This is a one-shot I started writing in the beginning of 2013 for fun. I kind of forgot about it, though, and never completed it. Well, not before now anyway! It's meant to be a little humorous, so please don't take it too seriously. Other than that, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters Sakura, Naruto or Sasuke.

A Sleeping Problem

The man looked at both of them with wondering eyes. They sat in each their chair on the other side of his desk. The pink-haired lady sat with her legs crossed, her arms crossed in front of her chest, and her face the complete different direction from her side mate. He, however, was slightly slouching, his eyes were derived from lack of sleep, and he was yawning every now and then.

"So, Mrs Uzumaki, you are saying you," he pointed at her, "are having a problem sleeping at night?" She nodded. "While he," he pointed at the blond beside her, "is the cause of it?" She nodded again. The man rubbed his forehead in wonder. The pair had suddenly burst into his office, demanding to help them with a sleeping problem. That meant, the lady was the one demanding. At first he was sure that the man she was dragging with him was the one with the problem, but apparently the case wasn't quite so.

"As soon as I heard about your couple counselling, I had to come here as quickly as possible! I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but frankly it's driving me mad," the lady told him. The man took a quick glance at the blond next to her. It was a pretty strange situation. He had never thought he would have the Hokage and his wife at his office for couple counselling.

"Please, madam, tell me more," he said, and directed all his attention on her. She uncrossed her legs, and brushed over her skirt, her hands finally resting on her thighs.

"You must understand, sir. I was never told married life would be easy," she took a glance at the man beside her, "however, I never thought I would find habits that," she took a deep breath in, "irritating." The man was all ears. "I'll start with the first night this problem started."

Sakura had just finished showering and jumped into her pyjamas. She and Naruto had arrived in Konoha the day before, after a two weeks honeymoon. So far things had been great. It was romantic, their trip had been special and memorable, and Naruto was an amazing guy. Surprisingly she had found few flaws. He had even eaten other food than ramen, which really was a surprise to Sakura. This night, however, would be the start of experiencing a very irritating flaw about him.

Naruto had already gone to bed when she snuggled under the sheet. His back was against her.

"Naruto?" she whispered. He hummed.

"Thank you for two amazing weeks," she said. Naruto turned around and stroke her cheek.

"No, thank you. You're amazing." That made Sakura smile and she cuddled close up to him. His arms held around her. To Sakura, this was perfect. It was all she could wish for, and even more. They fell asleep like that.

Throughout the night, though, they had let go of each other, and lay on each their side of the bed. The small frame of Sakura shivered. Somehow, Naruto had snatched the whole sheet. Of course, freezing like mad, Sakura had woken up, and now she was carefully trying to wake Naruto too.

"Psst, Naruto," she poked his shoulder, "Naruto." There were no signs of him waking up. She started slightly pulling the sheet towards her. Suddenly Naruto gripped it, stopping Sakura from pulling it any further.

"Naruto?" she asked in surprise. It seemed like he was still asleep, but he was evidently very protective of the sheet. Sakura tried to pry his hands off it, but to no use. With a sigh, she let go, and laid her head down on her pillow. For her, this was probably going to be a long night.

Although the cold was making it hard for Sakura, she managed to almost drift into sleep again. Her husband refrained her from that glory too.

"RASEN—" he suddenly shouted. Sakura burst up from her lying position, and glared daggers into his skull.

"Naruto," she threatened. It is said that he who sleeps does not sin. That didn't seem to be the case at all. He bolted up from his earlier peaceful—but annoying—sleeping position, and stood upright beside the bed.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" he shouted, and three shadow clones of himself stood next to him. Sakura nervously backed against the head of the bed.

"N-Naruto, what are you doing?" she asked. He didn't answer. Instead, he and his three clones started performing a jutsu. Sakura's eyes widened.

"Fuuton."

"Naruto!" she shrieked.

"Rasen!"

"Stop it now!" she demanded.

"Shuri—" As he was about to complete the jutsu, he fell on the floor with a snore. All three shadow clones disappeared. Sakura body shook, and she breathed loudly in panic of what had just happened.

"He could've…he could've…" She glared at Naruto.

"NARUTOOOOOOOOO!"

The counsellor shook his head in disbelief. Was this really the man that had taken on the task of protecting the whole village?

"Anyway, that was only the first night." Her hands formed into fists. "His annoying sleeping problem continued."

Sakura and Naruto were in the bathroom brushing their teeth. The atmosphere had gotten pretty bad after last night.

