~A/N I do NOT own any of the wrestlers hereby mentioned in this story [I WISH] NOR do I claim rights to any of their names or the WWE. This is purely fictional. But, you already knew that! Song is also NOT mine, it is from the band Dead By April and the song is called Losing You. I recommend listening to it while reading that part! Enjoy! This is my first time publishing here, BUT certainly NOT my first WWE Slash story! ;) WARNINGS: STRONG LANGUAGE AND SLASHY H/J [Also: I know there are misspellings, but I imagine this is how they talk/think! '=thinking]~
Save Me, I'm Alone:
I Need To Run From You
CM Punk shifted on his locker room bench, fidgety from yet another weird ending to RAW. It wasn't about the whole thing with Kevin Nash returning at Summerslam from seemingly out of nowhere to take him out like an over-aged assassin hired by a corrupt system. No, Punk was cool with that, he was cool with fighting a regimental system that was seemingly hellbent on controlling what he could do or say and even daring to claim that the changes happening within the WWE now were THEIR doing, not his.
Punk huffed out the irritable breath he was holding in and ran his hand through his short cropped hair, slightly mussing it. 'Fuck,' he thought in confusion, 'what's bugging the hell out of me is…how fucking weird Cena's been acting lately. I mean…hell…he should be MAD at me…HATE me. Not…palling around with me and…even letting me join in on his little attackfest on Del Rio and his little Ricky's ass. It's like…he's been WAYYY too happy to be around me lately,hell…he even walked out of the ring WITH me tonight…I wonder…' Punk held his head in his hands, feeling a headache coming on and wondered whether he should go get a Pepsi. It's not as though he hated John, no, what he told John was the truth. He did like him more than any of the other guys in the locker room. He just never thought it'd get returned by John or the possibility that they could even be friends.
Punk sighed out, "I really could use a friend since me and Randal broke up. But…I just never thought…of me and Cena being friends…" Getting up and slinging his bag over his shoulder, he walked towards his door only to hear a soft, almost timid knock. Punk tilted his head in confusion, muttering,"Who the fuck could that be? Thought everyone left already…" Curiosity won out over confusion and he reached out to open the door with an almost shaky hand, blinking in shock as he looked up into the almost shy looking blue eyes of John Cena himself. Punk saw John gulp hard as he muttered, "Hey,man. Um…ya know…meant that in the ring and stuff earlier. Soo…ya know…was kinda cool to have worked with ya so far. So,I mean…I just…don't really want that to just…end like that. Soo…thought maybe…if ya want…we can go chill somewhere,man? Thought it'd be cool to get to know ya, Punk,ya look like you could…use a friend too. I kinda know…what happened with you and…Randy. I mean…he is still my best friend. Soo…I dunno…was just…extendin…the damn hand or…somethin…of…friendship…peace, maybe? Please?"
Punk looked down at John's shoes, wishing John hadn't touched that sore spot of him and Randy's recent brake up and growled out softly, "Cena…pouring salt in my fucking wounds so far does not put much points in my book for you! Also,you being so close to…R…Randal…I…am not so sure…if we can…co-exist as is, Cena. And yes, I know…R…Randal…is on Smackdown now,but…I just…can't…I…" Punk gulped down the tears, not wanting John to see him do this. Punk then stiffened as he felt John give him an actual friendly hug, screwing up his face against the howl of misery that wanted to pour forth from him like a river. He knew he still wasn't over Randy and that he needed some kind of human contact or support. He couldn't hold it in anymore and for once in his life, CM Punk broke down into John Cena's shoulder as the tears silently soaked into the man's bright red shirt.
He felt John's hand rubbing his back softly and rubbed his face more into John's incredible warmth, feeling ridiculously safe now for some warped reason. But, Punk felt the man's warmth start to seep more into him and it made him feel incredibly aroused too. Punk did not want to show that to John though and disgust him, so he pulled away with a low whimper of loss that he hoped to hell John would not hear. John just smiled down at him and murmured low, "There…ya look loads better now, man…glad I could help, Punk. I'll always…ya know…be here for ya…if ya need…the support, man. I know how it feels too,still kinda gettin over Wade here,I know..." He laughed out sardonically, "It was messed up…but hell…he was…good to me…till…that…soo…ya…I feel ya, man…" Punk nodded and cleared his throat, hoping he wouldn't show his burning desire through his voice,"Yes,well…I never really…understood that myself, Cena. But, I can see where you…are coming from. Th…thank you…look…can we just…go? I am…quite tired…" John once again looked down at him with those sparkling blue eyes and Punk had to hold down his over active libido, knowing friends did not just randomly fuck at the drop of a hat.
