Disclaimer: Don't own Jan or Hellsing. Wish I owned Jan, butI don't. So, alas... sadly, all I own is this fic.
Not a Care in the World
What was he doing here? Why was he sitting in this bus filled with groaning ghouls? Why did it seem like right now everything depended on Luke's simple command? What in the hell was he thinking? Why was he ready to go through with invading the Hellsing house like this? What was it about this whole mission that called out to him? Those questions pounded against his skull every now and then.
He waited impatiently, ignoring every single question that popped into his mind. But, even he had to admit, this idea was pretty ridiculous. Even if this whole thing was a mission for the Millenium Group, it was ridiculous. Idiotic, absurd, suicidal even. There was no way in hell they'd survive this, even with the army of ghouls they had and the ones they intended to add to their ranks. And that was probably why he was anticipating this mission so much. It was a complete mind fuck. Everything they had planned, he knew would back-fire in their faces. Sure, they were smart, they planned things out pretty damn well... But really, what good's a mind against brute force and strength and an Ancient Vampire?
He didn't care. It was the thrill that mattered, not the consequences. That's how it always was. From the moment he had the FREAK Chip implanted in him, up until this moment he was living now. Nothing else mattered except the thrill. Adrenaline was a drug more addictive than the ones he regularly took back at their Vampire Fetish bar. Owning the bar was fine and dandy, but after a while... things got old. The same old faces, the same old routines... It all got so damn old so fucking fast. But this... this was what he'd been looking for since he had the Chip put inside his body. The craziest ploy in the world, the most absurd plan to come to mind; the ultimate thrill ride.
All of the "whats" and "whys" rang continually throughout this mind. They echoed, and he ignored them. Empty human questions plaguing a crazed inhumane mind. It didn't matter. That's what he kept telling himself. Drown out the questions with ignorance, and ignore the human appeal to them. He wasn't in this to question his actions or regret anything he'd done or was about to do. He was here for the ride of his un-life. Who cared if he died today? He sure as hell didn't. He'd be going out with a bang if he did, he'd make sure of that.
The only thing that seemed to be getting the better of him at the moment was his impatience. He wanted to do this. God he was getting high from the adrenaline already. It really was a horrible addiction, the adrenaline. It clouded his already foggy mind and erased any and all rational thought. This was the one addiction he knew was about to do him in. Call it a hunch, but attacking the Hellsing house--a place filled with an army of its own and a Vampire or two--just spelt out "death wish" for the Valentine brothers and their small army of ghouls. But, damn, talk about a wild ride and exhilarating high! Nothing in this world or the next would make Jan Valentine back out of this.
"Oh, Jan, I think it's time to start the tour," Luke's voice rang out, finally. No more waiting. The younger Valentine grinned behind the wheel of the bus. He started the ignition, floored the petal and headed straight for the gate without a care in the world, fueled by pure, crazed adrenaline.
-End