Disclaimer: I don't own Fairly OddParents.

Author's Note: Constructive criticism welcomed, particularly on characterization. In addition, I've also written a smutty Norm/Crocker ONESHOT and I'm not sure if smut is allowed since I heard both that it is and that it isn't. The ONESHOT isn't very graphic in it's descriptions of smutty stuff, so would it be allowed?

Pairing: Norm/Crocker

No Love For Prisons

"Norm!" called Crocker, "I've got a wish for you to grant."

GONG!

Norm appeared, feeling quite grouchy. Crocker had interrupted his sleep.

"What is it, Crockpot?"

Which was why he called Crocker, Crockpot instead of Shock Hot.

"First, I wish had three more wishes," said Crocker, "Then, I wish I ruled the world and everyone was enslaved to me."

GONG!

"Three more wishes, sure," said Norm, "But I don't like your last one. One: Ruling the world always fails because the common people rebel (I can't blame them for that. Dictators aren't pleasant rulers, I should know–I met millions of them.) Two: I kinda have issues with slavery."

Norm gestured to his lava lamp.

Crocker remembered how Norm set the fairy free at the Fairy Café. Norm definitely seemed not to like slavery. Crocker wondered if Norm would reject him for this. Ruling the world and having millions of people as slaves was Crocker's lifelong dream ever since he starting getting rejected regularly.

"Yeah, I don't like most humans," continued Norm, "But, you enslaving them all would probably tap in bad psychological issues I don't want to revisit – and it'll make me fear that you'll do that to me and I'll just become another toy to you, another tool to use for your own ends."

Crocker was surprised that Norm would think that. He thought Norm liked him, loved him, thought him handsome and trusted him. Apparently, he didn't do two out of three. Crocker tried to kiss and fondle Norm, but Norm refused his touch.

"Ya just want me because I'm a good date, a good kisser, a good stress ball and am capable of granting your wishes. Am I right?"

"No," protested Crocker, "You are not right."

"Well then," said Norm, "Why don't you prove it to me? All I see is a human that is mean to me and likes to use me for their own ends."

Crocker felt like protesting how untrue that was, but couldn't think of anything to say. Norm just seemed bound to think of him as exploitive and mean, regardless of what he did. Crocker considered buying Norm a present, but what could you get someone who could get whatever they wanted in a snap of their fingers?

"Remember what'll happen to you if you reject me," said Crocker.

"Now, you're threatening me," said Norm sardonically, "How sweet. At loose ends because you can't think of a present that I can't GONG up myself? You know, it's possible to make me something yourself."

Crocker thought of how he made all that fairy-hunting equipment. Maybe he could use his skills with mechanics and electronics to design a gift for Norm. But, what would Norm want?

Norm gazed at him. Crocker wondered if he was imagining the sadness in the genie's eyes. Norm did want him; they were just having a spat, Crocker reminded himself.

Norm felt irritated by Crocker's exploitive meanness, yet somehow Norm felt sad. Norm told himself that it was crazy that he was sad over Crocker. Still, he did feel something. And Crocker's threat of being in trouble if he rejected him certainly convinced that not rejecting Crocker would be a good idea. However, again, it also was evidence of exploitive meanness.

Crocker went into the Crocker Cave and looked at all his fairy hunting stuff. None of it looked like a good gift for Norm, a gift that said, "I actually care about you and don't want to exploit you. I'm sorry."

Norm would never call him a Shock Hot again, never kiss him, and never date him if he couldn't think of a good gift. Crocker would be rejected again, just like he was since he was ten. Crocker knew Norm wanted his freedom, but he didn't want to give him up just yet.

Crocker heard the bell ring. It was time for him to teach children and be mean to them (the latter being his own choice.) He left the Crocker Cave and went into the classroom.

The children looked at Crocker in confusion. He looked kinda sad, not sadistic like usual.

"EVERYONE F!" yelled Crocker, "I FEEL TOO DEPRESSED TO ACTUALLY LOOK AT YOUR WORK BEFORE I MARK IT AND YOU DO ALL GET Fs ANYWAY!"

Norm groaned. Get into a spat with a guy one time and he goes to Emoville.

"How 'bout I teach then?" asked Norm, "You need a break."

Crocker was thrilled. He didn't have to be in the same room as the little brats and Norm showed signs of still liking him.

Then, Crocker remembered how he theorized that there was a love fairy. Maybe he could ask him for help. Luckily, Crocker had a Fairy World portal in the Crocker Cave. He dropped down in the Crocker Cave and went through the portal.

"Where's the fairy of love?"

"What?" teased a fairy, "Having problems getting laid?"

Crocker was infuriated. Fairies, humans, they were all the same. Then, he thought of Norm. After he and Crocker had defeated Turner, he had dated him, kissed him, fondled him and called him Shock Hot. He was here for Norm and he wouldn't let any taunts stop him.

Fairy World amazed Crocker. The Fairy Café was only a sliver of its wonders.

"Cupid!" called Crocker, saying the name of the first love deity that came to mind, "I need your help!"

LOVE POOF!

"What is it?" asked the fairy that appeared, "Is someone having love difficulties?"

"Yes, I love my genie, Norm, but he thinks I only want to exploit him," said Crocker, "How do I convince him otherwise?"

"The Fairy Dating Game? A personalized gift? One of my Love Arrows?"

"Norm did seem to ask me for a personalized gift," said Crocker, "But what?"

"Genies hate smoof," said Cupid, "Maybe, you could make him something smoof-resistant."

"If he can resist smoof, he'll be free and I'll lose him forever," said Crocker, "I'll never get anymore kisses or dates or fondling. I'll never have anyone who finds me surprisingly handsome."

Cupid sort of felt sorry for Denzel. He didn't know Denzel could be that sensitive.

"Denzel, if Norm decides he doesn't want you, I'll set you up with Waxelplax."

Crocker wasn't sure if he wanted Waxelplax anymore, but considering his problem with her was how she always rejected him, Cupid using his magic to set him up with her would solve all his problems with her.

"You have a deal," said Crocker.

"Here are some magical device parts," said Cupid, "You might need them."

Crocker was LOVE POOFed back into the Crocker Cave with the parts. He examined them and starting putting them all together. After a while, Crocker had built a beautiful ring that helped the wearer resist smoof. He left the Crocker Cave and went to see Norm, who was teaching the class magic instead of math. Not that they'd be able to use it.

"Norm, I have a gift for you," said Crocker, showing Norm the ring.

"A ring? Are we getting engaged or something?"

"No, though if you wanted to, we could be," replied Crocker, "The wearer of this ring is capable of resisting smoof."

Norm smiled and put it on. Crocker didn't want to exploit him and was willing to give up control of him for love.

"You know, I don't have to grant your wishes anymore," said Norm, kissing Crocker, "But ya wouldn't have it any other way, would you?"

"What's ruling the world worth if I don't have you there too?" flirted Crocker, "And I'm sure you'd grant my wishes anyway?"

"You've gotta kiss me for them though," teased Norm, "Now, I'm resistant to smoof, I won't grant just anyone's wishes, will I?"

"That's a fair trade," agreed Crocker, "I want kisses from you too, you know."

"I know," replied Norm, kissing him again.