Disclaimer: Not a single character in here is mine, all owned by those beautiful folk at Marvel. I don't make any money. The Fan Fic references used herein are also, not mine. This has sexual, sorta, conduct.
Thanks to all the authors who created the stories thrown into my Fan Fic broth. I really can't be specific because I don't remember even the titles of most I've used, but if your in here you'll know it. Thank you.
"And Now, This" by D. Calme
It was a fair weather, enthusiastically bright day. One of those days when one could, conceivably, lie about in a field surrounded by wild flowers and dandy loins sprouts, searching through patches for four leaf clovers. If a casual observer came by and watched, they would wonder why one would lie about with fleas, ticks, and other nasty critters sucking at their blood, surrounded by weeds, while they got skin cancer, and all in the search for mutant plant life. That casual observer wouldn't be to romantic, would he.
Jean Grey, the mutant extraordinare', stepped into the living room quarters of the Xavier mansion to find Gambit, the Cajun extraordinare', in raptured by a print out sheet, which was, in her opinion, quite ordinary. He stood by the their new PC absolutely still, while she watched chewing on her cuticles, as it was her secret nervous habit. Finally, giving up the hope he might go through the trouble of telling her what was up, she walked over to him and glanced over his shoulder not really reading what she saw and said, "Looks pretty interesting, is it erotica? You know how much I enjoy erotica" While she may not have said exactly that, and may not really have that much of an obsession with the written words of pleasure, you basically get the gist of it.
And to that he simply said, "I'm gay."
"What? I mean.... What?!"
"Gay... I'm a homosexual... I don' see how I missed it before, dis silly accent, the funny way I walk.... Why I constantly watch Logan during his work outs..."
"Remy... when did you come to this revelation?"
"A minute ago...", said he. He looked up, as if startled. His red on black target eyes caught hers and held them, as if seeing her for the first time. "I tink I love you, chere'"
She blinked at him, stepping back pushing him away lightly. "I thought you just said you were gay..."
He shrugged, said "It was a phase, I'm over it now.. I want you.." and moved to kiss her, apparently forgetting she was not only married but destined to have children with the man she married. And of course she gave him that familiar, forceful slap he must have gotten a thousand times with his bad French accent and worse pick up lines.. She stormed out of the room, about to go into a search for her husband and heard gambit behind her... He was reading over that print paper, now muttering about some unprofessed love for Bobby Drake..
She rushed up the hall towards the danger room, hoping to find her husband there. Why she didn't just use her powers to locate him, is a reason so complex it could only be explained in a 10 page essay, written in Latin, and let's face it, none of us have time for that. So if plot holes bother you, best drop this story right now... That was your first and final warning.
She happened to bump into rogue as she went, knocking a cell phone from her hand. "Ohh, I'm sorry Rogue.. Have you seen Scott? It's important"
"No, I haven't... But I had heard he's been spending allot of time at the Massachusetts academy, giving some kind of tutoring to Penance.. That girl sure needs allot of help, he's over there every night, it seems...", as she began to dial up on the aforementioned cell phone.
Jean shuddered, suddenly having the last piece to a puzzle that had been bothering her for days... The mysterious scars that "showed up" on Scotts penis.. "That rat bastard...", she thought, "That cradle robbing rat bastard... That scum sucking, cradle robbing rat bastard... That.." Well her chain of thought went on like this for some 5 more minute, but for the sake of short attention spans, including my own, we'll skip it. Finally, she realized something was, quite simply, wrong. When something was wrong, they harassed the Professor until it was fixed. Gambit, Gay? Scott, cheating? And why did she have the strangest impulse to run off and marry Logan? Jean pushed her way pasted Rogue's enormous breasts and headed towards the kitchen... Why? Again, don't ask.
If Jean had stopped to ask Rogue where her accent had gone, she wouldn't have gotten a very interesting answer, but she had no time to even notice Rogue's accent-deprived state, otherwise she'd have made the time to thank God. And, if she had any more spare moments, find a cure to Gambit's affliction.
She came into the kitchen, falling into a trot as she glanced at Jubilee... Why wasn't at the academy? That's right, don't ask. I think your starting to see the pattern here... The girl sat picking at a bowl of cereal in absolute misery. This wasn't your normal, "Why won't Everett just make out with me, hell I'd give him my virginity if he really wanted it", kind of misery.. No, this was something else. She stopped in her mad rush to see the wonderful Professor of X and went to place a hand on Jubilee's shoulder. She gave a half hearted "What's wrong, dear", hoping the teen would buy it. She did. "I've been having these dreams.. These twisted nightmares about.." She shook her head, unable to let it out. Well, it was obvious that the girl needed more than 2 minutes worth of counseling, in