Richard Clarkson prided himself on being clear headed. Always. Managing trauma in a hospital, managing trauma in a human body, shooting a gun in the war when he had no alternative...there was no such thing as a ruffled Richard Clarkson.

Except, that is, when Isobel Crawley was involved. She always seemed to find a way of short circuiting his mind, confound her!

They had been courting for a few weeks and the previous night was the best of his life. He got to make love to the woman he has been in love with for months. It was slow, tender and all about getting to know each other's intimate nuances. He noticed everything about her...her soft chestnut mane filling his nose with a lavender scent, her velvety skin and those adorable freckles on her upper back and those hands setting him on fire and those sizable brown puddles of emotion which cold look down to the bottom of his soul.

And then...nothing.

If anything, she seemed angry at him. Since he very reluctantly left her sleeping in her bed and slipped on his uniform, sneaking past Moseley to start his shift, Isobel had not spoken to him or even looked at him. She had come in a couple of hours later wearing that plain blue dress which, though practical, enhanced her tall and slender figure. A figure he had the privilege to see and touch and love - and was now addicted to. He was on the other side of the ward and smiled up at her but she simply looked the other way. There was no let up as soldier after soldier needed his attention. She avoided him and when she had to ask for instructions, she looked at her feet and her voice was flat.

But why would she be angry? She knew how the shifts were - hell she insisted on putting Lady Cora's nose out of joint about them. They both knew they needed all the sleep they could get and it was only reasonable that he let her have a couple of hours she thought better of him? Had he hurt her while making love? Christ, he hoped not! He could bear almost anything but hurting Isobel would be too much for him. All these thoughts were dicing around in his head as he treated patient after patient, never really letting Isobel out of his sight. He had to speak to her, if this was going to end as quickly as it started, he was determined to hear the reason coming from her own lips. As it was, he had to wait until dinner at the Abbey that day.


He was in full uniform chatting to lord Grantham. He did feel a bit stuffy during these events but he was a bit sorry for the chap, he clearly wanted to see some action again but the army would never let him. Add to that, Lady Cora would have the head of any general who signed off on it - grating with Isobel about the custody of the abbey must be truly upsetting for someone who was used to getting her way.

And then she came in, she could always preen herself into a beauty and she looked like a royal in that gold and red dress with her hair pinned up. He wanted to go to her and hold her and run his fingers through those soft tresses. Look into her gorgeous eyes, ask her what he's done wrong and beg for forgiveness. But faith was not on his side and Carson stiffly announced that dinner was ready whereupon he had to sit next to an increasingly suspicious Violet Crawley who was grilling him like a fish on a stick. When it was time to turn in, he made a bee line to her and made her excuse herself from the conversation she was in with the general and Cora as they vied for his praise - Richard couldn't really give a toss. He led her away by the arm to her room and locked the door.

"What in God's name do you think you're doing? How dare you-"

Richard put his finger to her lips and stepped close to her "Now listen to me. I don't give a damn about your pissing contest with Lady Cora. We started something, yesterday, you and I. It actually started the day we met but if you want to end it, you come to me. You look me in the eye and you tell me yourself - and why. You do not avoid me and act as if nothing happened."

She pushed him but he wrapped an arm around her waist when he saw tears streaming down her cheeks.

"YOU ended it. You're such a cruel bastard...did you think I was some doxy you can play with when you want to and put away?"

His hold on her remained but his face softened "Isobel, what are you talking about. Did I hurt you? Did you think I'd love you for one night and let you go after you became my best friend...I've waited for so long."

Her hand was on on his cheek, caressing his face "You did not hurt me, you could never...but after what has been the most intense lovemaking of my life, you roll over and fall asleep and sneak out without so much as a note or a 'good morning' - how was I supposed to react? I had been feeling this thing between us...suddenly I felt like a two penny whore..."

And suddenly his embrace was gone, Richard barely had the strength to hold himself upright let alone her. He had hurt her after all, not physically but emotionally. His encounters were usually with lady friends of his in London and it was all about scratching a natural itch. He had not contacted them since he met Isobel but he never thought he would ever treat her as he did them. He made her feel abandoned...and himself like a lowlife.

"I'm sorry Isobel. I am so so sorry...I have not been in a relationship for decades - I was simply exhausted and in no way did I ever mean to make you feel that way. I rushed because I was late for my shift and there was no let up at the hospital so I never explained myself...I love you, Bel." Before he knew it, she was the one holding him.

"I love you too, my soldier doctor." she whispered before her lips touched his. she clung to his lapels on his uniform before laying her finger on the medals and buttons on his chest. His cheeks wiped the tears from hers and he could never have believed in the ability to love another human being so completely as he did now.

It turns out there is such a thing as a ruffled Richard Clarkson, when he fell in love.


AN: So...there you have it folks. Shout out to ericajaneberry for the prompt and DR who looks so darn perfect in a military uniform. Let me know what you think if you have the time :)