwanted one. The Topaz had passed her on to a Lapis Lazuli that already had a pearl of her own and had no need of another. She shoved Pearl into the back of a closet for close to two orbits and finally remembered she was there just in time to sell her off to pay a debt.
The Carnelian she had been sold to collected unusual pearls, mostly limited editions and a few remodels. She bought Pearl for the sake of completing a set but had no actual tasks for her (all tasks were performed by her first pearl, who was older than most of the others put together) and in the end she decided Pearl didn't fit her aesthetic and passed her on to an Emerald she had met towards the end of the zoatox war.
The Emerald had scars from the war, some physical but mostly psychological. Despite wanting a pearl of her own, she seemed afraid of the one she ended up with. Most of the orders she gave were for Pearl to stay away from her. At times she looked at Pearl like she was going to shatter her if she got too close.
Eventually, Emerald's scars got the better of her. She shattered a pearl in a public square because it had been walking quietly behind her and she happened to see it in a reflected window image. She had turned around and cut it in half with her summoned ax. The pearl belonged to a Larimar that was connected with one of the Diamond's closest advisers, and so Emerald was arrested and sent to isopod instead of merely paying the fine that usually came with shattering someone's property.
Her apartment was raided and her assets seized, including Pearl. Because Emerald had been a commander during the war, they were concerned that Pearl had classified information in her memory and orders were given for her to be processed.
She made her peace with it. She was lucky, in her own way, that she had been so ignored. It could have been much worse. She gave her memories to the impound pearl, and happily sat on the crushing plate waiting for the press to descend on her and smash her into powder.
But it didn't.
Instead, she felt a sharp object poked into her waist and released her form instantly.
…..
"What was your old owner like?"
"Which one?"
"Well, how many did you have?"
"Four."
"Yeesh, how did you manage to go through four owners and still come out almost perfect?"
"I was very lucky."
"..."
"..."
"...okay, keep your secrets. You know I could just crack your head open sometime and have a look myself, right?"
"You won't, though."
"How do you know?"
"You would have done it already."
…..
When she reformed, she realized in an instant that her spike had been removed. For one thing, she could think of it as the spike instead of the nothing without being shocked.
It was horrible. Everything looked too big, too loud, too bright. Her thoughts were a jumble of floating words crashing into each other with nothing there to stop them. And even worse, the memories she had, the humiliation of being ignored and tossed away, the pain of isolation, the fear of Emerald losing control and shattering her just because she could, it all hit at once.
Distantly, she knew that the Orthoclase that was supposed to crush her had brought her somewhere else instead, and indeed she was there and trying to talk to her, but she screamed and dragged herself into the darkest corner she could find, screamed and screamed and cried and cried until her vocal cords cracked and didn't work anymore.
Orthoclase put a table in that corner, covered it with a blanket and left her to it.
…..
"Do you ever wish I'd remove the remodeled pearls' spikes?"
"No."
"No? Never? Really?"
"Really."
"But things are better without it, right? I mean, you don't want me to put yours back..."
"No thank you."
"Okay, but you have to tell me why."
"The spike makes it easier to do things that are unpleasant."
"How does that work? As far as I can tell, it gives you constant mass-wide shockings. Doesn't that make things harder?"
"No, it just makes us unable to think about it for too long. It's easier to do some things when you know it won't stay with you."
"Huh. Makes sense."
"..."
"But...hold on, if you don't want me to put your spike back in, then working with me can't be that bad. Do you actually enjoy being here?"
"..."
"Right, stupid question."
…..
When she did eventually recover from her cowering-and-screaming stage, Orthoclase sat in front of the blanket-covered table and introduced herself. She didn't seem to mind that Pearl hadn't managed to put her words in order enough to talk yet, she held the conversation entirely by herself.
"I remodel pearls," she explained. "It's all pretty illegal stuff, so taking you out of the impound is just one more crime I've committed so big deal, right? Anyways, I need an assistant. Someone who's discrete and not afraid to get their hands dirty. Who better than a pearl?"
Remodels.
