Star Drops

Orihime. The weaving princess. She had always wondered at the reason why she had been named after the star said to appear on the seventh day of the seventh month alongside Kengyuu, the ox herder. Her brother Sora had maintained that it meant she was special, destined for some higher purpose. Being only little at the time, she had merely laughed and said that maybe she was a princess in disguise and one day she would find her own Kengyuu. Back then it seemed like the fairy tales she and Sora read together, such as the legend of Tanabata, could have come to life. They filled her dreams, her world, her heart to the brim with iridescence and magic and adventure.

In time, she realised none of that was true. Her world, despite being greatly dimmed with the passing of Sora, had brightened thanks to the presences of Tatsuki, Ichigo and her other friends. The vivacity that her universe had once held now remained firmly locked away in her mind, only manifesting itself through her wild imagination and spontaneous, frequent flights of fantasy. It acted as an effective armour against reality when it threatened to crush her in its dark embrace just as her golden shield rejected events. It seemed so impenetrable it never occurred to her that it could be shattered and it was – in a cold, colourless place of eternal night. The world came crashing down around her. Her hope died; hollowed out by despair and pain. She knew then that she could not escape what she was; a rogue goddess whose powers were wasted on her, a cursed monster who could weave nothing but misfortune and destruction, a lost princess who would never reunite with her Kengyuu.

It was a realisation that had stayed with her even after it was all over. She had thought that it was possible to bridge the gap separating her and Ichigo but ever since Hueco Mundo it had done nothing but widen into an immense chasm as vast and endless as the Milky Way arching above her in a breathtaking expanse of glittering stars. Orihime supposed she could now truly appreciate the way her namesake had felt in the story when Kengyuu had been out of her reach. Unlike her though, she did not have a boat or a bridge to help her get across. Unlike her, she could not reunite with her beloved. Unlike her, she had no hope of ever doing so again another year should she fail this time. There had never been a chance in the first place.

If that was so, why then, she pondered, was she wandering about alone at the Tanabata Festival in Karakura Town? Perhaps some part of her believed that the goddess would grant her wish. That was impossible of course. She knew that. Yet somehow that troublesome, fickle emotion known as hope had bubbled up again and her heart refused to let it go. Whether it was because everything felt like that night with the clear dark sky, the waxing crescent moon, people walking by like she did not exist, the hustle and bustle being lost on her, she could not say. The sense of deja vu was so great she nearly found herself expecting to look down and see her high school uniform and be able to pass through inanimate objects. Whatever next? She would probably start subconsciously searching for his reiatsu and -

She shook her head furiously. Stop it. There's no way he would be here. Why would he? Her hands curled into fists inside the long sleeves of her light, cotton summer kimono. There I go again...depending on him. A sharp, frustrated sigh escaping her, she picked up the pace.

Something wet landed on her nose. Orihime paused mid-step, her gaze shifting skyward. The moon winked in and out of the grey wisps skudding across the heavens. A light drizzle had begun falling. It looked like even her celestial counterpart would not be meeting her love tonight. Perhaps it was just as well, she mused. The universe had never favoured them after all. They had both failed to keep their promises and had lost the men most precious to them in the process. A melancholy smile touched her lips. It was all so ironic that she would have laughed had she had had the heart to. It was possible she and the star had more in common than she had first thought. Perchance that was the reason they shared the same name; she was the embodiment of everything the princess had failed to do and therefore had inherited her fate. Her eyes stung. So that was what she had ultimately woven - an inevitable destiny devoid of everything but emptiness and solitude.

It was then that Orihime realised where she was. Onose River. The water was calm, almost still, sparkling silver beneath the light of the sickle moon. It was tranquil unlike the noise, bright lights and swirling colours of the festival which had seemed to mock her with their gaiety. That did not stop bittersweet nostalgia from overcoming her however; she might have shared many a good time there with Sora and Tatsuki but it did not change the fact that she had left and returned alone after cutting herself off from everybody. Her vision swam before her as she sank to the ground. She squeezed her eyes shut and bowed her head.

If I were the rain, would I be able to unite the earth and the sky, who in all eternity never mingle? Would I be able to bind two hearts together as one? Questions from long ago – had it really only been months? - echoed from the back of her mind. She had foolishly felt at that time that she understood Ichigo. Yet another mistake. She knew with hindsight she would never do so, especially not after what had occurred on the dome of Las Noches. She had committed one of the most detrimental acts of her life and did not dare to think what would have happened had things worsened beyond the extent to which they had. It was because of this, she reflected, that the distance that had always been between him and her stretched farther than ever before. She did not deserve to be in his presence. She never had. That was why the notion she could resemble rain would not come to pass and was nothing more than a pipe dream. Besides, he hated it.

Unbidden, the tears overflowed. Orihime tried in vain to suppress the sobs threatening to burst from her lips but to no avail. What did it matter? It was not like anybody but the heavens would hear her. Her posture sagged in defeat as she let herself get swept away by the wave of emotions. She felt as if she was slowly sinking in a deep dark ocean and found that she welcomed it. If it allowed her to get away from it all, then she would be more than happy to plunge into its murky depths.

