A/N: So, I've taken almost an eight year hiatus from this site, but I'm back! It's been a long time since I've posted anything worth reading on this site, but I've been sitting on an idea via the Dragon Age fandom that begs to be written. THAT being said...
Disclaimer: This story will be HEAVY in the sense that I think Hawke has one of the best "untold" stories in the fandom. I still don't know why DA2 got so much heat. It was all about character development IMO, and really all the companions were amazing. She's a great complex character and I hope I do this little family of DA loyalists some justice here. This story will be post DA2 - I will be touching on different perspectives as far as the chantry explosion and Hawke post DAI. The Marian Hawke in this story: is voiced as Sarcastic/Rouge Hawke. Hawke/Fenris, Sided with the mages during the final battle in DA2 (to which sister Bethany survived), allowed Anders to live and made an enemy out of Sebastian Vael due to it.
I'm pretty receptive to feedback, so I hope you enjoy!
Summary: Hawke returns to Kirkwall after leading the Grey Wardens to Weisshaupt. With everything that's happened since the chantry explosion, not everyone is happy to see her return.
"Everyone has a story they tell themselves to justify bad decisions... and it never matters. In the end, you are always alone in your actions."
It'd been almost six years since Hawke had stepped foot in Kirkwall. There'd been an immeasurable amount of guilt leading up to it, of course. Sure Varric had become Viscount, but that didn't erase the nightmare that'd been plaguing her ever since the Chantry explosion. Had she done the right thing by letting Anders live? Had she been right in siding with the mages to begin with? Perhaps Fenris was right in saying that magic taints everything it touches.
Still, there she stood in the Gallows, reminiscent of the first time she'd made this trek. What's a year in servitude? This coming home was almost bittersweet. They'd surely come a long way since working for Athenril. Sometimes she wasn't so sure she'd left those days completely behind her.
"Girl." The tone was sharp, yet familiar from behind. A voice that belonged to a man Hawke had become very close to since her mother had passed away.
"Uncle Gamlen." Gamlen was greeted by a smile before she had completely looked him over. Age had not been kind to her dear uncle; expectedly so. Still, Hawke had come to terms with the fact that he was all she had now that Bethany had joined a circle in Ferelden amidst the urging of an ally Hawke had come to know during the short time she aided the Inquisition.
The walk through the Gallows had brought back memories that the rogue had thought buried long ago. She almost felt like this was her walk of shame and Gamlen showing her off like the awful prize he'd bestowed on all of Kirkwall. Still, she walked alongside her uncle taking notice of the whispers from onlookers. The city itself had still been undergoing major recovery since the chantry explosion. Surely Varric had been responsible for its transformation. The Templars that had once marched the city no longer stood their posts, and there wasn't a mage in sight. The walk up to Hightown caused a stir deep inside of Marian. She couldn't help but wonder if the streets were still run rampant by thugs at night, or if…
Stopped in her tracks she stood face to face with Fenris' mansion. Gamlen, a few steps ahead of her turned back. One look to the rundown mansion, then back to her, he scoffed. "Nasty old place. Surprised it hasn't completely fallen to the ground." It wasn't the structure of the building that had given Marian chills, but rather what was inside. "Come on girl. I've got some friends coming over to the Estate for Wicked Grace soon. Don't want to be late."
Haunted by her own memories, Hawke nodded without a word. "You go on ahead uncle. I remember where my estate is." Walking up to the door of Fenris' mansion, her hand reaches out coyly towards the doorknob before she pulls back and notices Gamlen hasn't left his position.
"Nobody's seen him since the Chantry explosion." The tone in his voice was cold, but Hawke understood in Gamlen's own way, it was as compassionate as he'd ever get towards her.
"I…how did…" Clearing her throat, she sighed and turned back in the direction of her estate. It was going to be a long difficult road reclaiming the parts of her she'd lost during her time away from Kirkwall. The city wasn't the only thing that needed rebuilt.