Pearl had met a few, in Carnelian's home. Some of them had lost the ability to use gesture-speak because of how they had been warped by the remodeller. Some of them had had their gems and masses whittled down to near-shattering. If pearls were capable of hate, then they hated remodellers above all else. They had the power to take away what little the pearls had to themselves.
"It's dangerous work," Orthoclase continued. "We get tracer-rigged pearls sometimes, among other things. Though if I did get caught they'd probably just sell you on. Luckily, I've never been caught."
She rattled on, oblivious to how Pearl was filling up with loathsome fury.
This gem was not just happy to desecrate pearls, but she actually expected Pearl to help her do these things to her fellow pearls.
No. Not me. Never.
She could never deprive a pearl of gesture-speak. She'd shatter herself first.
Or shatter her. She'd never remodel another pearl if I shattered her.
"Take your time," Orthoclase finished, getting up. "We don't have any jobs right now, so whenever you're ready to come out I'll be waiting."
I will bring an end to you, for the sake of all pearls.
…..
"Okay, so we have another one incoming. It's got an inner scribe, looks like Jade's work. She's getting sloppy."
"Wasn't she arrested?"
"That was last orbit. She was released about...thirty cycles ago. Maybe she got banged up in there, who knows. Either way, this is amateur stuff. Poor thing's glitching like crazy."
"..."
"Okay, I know that look."
"What look?"
"That look you always give me when you want me to block pain receptors. You can always ask, you know."
…..
She planned to shatter Orthoclase when her attention was somewhere else, but Orthoclase was constantly in a state of readiness that belied her carefree, almost lazy manner. Catching her off guard was near impossible. There was really only one pocket of time when her focus was completely on something else, and that was when she was whittling a pearl's internal frame.
If she could grab the scalpel from her, one quick jab to the neck would cause her to release her form. Then she could use the tools in the workshop to shatter her gem. Finally she would destroy herself by getting into the chloride barrel at the back of the workshop. No way was she going back on the market.
But before the newest whittling project, Orthoclase left the workshop to pick up extra supplies. She left Pearl alone with the remodel job.
"Will you take my memories for me?" the pearl gesture-spoke.
"Of course."
"Right, let's get this started," Orthoclase said, throwing down her supplies on the operating table.
The pearl was sedated, half-aware of what was happening as Orthoclase opened her chest and stomach and Pearl held the folds of her mass away from the frame. Orthoclase peered inside and whistled low.
"This is a mess," she muttered. "Definitely Spinel's work, she must have lost a chunk in iso-pod."
"It hurts," the pearl said, fluttering her fingers gently.
"Poor thing shouldn't even be able to walk, let alone work," Orthoclase continued. "Let's get you back on your feet before we do anything else."
Pearl paused, wondering if she had heard correctly. It was so odd to hear a gem sympathizing with a pearl that she nearly dropped the folds she was holding.
With a few tucks and solders, Orthoclase put the remodeled pearl back together. When she was finished, the remodelled pearl opened her hand and stretched her fingers. To any other gem, she hadn't done anything. To a pearl, it was like she was weeping with relief.
"Betcha that feels better, right?" Orthoclase quipped. "Get your owner to send you to me next time."
It occurred then to Pearl that there were many other remodellers on Homeworld, but none as skilled as Orthoclase. Killing her would just leave the other pearls at the mercy of cheap hacks.
She abandoned her plan on the spot.
…..
Eventually, she learned Orthoclase's trade for herself. For a while she blocked the pain receptors of any pearl that came into the workshop in secret, until Orthoclase found out and then she did it openly. And now, Orthoclase directly asked her what she thought was best for the pearl they were working on.
It wasn't perfect. She hated that gems wanted pearls remodelled, but that would probably never change. She hated doing the jobs, but she hated the thought that some pearls had been send to gems that messed up their masses so badly they couldn't speak with their kin.
Moreover, Orthoclase respected her. She acknowledged her feelings and her opinions, and this shocked Pearl to her core. She didn't know how to feel; it made her uncomfortable, but it also made her feel warm inside. She was at war with herself.
Orthoclase made jokes and comments about not knowing what Pearl was thinking. She couldn't know that Pearl's mind was still such a muddle so long after having her spike removed.