"I didn't lie, Naruto," Sakura said, "You really did try to kill me!"

"Why would I want to kill you?" Naruto asked, making a point by just saying that.

Sakura lifted her hands in the air, which made the toothpaste on her toothbrush splatter everywhere, including on Naurto's face. "I don't know!" Naruto wiped the toothpaste off his cheek.

"I love you, and it's me. Why would I want to kill you?" he asked again.

"Don't repeat yourself! I'm not a psycho. I know what I saw, I know what happened while you were asleep and I was forced to stay awake!" She pointed her toothbrush at Naruto. "You almost exploded the whole room—no, the whole house—with Fuuton Rasen Shuriken!"

"Why would I take such a huge risk? Fuuton Rasen Shuriken would have an awfully damageable effect on me too!"

"I know, Naruto, I'm a doctor," Sakura said in a matter of fact voice. She put down her toothbrush in the glass, wiped her mouth, and turned to leave the bathroom.

"But you," she pointed at him, "tried to kill me." Naruto sighed as she closed the door. With a sigh of her own, Sakura lied down under the sheet, and prayed for a quiet night. She didn't turn around to cuddle with Naruto when he lay down next to her. Right before she fell asleep, she could hear Naruto saying, "If I really did do something last night, I apologize." With a smile, Sakura fell asleep to what would seem like a peaceful night.

Two hours later, and she was proved wrong. Even though he neither kept the sheet for himself nor tried to kill them both, his sleeping form had found a new way to make Sakura getting any sleep seem like an S-class mission. Every few minutes, when Sakura was just about to drift into sleep, something hard and painful met her back.

"Naruto, will you stop—" She couldn't complete her sentence, or turn around to yell at him for that matter, because she was yet again kicked by him in the middle of her back.

"Naruto!" she growled. She was kicked a little further away from him and dangerously close to the edge of the bed.

"I took the bed first, Sasuke," he mumbled in his sleep, "You sleep on the floor." So apparently she was Sasuke now, and on a mission. It was often that the two boys—now men—had had to share a room when they had been on missions. Sakura had the advantage of being the only girl, and therefore always got her own room. Suddenly another kick hit her back, and she desperately clutched to the mattress. As she was about to roll closer to the middle of the mattress, she was kicked again. This time Naruto mumbled, "Get off the bed, teme…"

"Ah!" she screamed, and fell down the bed. With a furious glimmer in her eyes, she crackled her knuckles.

"SHANNARO!"

The counsellor had to agree with her on this one too. To confuse her with his former teammate was maybe not the biggest "I love you" he had ever heard—more like the biggest slap in the face.

"Seriously, how could you?"

"I don't understand why you make such a big deal out of it. I was dreaming."

"You called me Sasuke!"

"I'm sorry! But it wasn't like I was proclaiming my love for him! If was kicking him out of my bed. Shouldn't you be happy for that?" The Hokage crossed his arms.

"I'm not happy that you thought I was Sasuke!" the lady huffed.

The Hokage threw his arms in the air. "Can you let it go?"

The counsellor coughed. "I understand there was more?"

They were both lying in the bed, staring at the white roof.

"Sakura…" Naruto said, trying to get the attention of the lady beside him. She didn't answer, though, as he had expected, but silently demonstrated how mad she was at him.

"Sakura, please don't be angry," he said, "I didn't mean to kick you." Sakura turned so that her back was against him. Her gaze was directed at the orange wall. That stupid orange wall. Why she had agreed to paint it in that awful colour was beyond her. At least she liked to think that. Deep inside she knew it was because Naruto had gotten so excited when he saw the colour. She knew he would give her a warm hug if she said yes, and that he would be extremely happy. That stupid orange wall that she loved. She sighed. What was the point of staying mad? She always forgave him anyway. Sakura turned around to look at Naruto.

"Naruto, I'm sorry for…" She stopped mid-sentence when she saw her husband sprawling across his side of the bed. His right arm lay over his head, while his left rested on his stomach. One of his legs was on the outside of the sheet, making the sheet only covering half of his body. Also, he snored—loudly.

"Don't fall asleep when I have something important to say!" she huffed. That guy. She lay down in her earlier position, and rested her eyes on the orange wall again. Suddenly one arm fell over her and slung around her abdomen, while the other hand brushed her hair and caressed her cheek. Naruto then kissed her behind her ear.

"Naruto…?" Sakura wasn't sure if he was sleepcuddling, or if he really had woken up. He didn't answer, which she took as a sign he was still sleeping.

