A/N: This is a one-shot that does not have anything to do with any of the stories I have written. This may sound tacky and for that I'm sorry. I listened to the Score soundtrack of Titanic and the music sort of clicked something. I just felt inspired by it. Hopefully I interpreted the music correctly. The romantic part of it anyway. I don't own anything just in case anyone asks.
Summer
It was the last month of summer in San Francisco and the weather was as hot as it could get. I could have gone home but my folks were on a private getaway in Paris and I sure as hell didn't want to spend two weeks of summer in the company of a brother that doesn't know when his pranks are just too much. So I decided to stay in campus. I was empty aside from those cadets that want to make work up and some instructors. One of them being Commander Spock.
I was on the beach walking. The sand felt warm under my feet, the ocean water was fairly warm and the sun warmly caressed my exposed skin. I was walking as slow or maybe slower than as snail and was enjoying the moment. I didn't expect my mind to wonder to him (Spock) at a moment like this and thought that maybe the thought of him would just run away from my mind as fast as it came in, but it didn't. I kept walking and saw the one person I knew could either take or break my heart in front of me. He was lying down on a towel reading a book(a particularly old one at that) and what made the scene worse was the fact that he was wearing nothing but black swimming trunks. This made my imagination run a lot faster than it should have run.
Perfect, I thought. He was…perfect. I quickly drew my eyes away from his handsome form before the thought of jumping him came to mind. Alas it was to late he had seen me.
Crap.
"Cadet Uhura," he said standing up. Oh gods he is…beautiful.
"Commander," I nodded back tried not to stare at his bare chest. Which was well sculpted, lean but not overly muscular and had the slightest hint of an olive green hue to it.
His face was emotionless but his eyes had a brightness to them that only seemed to happen whenever I either came into a room or when I academically accomplished something that pleased him. He walked towards me and my mind went blank. I did not know what to say and for a moment I thought I had stopped breathing.
"I did not know anyone would be at the beach at this time of day," he said breaking the silence that had fallen over us.
It was a Friday, he must have forgotten. The beach was empty other than a very few people walking along the shore, who were mostly couples.
"I thought you would have come here on a weekend late at night with other cadets. I suppose my assumption was wrong." He said looking at me his eyes still twinkling.
He hadn't forgotten that today was Friday, as always he knew and as always thought that I would come here at night with Gaila. Which in itself is not a bad idea unless you want to get laid and the next thing you know wake up in some strange town half dressed. To me that is just way wrong but to Gaila it seems to be the way her life is.
"I don't like to part all-night as others seem to," I said. He raised an eyebrow.
"May I ask why?" he asked almost unsure.
"Its alright you're not the first one to ask. Because I don't want to go to the party at night and then wake up in a strange town only half dressed. Plus I don't want to imagine the other worst case scenario." I said. I looked at him and I felt my heart lift, my stomach seemed to be filled with butterflies and my spirit seemed to be at peace for what seemed to be the first time. But my mind was making fun of that fact, mocking me every time I felt what the way I felt when I was with Spock.
'He will never feel the same way about you. You are nothing but his student. You are nothing to him…' my mind would tell me. And I couldn't blame it either because I knew it was right. What the hell am I to him?
"Is there something wrong Cadet?" he asked breaking my train of thought.
"No, nothing. My mind must've wondered of." I said quickly. I didn't want him to see the love my heart held for him.
His eyes held concern.
I was curious to find out how he would react if he really found out that I was in love with him. As always my mind told me not to, but I had to put my heart on the line and know the truth.
"Commander, may I ask a question?" I asked. There is no turning back from here, I thought.
"Of course, what topic?" He asked now interested. He may not be interested in the topic for long, my mind said to me. But I could not think like that until I had the answer I wanted.
"I'm a writer, I sometimes write one of my characters based on real life moments or circumstances." I said feeling much like Belle from Beauty and the Beast. But, I have always felt like her.
"And this question is one for one of your characters based on me?" he asked now curious and his eyes I think got a little brighter. I think.
That idea was a great one but I know he wouldn't appreciate it if I did that without his permission and most importantly he had to go over the fictional character and give me a few pointers to refine it a little.
"Actually, no the character is female and she is based on me and her spiraling love life, well actually her life in general." I said as casually as I could.
His eyes lost some of the brightness I had seen earlier.
"But I promise you I will let read it as soon as I finish it." I said to him.
"Oh, so this is a hypothetical question," he said. It was a statement not a question.
"Yes, it is," I said. Yes and no, I thought to myself.
"I shall answer any of your questions if you may answer one of mine first," he said his eyes sparkled again, mischievously? Was he teasing me?
"Sure," I said not sure how to ask my question.