John chuckled out, "Ya…sure,man! Ya do look kinda beat…how bout we just have a quick dinner somewhere? Then…I dunno…go back to our rooms to chill, I guess, 'nother long day for me tomorrow…" Punk sighed out, "Don't I know it, Cena…don't I know it. Look…I…don't know what to do with…my car. It IS a rental…should I just…leave it here? Or…we…?" John laughed again, which made Punk somewhat smile almost genuinely, "Ah, who cares, Punker! Ya can ride with me if ya want,seems kinda dumb to take two cars to the same place. I can take ya back to your car in the mornin or if ya want,I can take it back for ya? Two trips aint worth it, man! Who's gonna miss it?" Punk chuckled gravely as he handed his keys over to John,"Very well, Cena…for once…you are actually making sense! Let us leave then, soo lead the way, Superman…heh…" He heard John chuckle again as John's hand now rubbed his lower back, making Punk's spine tingle with an unfamiliar electricity as he actually had to choke down a low moan this time,"Ha…whatever, Punker! Keep up with me then, Batman…ha.." Punk let out his own low chuckle again at John's light hearted joke, feeling a warped kinship with John Cena already.
Punk fidgeted yet again in John's car, wishing he at least had his Rubik's cube to play with. But, it was secure with his bag in John's trunk. But, Punk was very nervous and he had no idea why, he was comfortable with John but at the same time, very anxious. He stole a sideways glance at John's profile as he drove,his face set with concentration. Punk sighed internally in longing without knowing why,'no doubt about one thing, he is incredibly attractive to me…and I…want…to at least…know…what he feels like…I…have not had that…in months…' But, Punk did not want to ruin their new friendship by admitting to John that he had needs that were aching to be met. Plus, he feared John would think it was merely sympathy sex or worse, that he was using his friendship for nothing more than a quickie.
John suddenly whipped his head at him as he stopped at a red light and looked him over carefully, intoning softly in concern,"Hey…Punker…ya look kinda pale…ya ok, man? Come on, man…let's start this right! Ya can be honest and tell me anything...I won't get mad, man. I know ya have the knack for bein brutally honest. But now…you're hidin from me, man. S'ok,Punker…tell me…"
Punk gulped and whimpered low, hating showing weakness but knew somehow that John would not ridicule him, "Oh…C…John…I just…was…kind of looking…and could not help…but think…what it would be like…to…have you take…I mean…I was cur…no…I…just…can't…I want…no…I need…John…I…I…need…you. I…I am sorry…there…I fucking said it…happy now?" John chuckled softly and murmured low,"Punker. Hey…come on, man…nothin wrong with askin for a little…ya know…affection,man! Shit…just because we're friends don't mean we can't have sex. I mean…damn…I haven't either since Wade left me. Soo…I see nothin wrong with…ya know…havin a good night out together,man It don't have to mean nothin outside of bein friends if we're not…ready for that. Geez,Punker…ya don't need to be so shy or scared around me,ha…"
Punk put his head down and was startled as he saw John's hand lay itself on his thigh. Punk's breath quickened as he heard John murmur huskily,"Hm…have to warn ya though,Punker. Maybe ya know this by now…but I tend to be a tease soo…just gonna have to live with that. Besides…I kinda wanna hear ya,baby…" Punk quaked as John's hand crept closer to his aching hard-on and he could no longer hold it in,moaning out low at John's somewhat endearment,finally getting his wish of being touched intimately fulfilled,"Ohh…John…please…you…fucking…tease…ohh…" He heard John murmur out again,"huh,ya know…I like that,Punker. Hold that thought though…I got this,baby…" Punk was confused as John turned into a Chili's restaurant,but parked in a dark parking area.
