This is a post-BSG mini, and includes the first episode up to and including episode 5. For some reason I am in an introspective Adama mood lately. Reviews are always appreciated, but flames will be used to lower my heating bill G>.Glen Larson and Ron Moore own BSG.

"Betrayed"

By Capt Kathy "Doc"

Commander William Adama

I was a man betrayed, or so I thought.

I was betrayed by the Admirals of Picon Fleet for expressing my views regarding our increasing reliance on computers. I continued to remind them of the lessons learned in our first war with the Cylons. However, an unholy alliance between our military leaders and politicians resulted in progressively more sophisticated and apparently more lethal battlestars that all held the same fatal flaw. As newer battlestars became more reliant on integrated computer systems, they were also more open to Cylon attack.

My vocal opposition ended hopes I had of further military advancement, and so I was destine to end my career as Commander of the Galactica, or as some said, Commander of the "Flying Museum".

I was betrayed by the very organization I had given my life, my marriage and eventually my son to. Or so I thought at the time.

Now that I think on it again, they did me a favor. Here I stand in command of the lone surviving Battlestar and protector of the remnants of humanity while all the Admirals of Picon Fleet are now dead, every one of them.

But that wasn't the only betrayal I had to endure. I was betrayed by my own son.

In a quiet cemetery over Zac's casket, Lee flung his brother's death in my face, blaming me for pushing Zac into a Viper and to his death. We didn't speak again until years later when we met at Galactica's decommissioning. His hatred hadn't abated. My ex-wife always used to say Adama men give new meaning to the word "stubborn" so it shouldn't have surprised me that Lee had never forgiven me and had instead elected to once again throw Zac's death in my face.

I was furious, but everything changed when I saw Lee's ship destroyed by a Cylon bomb. A part of me died too when I thought Lee had been killed, but I carried on for my ship and my crew. I only really began to live again when Saul informed me Lee was still alive. I had been given a second chance.

But did I use it? No. At Ragnar, instead of trying to make amends with Lee, I didn't talk to him and settled for a hug. Later, I played the Commander and sent Lee away rather than talking to him. So I shouldn't have been surprised when Lee betrayed me by agreeing to serve as the President's Personal Advisor on Military Matters. It hurt me to think she might have a greater hold on his allegiance than his own father. Although I had pushed Lee away, and pushed him to choose a side in this struggle between me and our new President, I had hoped he'd pick my side. Instead he chose to work with her as an advisor, my betrayer. What secrets did he whisper in her ear to help her past the chinks in my armor? My own flesh and blood had turned "traitor". Or so I thought.

I was also betrayed by the woman I had considered my daughter for the last two years.

When I first met Kara Thrace, I could see how much she loved Zac. I could see the pain in her eyes as we talked. Had things been different, she would have been my daughter. And what a daughter. Kara was a born pilot and the more I got to know her the more I realized that she was like me in so many ways. So eventually Kara became my "daughter" to fill the void created by Zac's death, a last link to Zac and a replacement for Lee. For two years we talked about everything. I thought there were no secrets between us. After that accident on Galactica's flight deck, I knew taking over the role of flight instructor would be hard for her, a reminder of bitter memories she would have preferred buried. However, I was sure I could convince her to put aside her issues regarding Zac and do her job. While Lee was at times a mystery to me, I thought I knew Kara Thrace.

I was confused when Lee hinted that Kara was feeling guilty over her part in what happened to Zac. His heartfelt and frustrated plea of, "Dad, just talk to her," stopped my further questioning. Once confronted, she confessed that Zac "didn't have the chops to fly a viper," yet she had passed him.

I have always prided myself on my ability to control my emotions. Yet, when Kara admitted her role in my son's death, only the part of me who is the Commander kept me in control. While I could see the love, hurt and regret in her eyes over Zac it meant nothing to me. I could only think that she had lied to me all those years and it was almost too much to bear. Thank the Lords she took my order to leave before I lost what little control I had and hurt her. How I kept my hands from around her neck is beyond me. I had been betrayed by my son and now by my "daughter."

I was a man betrayed by the military and then by my "family." Or so I thought.

I made her train those recruits. Then I stood in CIC wallowing in my anger until I listened over the wireless as she sacrificed herself to save the rookie pilots. In that moment I would have taken it all back to have Kara safe and sound on the Galactica.

Why is it you never realize how much you have until you loose it? I thought I had lost everything that mattered, and that it was all over.

But that wasn't true at all. Lee, the traitorous son who I thought hated me, was suddenly by my side. He backed me even when the President and Saul turned against our continued search for Starbuck. We were united with a single purpose to find Starbuck and bring her home.

I realized how far away I had pushed Lee when he asked me if I would do the same for him. I told him the truth. If Lee had been lost, we never would have left, as long as I was in command. I'm only human and make mistakes, but I don't make the same mistakes twice. After I told him that and turned away I silently resolved to let Lee know how much I loved and respected him. But the improvement in my relationship with Lee was overshadowed by Kara's continued absence. I had gained my son, but may have lost my "daughter."

Both Lee and I had looked for Kara the best we could. Lee flew his Viper, and I remained in CIC directing "rescue" operations. When President Roslyn and Colonel Tigh confronted Lee and I in my quarters, we already knew that remaining here to look for Kara was dangerous and exposed the fleet to Cylon detection. Even though Lee and I agreed, he still handed me the com unit to make that final call to CIC ordering the fleet to prepare for a FTL jump. A few minutes later, I stood in CIC itself watching the Galactica begin her final jump prep when a lone Cylon Raider suddenly appeared on DRADUS. Fortunately most of the fleet had already jumped.

Lee was the only fighter able to launch due to mechanical failures. I know Lee is a great pilot, but I still prayed to the Lords for him to return safely to the Galactica. Listening in CIC, I recognized that the job wasn't as easy as it should have been. Whoever or whatever was flying that Raider was good, very good. When Lee announced he'd lost the Raider, I was sure it was his doom, and I waited.

I have no words to describe what I felt when he shouted over the com that the words "Star" and "Buck" were written on the underside of that Cylon Raider. The military man in me said, "No time to relax yet, it could still be a Cylon trap." However, the father in me prayed it was really her.

I have finally returned to my quarters after visiting Kara in sick bay. Not so long ago I thought I was a man alone and betrayed by those I loved most. Now I realize that I haven't been betrayed at all. While Lee is still the President's Personal Advisor, he is still my son, and while Kara passed Zac in training, to blame her totally for his death is wrong. He wanted to fly, and there were several other instructors that should have seen his inadequacies. Why in the Lords' names had his fiancée been grading him anyway? I still have to deal with Zac's death, but I have already forgiven Kara. I find it's better to rejoice in a living son and "daughter," than mourn a dead son.

In truth I wasn't betrayed at all.

End