"Why would you ask me instead of someone else?" he said this seriously and I didn't know how to answer it at once.
"Because if I ask someone else they will think that what I'm writing is either a joke or ruse and I don't want that." I said and this part was true. I need an honest answer, or at least something close to an honest answer.
"First I have to know is the plot of your story or book," he said giving me his out most attention.
"Its about a young woman no older than I that is called the beauty of the skies and moon at night since she has blue eyes as the sky and black hair as the night sky. She is intelligent, a talented dancer and singer, a powerful personality and is the greatest friend you could ever have, but she is also stubborn and is someone that doesn't take no nonsense from anyone. She is carefree and charming someone who is not afraid to speak her mind even if the moment for it is not the right one. She is a helper, she is a lover and a fighter and someone that will never back down or easily beaten by a challenge." I said proud of the character I had based on myself.
"Much like yourself," he nodded. I gave him a small smile bracing myself for what may or may not break my heart into a million tiny pieces.
"She is walking through the market of the villager she lives in and sees the man she is completely in love with. For some reason she cannot go up to him and know him on a more personal level." I said knowing that the moment is getting closer.
"And why not?" he asked completely shocked(if that were possible) at my confession.
"For the reason that I have never felt like that over anyone but for one person and there is the possibility he will never feel the same way about me as I do for him," I said hoping he didn't know it was him.
He nodded and waited for my question.
"Hypothetically, would you have loved me?" I asked thinking I had crossed the thin line that was between us.
"If its to personal you don't have to answer," I said thankful that there was almost no one on the beach.
"I will answer your question Cadet," he said, "Yes, I would have. But since this is the real world and not a hypothetical one a relationship between a student and a professor is forbidden as it is stated in the rule book." He said in a monotone.
When he said yes my heart flew but was suddenly shot down as he said quoted a rule from the "Book of Federation Laws"(of the academy of course).
"I hope I have cleared something for you cadet," he said and something that looked like pain crossed his features before it disappeared again.
What did I tell you, he will never look a you as a woman. He will always look at you as nothing but his student. My mind said, well more like yelled with satisfaction. My heart felt like it had just been stabbed with a knife.
I started to walk back to where I left my things without looking back at him or saying goodbye. He would think I am a uneducated young woman, I thought but I didn't care.
As soon as I got my things I ran as fast as I could away from the beach. I will never see this place as sanctuary ever again, I also thought and for once it was the truth, I have always seen the beach as a personal sanctuary for my personal needs.
I heard him call after me but I didn't want to see him anymore than what I already saw him at the academy.
I arrived to my room and to my relief Gaila was not there and hopefully not come back for a while. Hopefully. I took a shower and thought about going out but I just…I didn't feel like going out to the world. I didn't realize how much pain I was feeling until I hit the bed.
"Lights," I called and like that they were off letting me rot in my misery.
I pulled my legs up and held them as tight as I could against my chest hoping I wouldn't break. But it didn't work.
I thought of all the pros and cons of the friendship I had with Spock and thought of how I would have not been the most logical choice for a bride, and at that thought the tears finally fell.
And they never seemed to stop.
(Fall)
I had avoided the Commander for the remainder of the summer but as I went over my new class schedule and found that I had three classes with him. It wasn't the first time I was in one of his classes but now I don't know if I want to be in his class at all. But as Gaila once said, 'You are Nyota freaking Uhura you are a woman of potential and if you can't get pointed ear and logic in bed then you are nothing but a baby!' At that thought I got a grip and stepped into my class.
I made sure to sit in the back corner of the class so he wouldn't be able to see me, I never doubted he couldn't but hey can't blame a girl for trying. As soon as the bell would ring I would be almost the first one to leave even though I would see him looking for me. Some days I would hope that he would forget about me but then as it always does reality strikes and all you can do is hang on until the day would end.
I seem to be doing as great as I did last year, but better. I am answering every question the Commander asks me as long as I lowered my head to my notes after each answer. I didn't want to look into his eyes, I don't know I may find in them.
The pain never seemed to either stop nor shrink, it just seemed to expand and try to break me every time he was asking me to answer a question or every time I walked in to the room before classes. I knew the pain would never really go but sometimes I wish that it would let me work.
I dodged Kirk as hard as I did Spock. But the difference is that Spock tries to start a conversation and Kirk just stays that he wants to nail me. And this is no lie.
(Winter)
"WHAT! You are going to Orion for Christmas!" I said to my green roommate.
"Yes I am. I'm going to go pick my mother and then go to Risa for Christmas. Plus this season may be what you need to focus on your Commander." She added with a grin and wink.