"Orihime," came the voice she knew so well. Too well.

Her heart lurched at the sound of her name falling from his lips. Her mind raced.

He was there. Alone with her.

She had to admit, she had been partly expecting to see him on the other side of the river when she had arrived but not to find her like this. She buried her head in her hands, fighting down the lump rising in her dry throat and choking back the fresh flood about to cascade down her cheeks. Why here? Why now of all times?

She did not react when he knelt down beside her, remaining silent. I can't face him.

"Orihime." He uttered it with such aching tenderness her heart twisted.

Her shoulders shook. She mentally cursed. The mere mention of her name was almost enough to send her back over the edge and to break her wavering, fragile self-control. But she had to keep it together. She could not afford to make any more mistakes, to fail, to be useless any longer.

Yet when he took hold of her wrists in a firm but gentle grasp and pulled her hands away from her face, she could not resist. Her limbs instantly relaxed as a reflex. She bit her lip in irritation, for it seemed that even her own body was intent on betraying her in his presence. His grip on her wrists was sending bolts of lightning down her spine which did not help matters and it felt like it was burning her; she forced down the urge to shiver at the sensation. That did not prevent her pulse from quickening nor her breaths from becoming hitched in her throat from the close contact though. She was therefore powerless to stop herself from obliging at his request for her to look at him. It was as if his voice had bewitched her, hypnotised her.

The world slid away the moment brown met grey. Beneath the shock of orange hair and concerned scowl, brooding mahogany had flared to a smouldering amber, a violent storm of emotion raging in the turbulent depths. Anger. Fear. Anguish. Sadness. Anxiety. Uncertainty. Ardour. Resolve. Something else she could not place.

She could not tear her gaze away from his no matter how much she wanted to. Those intense, burning pools bore deep into her own as if searching for something. The scrutiny was unrelenting, his presence intoxicating. It would be so easy to forget herself and get lost in his stare, so simple to just give in and lean against his temptingly sturdy, strong form; to rest her head on his chest and let the reassuring heartbeat in her ear lull her into sweet oblivion. She remained stock still, held in place by his encompassing gaze as if spellbound.

Ichigo exhaled, averting his eyes. He relinquished his grasp on her wrists. His hands dropped despondently to his lap. He watched her limp arms fall to her sides as she blinked slowly like she was waking up from a long deep slumber.

When coherent thought returned to her, Orihime found that she felt strangely light-headed. Ragged breaths came out in short, shallow gasps. Her heart beat a mile a minute and the blood pounded in her ears. Her chest throbbed with a sharp pang. Her body felt feeble, weak. It was like being subjected to such a profound, penetrating gaze had sapped all of her strength. She was helpless to stop the tears she had valiantly fought back from spilling over and felt them roll down her face. Somehow she still retained some of her dignity as she was inwardly pleased to discover that no sobs made it past her mouth despite the fact she was shaking harder than before. She turned her eyes on the glistening grass, refusing to look at him again, her teardrops mixing with those of the sky. All that could be heard was a deafening silence that seemed to drown out everything including the pitter-patter of rain and the gurgling ebb and flow of the river.

"Sorry I'm so late." He broke the stillness.

Her eyes clamped shut and her face contorted. What was he apologising for? He had done nothing wrong. If anything, she was to blame for all of this. If only she was not such a failure. If only she was stronger. If only -

"I thought it would be better if we had some space but I was wrong," he admitted. "It's made things worse."

She shook her head vehemently. No. No! Don't blame yourself. It's me who's at fault.

"Don't deny it, Orihime." His voice was quiet, bitter. "I've hurt you. Hell, scared you." She heard the rustle of cotton as he fisted his kimono. "Not just this time either. It's been happening for much longer than that and I haven't been there when you needed me. If I had, then you wouldn't have felt you had been left to deal with things alone and been taken to Hueco Mundo."

Stop. Stop it!

He drew in a shuddering breath, as if trying to keep himself in check. "I'm not going to break my promise ever again. I won't let you face it all by yourself."

"No!" blurted Orihime.

He was taken aback.

"This is all my fault! It's because I'm weak and useless and selfish. I've let you down so many times and burdened you with my lack of resolve. I don't deserve anything you - "

Ichigo placed a finger to her lips, silencing her. His gaze was stern. "You're one of the most selfless people I have ever met. The way you always smile and stay positive for everyone when things get tough is something I have never been able to do. Your powers have made even somebody like Aizen fear them and saved our lives on loads of occasions." He removed his finger and put it under her chin, tilting her head upward so her eyes would meet his. "If it wasn't for you, we wouldn't be around today. Your strength comes from here"- he laid his other hand across her chest - "and that makes you the strongest out of all of us. Don't put yourself down like that."

She opened her mouth to protest. "But I - "

"No," he interrupted. "I mean it. It's true." His stare hardened, making any other objections she wanted to voice die in her throat. "I've failed you. The time we spent not talking to each other made me realise that as well as how we were keeping it all in. I want to make it up to you...but I don't know if I ever will."

