Authors Notes: Welcome to a fic created by the good lord only knows what. We're really not sure, and no this is not serious. For petes sakes people just love the boom. (At least that's what Ekaterinn would tell you. I'd tell you that as the Prince of the world, I Utena Tenjou will MAKE you have fun. . . or not) We don't own Bishoujou Senshi Sailor Moon, but damn do we wish we did. WE do own SAN, but none of you would know what that is YET. I might add we get Mamo-Chan, or Endy as the case may be on alternative Sundays when Usagi has her rendezvous with Keisuke. (I promise I'll put that up later, it's funny. . . Want to go look at the MOON????) Till then beloved reader, we leave you with:
A Cunning Plan
It seemed like a good idea at the time . . .
A parody by Lady Ekaterinn Duval and Lady Bejiin Ripley (They're both crazy)
Once upon a time, in a far off kingdom, there was a ravishing girl named Serenity. I should know, I'm the baka who fell in love with her. You see, my affliction, similar to love, and in a way closer to hate is beginning to drive me crazy; and we all know that that is not good. Especially since, when I feel crazy, I have this peculiar habit of throwing steel tipped roses at various unsuspecting targets. I might mention that it's hard enough to find good help as it is!
Being the dashing, and handsome I might add, prince of the Earth, you'd think that an angel like Serenity would grovel at my feet. There are quite a few girls who'd love to be that close. (A.N. yeah. . . I wanna grovel at your feet. PLEASE ENYDMION SAMA???) However, Serenity always manages to bring out the worst in my temper; hence my cunning plan: if I had one!
Think man think! The most beautiful and ravagable girl is waiting for you on the moon, and we all know that her dress is a bit too confining, not to mention see through. I could just show up in her chambers. I'm sure she'd never expect that of the prince of the earth, even if they do say I'm a playboy, but, that just wouldn't be right. She is going to want me in more than her chambers by the time I'm done with her or my name isn't Endymion! And it IS!
So now all I need is a cunning plan, and of course to put on something more comfortable. I believe I still have the silk number that I wore to that masquerade on Venus. Serenity was there as well I might add, and I've never seen a more enticing devil. I would've gladly followed her back to hell. . .
Stepping out of my closet I smoothed the black silk shirt and straightened out the pants. Grinning at my reflection I nodded, we were ready for action, if we could just come up with a cunning plan. Of course, my reflection really wasn't going to be much help in adding to the plan, but I grinned like a fool anyway. Now doesn't every girl like roses? How many roses would it take to get under her skirts anyways? Well I have no problem with roses, considering how many things I've destroyed lately with them. . . now getting to Serenity's skirts is the problem. Serenity's all too transparent skirts, but I digress.
Should I just teleport to her? 'Hi honey, I'm here to get laid!' No, that seems a little beneath even me. But I STILL NEED a cunning plan. What's the use of being the CROWN PRINCE of EARTH if you can't come up with a simple cunning plan. I have generals for this sort of thing! . . . Wait, I DO have generals for this sort of thing. Well at least my generals could probably distract the senshi, which would just leave me to deal with Luna and seduce Serenity, and I can handle a cat any day of the week.
So what's a handsome prince to do? Call a meeting of the royal guard, OF COURSE! After I'd explained my cunning plan (or lack thereof) to the four 'gentlemen' I gleaned that they would be happy to oblige. I smiled as my generals headed for the moon each already having a senshi in mind, no doubt.
To teleport, or not to teleport. That is the question. Whether tis nobler to seduce yon fair maiden with cunning repartee or just use the love potion that I came into possession of at afore mentioned ball on Venus. One way or another, tonight was going to be memorable. Hence selfsaid 'Prince of Earth' began chanting a familiar teleportation spell.
I opened my eyes to find myself in the royal gardens. In retrospect, I should have teleported to her chambers directly, but how was I to know that my aforementioned generals and the theoretical guardians would already be 'enjoying' the gardens together. Eye opening would be the only word for what I witnessed before I teleported again, this time directly to Serenity's chambers. As luck would have it, Serenity was in her chambers (Lucky me!) wearing those transparent skirts, as always. She was staring out her window at the sky. (A.N. She was staring at the Earth. If only poor Endy knew what I know. . . lol) My cunning plan, if I ever really had one, was certainly miles away from this blessed room. Opening my mouth to use some of that cunning repartee I had so prided myself in back on Earth I was surprised to hear only a squeak. Plan A failing, I decided love potion it would be. Slipping over to a table I smiled as I saw the princesses evening tea still untouched. Pouring the contents of the vial into a cup I hid behind a column and waited.
I have never liked cats, and tonight would make for no exception. Do YOU know who drinks the princesses evening tea? Well I will gladly tell you that Luna, the royal advisor, and an all around pain, drank Serenity's tea this evening and started talking about a certain other damned advisor named Artemis. SO much for Plan B. At least I got Luna out of the way. Onto Plan C. Oh wait, there is no Plan C. Be daring, improvise! Yeah that sounded good. Watching Luna stagger out of Serenity's quarters I decided that using the potion on Serenity wouldn't have been so much fun after all. I stepped out from behind the column and made my way towards the still distracted Serenity. Slowly I neared those tempting skirts. Step by step I imagined just what her lips would feel like and then I tripped on a stuffed rabbit. Serenity would have stuffed bunnies lying around her room wouldn't she?
A very startled princess turned around and smiled at me. Damn her! She SMILED. Then she started laughing. SO much for wit, the dashing prince of earth would not make an appearance tonight. Trying to regain some of my charm, or not to look like a complete fool, I stood and bowed. "You look lovely tonight princess." I said as I rose and I waited for it. She was going to make some comment which would destroy all hopes of ever getting under those skirts. Three . . . Two . . . One . . ."Endymion?!? Are you really here?" she asked softly. Wait, that wasn't an insult, or WAS IT? "No, I'm the ghost of Endymion. He died a lovesick fool on the Earth." Serenity's face grew saddened. "Oh, my precious Endymion. I'm so sorry! I didn't mean for that to happen!" She said as tears began to stream down her face.
I have always been a sucker for tears, especially her tears, and now I felt very guilty. That hadn't been an insult. Giving a deep sigh I said "I'm still alive Serenity. No worries see?" I said as I took her hand and placed it on my cheek. She smiled up at me and blushed. Perhaps no cunning plan would be needed this evening after all. As silence grasped the room I realized something. Cunning repartee hadn't worked. Potent love potions from Venus had worked, but not in the proper way, and that left me with one last thing to do. I kissed her. And oh what a kiss that was. But then again, I won't torture YOU with the details ^_~
The End
Or IS IT?
It COULD just be the BEGINNING
Or we could just be acting really obnoxious right now
BUT, there still are two weeks before we have to go back to college, which means
There COULD be more, and no that's not your decision ^_~