"Sakura, I love," he cuddled closer to her, which made her blush, "ramen." Immediately she pried his hands off, and slapped the back of his head. However, he still slept.

"Idiot!" Offended, she pulled the sheet off herself, and was about to climb off the bed. A strong hand grabbed her wrist, and hindered her in doing so. With a swift motion he dragged her closer to him, which made her body fall into the corner of his arm. He embraced her, and held her in place. She tried to wriggle out of his strong hold, but he only held her closer and firmer.

"Sakura…" he mumbled. His breath warmed Sakura's ear, and made her head feel tingly. He kissed the gape of her neck.

"Naruto-idiot, how can you be like this when you're asleep?" she mumbled, and turned her back against him, trying to drag herself out of his grip. That only made it easier for him to hold her closer, and snuggle his nose in the corner of her neck. Her face instantly heated up. A hand slipped under her pyjamas top, and dangerously neared her chest. Sakura's hands grabbed his hand, hindering him in doing anything indecent in his sleep.

"Get your hands off me!" Naruto's hand retreated, but he still held her close to him. Sakura couldn't sleep the whole night because of Naruto.

"I can understand the two first nights, but was this really a problem?" the counsellor asked.

"Of course it was! I couldn't sleep the whole night!"

"And why was that? Your husband held around you, how come that was a problem?"

"Because…his warmth, his kisses," the pink-haired lady held her cheeks in her palms and blushed. "I-I couldn't sleep."

The counsellor inwardly sighed at her behaviour.

"I really have that impact on you?" the Hokage asked surprised.

"S-shut up!" she yelled. The counsellor observed that the blond slightly grinned.

"Anyway," she composed herself, "an unbelievable thing happened the next night."

"Wait," the Hokage said, remembering something, "wasn't that the night when you suddenly kicked me out of the bed." He gasped, realising he remembered correctly. "How can you complain on me when you do the same thing?" he questioned while pointing at her.

Another night had arrived, and the moon shone on the dark canvas of the sky. Sakura and Naruto were already lying in bed, and Sakura was staring at Naruto with loving eyes.

"Naruto, how come you lie so far away? Don't you want to lie closer to me?" She patted the empty space between them. Her eyes were slightly seductive, and if Naruto hadn't been so overworked from all the papers, he would've probably accepted the invitation rather quickly.

"I'm tired, Sakura," he told her. Sakura pouted.

"But we can just cuddle," she said, her tone slightly sulky.

"Honestly, I'm not much of a cuddler, Sakura," he told her, "I need some space." Sakura gaped at him in disbelief. What about last night? He definitely was a cuddler!

"We always cuddled at the honeymoon, not to talk about three nights ago!" And last night, she added in her mind.

"Yeah… Honestly, that's not really me. It was nice and all, but I need some sleep."

With a hard kick from her, he lay on the floor.

"Sakura?"

"Good night!"

The pink-haired lady smacked the back of the blond's head.

"Idiot! I had a good reason for kicking you!"

"Yeah? Well, me too! If you were Sasuke, that was more than a good enough reason to kick you out of the bed!" he stated. The lady breathed out in annoyance.

"I'm not Sasuke!"

"Well, I thought you were!"

"Guys, guys… Please calm down," the man behind the desk told them. "Hokage," he looked at the blond, "and…First Lady?" He looked at the pink-haired woman. Both of their attention was currently set on him.

"I can't really see that there's a problem here," he said, "except for the Rasengan-thing…"

"Fuuton Rasen Shuriken," the blond corrected.

"Yes, that," he coughed, "Except for that, I don't think you have a problem. At least you don't need couple counselling. If the sleeping thing is a big problem, maybe your husband should see a doctor."

"I am a doctor."

"Then is it nothing you can do?"

"How can I cure that he's an idiot?"

"Hey!" The Hokage looked at her hurt.

"I'm not Sasuke!" the lady yelled.

"I know that! I would never marry Sasuke, or go on a honeymoon with him, or hold around him, or kiss him, or sleep with—" The Hokage stopped talking and looked at the man behind the desk, as if he wasn't sure of what was appropriate to say in front of a counsellor.

"Hokage, I know what married people do," he stated.

The Hokage coughed. "Anyway, I would only do those things with you!"

The lady blushed a little. She began pulling at the hem of her skirt, and mumbled incoherently things.

"Naruto…"

"Yes, Sakura?"

"I won't let you sleep tonight."

The end.