Hearing his voice so full of self-reproach and guilt pained her. She was the one meant to be saying things like this, not the other way around. Why could he not see that? How could he insist that none of what she had told him was the truth when in reality it was the opposite? Surely he knew that and had said what he did out of pity; there was no way he could have meant it. Even so, a part of her argued, his gaze had seemed sincere as had his tone. But that doesn't mean I deserve it, she thought. He's being so kind to me, it hurts. He shouldn't put himself out for me, let alone blame himself for my sake.

He went on, breaking through her mental wallowing. "I did a lot of thinking this past month or so and I often remembered about when I had first discovered you had been kidnapped." His eyes glazed over. "You had always been there even before we actually knew each other and when we did, I still didn't notice it. You became part of everything. It was like one moment you were there and the next you had gone." He released her chin, dragging a hand through the vivid, scruffy locks of his hair. "I guess I had taken it for granted. Everything was so screwed up without you. I wasn't myself. I...I was lost."

Orihime's watery grey eyes grew wide. Wait...what? Ichigo was -

"It all came at me at once," he recalled. "I had never felt so angry, scared and worried before. I decided I didn't want to feel that way any longer than I had to and went out to get you back. But even then I couldn't keep you with me and uphold the promise I had made. Remembering that made me realise something else."

His eyes snapped shut, his scowl almost etched into his face. "You mean a lot to me and I..."

His jaw tightened and his teeth clenched.

"I...I..." He swallowed hard.

"I...don't want to lose you again," he choked out.

A sound halfway between a sob and a gasp escaped her. This was too much.

Her tears flowed faster than ever and sobs racked her body. It felt like her chest was being torn apart. "I-Ichigo...I-I'm so sorry. I...I b-brought this on you. I don't...d-deserve to be here...with y-you n-now."

The emotion she had not been able to recognise in his eyes before returned. "You're wrong. That's - "

"I'm sorry." She turned away from him. "I have to go."

She made to get to her feet but he caught her wrist in a solid, unyielding grip. She struggled against him even though she knew full well it was futile, sobbing harder. "Let me g - "

"Stay."

"No!" she refused in a broken voice.

"Please."

She froze.

He had said it in a coarse whisper but the rawness of the tone had been painfully palpable. Her chest constricted.

She fell to her knees, becoming limp in his hold. The last of her energy had been taken away.

Maybe he was right. Maybe he needed this. Maybe she needed this.

Ichigo took her by the shoulders and steered her so she faced him. He regarded her with that same unidentifiable emotion, his eyes now the colour of warm chocolate. His ever-present, prominent scowl had smoothed out. His reiatsu, no longer filled with regret and self-loathing, covered her like a favourite blanket, steadfast and secure. She let herself bask in it briefly, attempting with difficulty to stem the tears and sobs as he squeezed her shoulders. Seeing this, he drew her against him and wrapped his arms around her.

Orihime gave up on fighting back her sorrow and let it all out. She rambled about everything she had kept inside ever since she had fallen in love with him. He listened intently to every word, whispering reassurances. Her tears soaked his kimono. Her sobs were muffled by his chest. His embrace never phased and his hands rubbed her back in comforting circles. The feeling of being in his arms was both thrilling and relaxing at the same time. It felt so right yet somehow surreal.

"This...this isn't a dream, right? Y-You're not going to disappear, are you?" she wanted to know, voice getting caught in a sob. She shook like a leaf in the wind.

Ichigo's arms tightened around her trembling frame.

"Shh," he soothed softly. "I'm not going anywhere without you from now on. That's a promise."

She let out a long sigh, listening to his heartbeat and closing her eyes. "I'm glad. Thank you." She knew that after this, he would endeavour to uphold his vows no matter what.

"Look." Ichigo's murmur brought her out of a peaceful doze a short time later. "It stopped."

Orihime lifted her head from his chest to shift her gaze to the heavens. Sure enough, the clouds had vanished. The stars Altair and Vega shone proudly, twinkling brightly like diamonds against deep blue velvet.

A relieved and elated giggle. "So Orihime and Kengyuu were able to reunite after all."

Ichigo chuckled quietly. "Yeah."

She glanced back at him to see a faint smile spread across his face. Her heart nearly stopped, it was so beautiful. It was like a sunbeam after a storm. His eyes found hers and the gentle smile became clearer. She flashed him one of her own in return. It outshone the starlight.

"Let's go and make a wish!" she suggested. "Then you can wish for an ox and a farm and red bean crops to make red bean paste so the aliens will be put off and won't invade and - "

"Okay, I get it," Ichigo grinned, stopping her mid-flow before she could go off on one of her completely crazy tangents. He gave her a mocking scowl that made her burst out laughing.

As she led him by the hand back to the festival, Orihime reasoned that perhaps the threads she had woven were not those of bad luck or devastation but instead the bonds between her and people important to her; for even when she and Ichigo were worlds apart they had been connected at the heart. The distance between them had been closing from the start, only she had never realised it.

In the same way fate had reunited the lovers of Tanabata, the rain had bound their hearts to be as one forever. Truly, it seemed their love had been written in the stars all along. They had just needed to find each other. Now she could weave her own tale at Ichigo's side and a new, living Tanabata legend would begin.