Punk couldn't process any more though as John made quick work of his jeans button and tenderly withdrew his aching cock. Punk cried out at the sensation,instinctively bucking up into John's hand,"OHH! John! John! Please…ohh…please…touch me…please…fuck…" John murmured low in hunger,"Damn,Punker…ya really did need me,huh? Don't worry…I got ya…Imma make ya cum,Punker…ya want that,baby? Hm?" Punk threw his head back against the seat and whimpered out in urgency at John's words,growing more harder,"Y…yes,John…ohh…please…make me fucking cum…god…please…I…need you…John,please…" John murmured huskily,licking along Punk's earlobe,"God…ya…I will,Punker…I'm here…come on,baby…moan for me…let it out,man…"
Punk moaned out louder as John's hand started stroking his length fast and hard,"John! John! Oh,god! Oh,god! Feels…so…good…fuck…yes…more…please!" Punk quaked hard as he felt his orgasm approaching,knowing John's talented hand was making quick work of him. Plus the added fact that he was already so aroused probably helped as he bucked up into John's hand faster,wishing John really was fucking him. In a moment of crazed ecstasy,Punk never realized he actually did scream out loudly in urgency for John as he was bucking up faster into his hand,"John! John! Ohh! Ohh! Please, I…want you…inside me…so fucking bad…please…I…want you…so bad…please…ohh! Ohh! John…fuck me hard…now...please! Ohh,god! John…John…JOHN!" Not realizing what he confessed as he orgasmed hard, he simply laid his head back against the seat.
He shivered as he felt John tenderly tuck his spent cock back into his jeans and felt his breath on his ear,"Hm…wow,Punker…you're a loud one. I wonder if you meant that. Cause if ya did,man…I'd be happy to oblige later,Punker! Want ya too…so bad now…but…ya…we'll worry bout me later. Come on,Punker…let's get you fed now that you're all nice and satisfied…hm?" Punk blinked his eyes open,shock flooding his system as his brain processed that he had just received the best ever hand job from none other than John Cena himself,who he had also deemed his somewhat new best friend.
Still stunned, Punk did the only thing he could and it was purely by instinct,turning to give John a shy kiss on the cheek in thanks before scrambling out of the car. Cursing at himself under his breath, he banged his head on the window frame of the car over and over,"you idiot fool! What the fuck is wrong with you? One simple sexual favor from your new best friend and all of a sudden you melt like a pathetic teenybopper lil girl! Get a hold of yourself,Punk! It meant nothing!"
Still banging his head hard,he nearly screamed out loud as he felt a pair of warm arms drape themselves almost lazily around his shoulders along with the low murmur of John's voice in his ear,"Punker…the hell ya doin to yourself? S'ok,man…it was just a kiss…nothin to kill yourself over! Heh…I'd call it a thank you kiss,buuut…it really wasn't,Punker…ya know?" He shook slightly in mixed emotion as John gently turned him around and tipped his head up. Punk only had two seconds to glance up at blue eyes smoldering with what he swore was pure desire before John claimed his lips in the most deepest, hardest kiss he had ever received in his life. Punk's brain seemed to freeze again then catch on fire as he felt John press his body closer into his,John's own arousal was evident. Punk wanted to cry out again,but his mouth was sealed against John's and their tongues were currently in a battle for dominance with Punk only able to whimper for John low in his throat.
Without warning, however, John suddenly pulled away from the kiss and nearly made Punk collapse with how weak he had gotten. Punk quietly gasped for breath as John rested his forehead against his and breathed out huskily,"now THAT…is a thank you kiss,Punker! Heh…just...remember that,baby…k? Heh…might turn things in your favor next time if you know what I mean,man." Punk blinked,brain still trying to process whether or not John just gave him a hint as to what kind of kiss turned him on and how he could use that to his advantage later.
Still confused over John's actions though, Punk looked up at him and murmured low,"O…oh…I see,John. I um…was not aware of that. I've…never…well…I mean…I am still not used to being…kissed like that nor…kissing someone…like that…" John's eyes softened just a bit and Punk shivered as John gently traced his cheek with his fingers,"Punker…I know,man. it's been awhile for us both. Um…hey,ya know…if ya want…I can try that again,just…not so damn forceful…ya know? I just…damn,man…sor…" Punk knew an apology was about to come forth and for some reason this irked him to no end,because he knew his best friend had nothing to apologize for.
