Anakin had seen Obi-Wan injured in battle before. Blood seeping from torn open skin, revealing bone and muscle, had start to become a daily occurrence for him. He and Obi-Wan were no strangers to the perils of battle field. Anakin had seen Obi-Wan with his skull split open, his skin ravaged by toxins, his arm and fingers bent at strange angles. Obi-Wan might have been suffering, but Anakin knew how to take it away. Bacta, bandages, and a few gentle touches could ease the pain.
When he saw Obi-Wan on his return from Zigoola, Anakin was at a loss. The physical injuries, even the gaping lightsaber wound in his thigh, were all taken care of by the Healers. It was his lover's mental state that worried him. He wasn't eating or sleeping. Obi-Wan kicked Anakin out of his bedroom at night, something that Anakin resented deeply, considering that Obi-Wan's nights were spent waking up, always screaming the same mantra DIE JEDI DIE. Any attempts Anakin made to talk to him, even after waking him from his nightmares only earned him brief, dismissive responses.
After one particularly brutal nightmare, Anakin changed his tactics. He had tried to give Obi-Wan his space, respecting his need to work through his problems alone, but it was becoming more and more apparent that he was not solving his issues, he was drowning in them.
"Obi-Wan! Wake up! It's just a nightmare!" Obi-Wan sprang up in bed. Hwas drenched in cold sweat, his entire body hunched forward and violently rocking back and forth. Anakin took hold of his shoulders, careful not to make any sudden movements.
"Shhh. It's okay, I'm here. Relax, Obi-Wan. You're safe."
Obi-Wan only moaned in response. Anakin grasped his hands, holding them firmly in his lap, doing his best to keep up the stream of reassurances. Obi-Wan's skin was hot and damp; even in the dim light, the sweat soaking through his sleepwear was obvious.
"You're burning up," Anakin said softly. "Come on, you need a bath."
"Go back to bed. I'm fine."
"No you aren't." Anakin leaned over and gently pressed a kiss to Obi-Wan's forehead. "Give me a minute, I'll be right back."
Unsurprisingly, Obi-Wan didn't respond.
Once the bath was drawn, Anakin slipped back into the bedroom. Obi-Wan was sitting on the edge of the bed, his face buried in his hands. He was muttering to himself, the same mantra over and over. die jedi die jedi die die die die anakin will die you will die jedi die. Anakin slipped next to him, wrapping an arm around his waist.
"Hey." Obi-Wan's ramblings stopped.
"You came back."
Anakin smiled sadly. "Of course I did."
Obi-Wan got of the bed, his legs buckling slightly under his weight. Anakin helped him limp into the bathroom. Knowing Obi-Wan's recently developed aversion for shadows and darkened rooms, Anakin had left the lights on, despite having lit several candles. The tub was filled with to the brim with fragrant bubbles.
"Do you like it?"
Obi-Wan didn't say anything. Sighing, Anakin gently peeled Obi-Wan's clothing away from his emaciated form before discarding of his own. Once they were fully disrobed, Anakin settled them down in the layers of bubbles and bath salts in the tub. Obi-Wan pushed away the arms curled around his waist to move away until he was sitting across from Anakin, their legs resting side by side. Anakin despondently watched him move away, but didn't say anything. At least Obi-Wan seemed to be relaxing, letting the scents and warmth of his surrounding comfort him. The frantic look in his eyes were fading at any rate.
"I'm sorry." He said suddenly.
Anakin looked up at him. "For what?"
"For putting you through this."
Anakin put a hand on his submerged thigh. "I love you. You aren't putting me through anything. I will always help you."
"What if you can't?" Obi-Wan whispered. "I was surrounded by the Dark Side. It became a part of me. It's still in me."
"No, it isn't. It's just your nightmares."
"I can hear it in my head."
"Die, Jedi, die?" Anakin asked quietly. Obi-Wan had been shouting it enough times, Anakin had almost started to repeat it himself.
Obi-Wan lowered his head and blushed. "Yes."
"Stop beating yourself up for it. You'll get better."
Obi-Wan thought of the voice. The constant hatred flowing through his mind, wishing him nothing but death and evil, it wasn't going to suddenly disappear. He didn't know how to get rid of it. Once he left Zigoola, he thought he would be away from the terrors that had plagued him. But he was wrong. It had remained with him. How did he get rid of this? It wasn't something physical that could be healed with bacta and bandages. It was a part of his mind, he couldn't just tear it out.
"What if I don't?"
"Come here."
"Anakin – "
" Come here," Anakin repeated. He held out his arms. Obi-Wan hesitated before moving through the foam to settle in Anakin's lap. Obi-Wan was tense, sitting straight up and trying to avoid any more contact with Anakin's skin, despite Anakin's arm around his waist.
"You will get better, Obi-Wan. It might take awhile, but you will. And I will be with you the entire time. You just need to take your mind off it."
Pain. Pain took his mind away from it. When his nerves and body were screaming with exhaustion and agony, he had a few moments of reprieve. He had stared at his lightsaber several times, wondering if a few minor burns would allow him to sleep at night. Then he felt Anakin's presence in the room next to him, felt the concern and worry that was thrumming through the Force, and thought better of it. He had put Anakin through enough.
"Nothing takes my mind off of it."
Anakin lowered his head and kissed Obi-Wan soundly on the mouth. "Let me try. I'll protect you."
"I am sorry for burdening you with this."
Anakin sighed and ran his fingers lightly down the older man's back.
"I love you. Caring for you isn't a burden. Do you think I would ever leave you? Would you leave me?"
"No, but – "
Anakin pressed a finger to his lips. " – nothing is going to change my mind. I love you, Master. I'm always going to be here."
Obi-Wan finally seemed to accept his argument and let his guard down, slumping against Anakin's bare chest, relishing in the skin against skin contact. Anakin idly brushed a few bubbles out of Obi-Wan's hair. His lover hummed in contentment. The pair stayed like that for over an hour, Anakin tracing random patterns over Obi-Wan's chest and arms. Obi-Wan did nothing. He gave himself over to Anakin and for the first time in weeks, the only noise in Obi-Wan's head was the steady sound of Anakin's heartbeat.