Punk breathed out and leaned up to take charge,brushing his lips up softly against John's in a tender,slow kiss to silence him while throwing his arms around John's neck. Punk knew he was pushing it as he heard John's low moan as John's hands traveled to his hips to pull him into his groin to grind Punk hard against him while deepening the kiss. Punk whimpered low in his throat for John again and resisted the urge to buck up into John,wanting so bad for John to take him right now. John finally pulled back slightly enough to gasp out sharply,"godDAMN,Punker! Now THAT'S a kiss,baby…wow! Hell,man…wanna just bend ya over this damn car right now…ha…see what ya started? Heh…" Punk swallowed hard and barely managed to choke out,"J…John…please…I would…gladly do…that. However…I do NOT do public performances! I…I…just…wanted…another kiss...oh,John…it's all my fault it got out of control like this! I'm just…going to walk back to the hotel,this will not work. I am not worth all this,goodbye…my John…"
Before John could react and catch him, not realizing that all of his stuff was still in John's car,Punk turned to start running as fast as he could away from John as the tears once again poured down his face.
Punk stopped to breathe heavily once he knew he had put a good mile between him and John, knowing he had yet to see any car headlights coming from where he had ran from. Punk shivered and gathered his hoodie closer around him, cursing the weather as he felt the wind pick up,"fucking hell! Figures I would get caught in the goddamn rain,of course…think,CM Punk…this is your life! It's one big middle finger pointed directly at YOU!" Punk looked around for somewhere to get out of the impending rainstorm but only saw trees and knew you should never take cover under trees in a storm. Punk put a hand to his head, aware he was getting dizzy as he had yet to eat or drink anything today and knew running that mile probably did not help. Punk whimpered out in distress and panic,"godfuckingdamnit…I've got to find somewhere to hide from this storm or run farther before John finds me…even if I have to fucking pass out there…" Punk wiped the tears of distress off his face,not knowing exactly WHY he ran away from John as he just felt he pushed his limits too much with him and did not deserve him as a friend of any kind. Punk sniffled and coughed out,"better I be alone than cause…others…emotional suffering. I shall suffer on my own! Well,I better keep going…it's starting to fucking rain…"
Punk started running as fast as he could again,a song starting to play in his head as the cold rain started pouring onto him as he got dizzier and dizzier,still crying hard,
What I have in me,
in my mind is you
(I would die if we were through)
What I'm feeling now,
what I'm heading into
(I am lost in pain without you)
(So cold, so alone)
All I have is you
It is all that I'm breathing for
All I need is you
(Now I can't make it through)
All the nights I've prayed,
must this all be untrue?
(I am unprepared to be strong)
I just can't believe
I am losing you
(Unprepared to carry on)
(I can't see you walk away)
(So cold, so alone)
All I have is you
It is all that I'm breathing for
All I need is you
(Now I can't make it through)
I am losing you forever
(I am lost in pain without you)
I am leaving ground forever (Forever, forever)
(Distant, so far, destiny is selecting me)
(I can't be strong, life is disconnecting me)
(Now)
(Loneliness infecting me)
(Gone are the days you were there protecting me)
(So cold, so alone)
All I have is you
It is all that I'm breathing for
All I need is you
(Now I can't make it through)
I am losing you forever
(I am lost in pain without you)
I am leaving ground forever (Forever)
All I have is you
(It is all that I'm breathing for)
All I need is you
(Now I can't make it through)
It is all that I'm breathing for
(breathing for, breathing for),
(breathing for, breathing for, breathing for)
Punk thought he saw the town lights reappear,but his vision was so blurry and distorted that he did not know what he was seeing. He freaked as he saw headlights approach him from behind though and swerved in his running to try to avoid being caught in them,afraid that it was John Cena. He was so weak,dizzy and chilled that he could not handle the spin that he did to avoid the headlights,immediately collapsing face-first to the cold wet ground in a heap. The last thing he saw in his mind's eye before he went unconscious was John Cena's brilliant blue eyes smoldering with desire before he kissed him.