I loved Gaila but sometimes I wish she would not go there. At the mention of Spock I would sometimes go into tears. Since the wound still seemed to be relatively fresh. And almost every time I went into tears it was in front of him. It would be me walking around campus and I would see superior officers(women mostly) flirt with him and I would suddenly go into shock for a short moment. After the shock would wear off I would feel the sting of the tears come and all I could do was take deep breaths to try and calm down while I hoped the tears would not fall. As I would begin to walk the other way he would catch me line of sight and hold my eyes for what seemed like forever, but what scared me the most was what I would see in them. Concern? Care? Love? What, him? Feel love for me? I don't think so and that fact just made me want to cry harder. And as soon as I started to walk again he would try to follow. I would hide in a darkened hall waiting for him to be on his way. And each time I saw him go I would feel the need to crawl into a cave and die.
As the Christmas came closer and closer I decided to keep my word to him and let him read my book.
"Only five days till Christmas," I told myself walking the nearly empty hallways of the academy. Classes had already finished for Christmas break and as soon as break was issued the cadets and professors left the campus. And to be quite honest it looks like a ghost town.
Should I leave him his gift now in his office or not? I asked myself almost as soon as I reached Commander Spock's classroom. I was afraid to give it to him in person even though I had nothing to fear. Maybe it was the fear of getting hurt again? I don't know.
"Hello," I said checking to see if he was there. Thank the gods he wasn't. I stepped in as soon as I made sure no one was in and placed my book (the actual writing was in one of those old fashioned three ring binders) on his chair along with a card, not wanting anyone to see. I used the ancient way to write my book by using paper and pen.
As I walked out of the room and halfway through I heard talking.
"It's Cadet what's her name isn't it?" The woman said.
"To whom are you referring to Lieutenant?" it was Spock I recognized his deep voice anywhere.
"To that Uhura girl. When it comes to her everything you say and do is different. You seem more focused on what she does and says like there is nothing else in the room!" I also recognized the female voice to be Lieutenant Powers. Everyone on campus know that she has a very deep and public crush on Spock but he just didn't (and doesn't) look interested. What had caught my attention was their topic of conversation.
"Cadet Uhura a student," he said in his normally emotionless tone. That didn't come as a shock she is always trying to place me in the arms of a superior officer. Last week it was Pike. Everyone also knows that she is jealous of most of the women on campus. Just for their outer looks, smarts and self-confidence. I tend to be all of those things.
"Yes, she is. She is also one that you treat in a very high regard. Tell me Commander what she really means to you?" as if reading my mind she asked that question. Because what she said was true, he does look and treat me like I'm maybe more than a friend to him.
No he doesn't, my brain rebelled.
I held my breath as both Lt. Powers and I expected the answer.
"She means nothing. She is just a student." He said in that same monotone.
I thought that at least he would protect our friendship but no. He really doesn't care. Everything we do together seemed to be out of duty. My heart seemed to skip beats at the answer.
I walked back to where his office was thinking I would take back my gift for him before he got a chance to read it.
I opened the door quietly not to disturb whoever was there. I took a peek inside and saw him sitting on the desk reading my card.
He looked up and when he saw me the tears seemed to fall on their own. He stood up and walked towards the door, I on the other hand dropped all of my things on the floor and ran.
"Nyota!" he called after me. But I didn't care, nothing mattered anymore. My heart was permanently broken and I don't know how I was going to fix it.
I just kept running not looking back to even see if anyone was following me.
I suddenly knew where I was as I stopped running. I was at the peer another of the places I would go to for peace and quiet. The day was grey and cold, just as I felt at this moment. I pulled my feet close to my chest just as I did during the summer but now it was different. Now the pain seemed to intensify, as time passed and there was no way for me to make it stop or even reduce a little. I didn't know what was running through my mind but whatever it was it told me to jump into the freezing water below.
"Nyota," a voice said. "Nyota, wake up. Wake up." I recognized the voice and at the moment I wished for him to just let me die in the cold. He didn't care right? Then why was he trying to wake up? I could not feel the water around me, I felt his arms tightly wrapped around me.
I didn't realize he had risked his life to save me. Why had he jumped into freezing water to save me? I asked myself.
"Kum'i ashaya," he said to me in a tender voice, "ki'sarlah nash-veh," he continued to say in Vulcan.
"Vu-tor-fam-tun-tor," I told him in Vulcan. I could not see his face but I felt his arms' hold tighten.
"More than you know," he said in standard. "I saw you run and called your name. Why did not you stop?" he asked.
I could answer him, I don't want to. I don't want to tell him I love him. If I do he will probably quote that specific rule.
"Nyota, please answer me," I said taking my chin in his hand.
"I wanted to leave to you privacy," I quickly lied.
"Nyota do not lie to me," he said.
"I am not. I wanted my gift for you to be left a surprise and leave you to open it." I said my voice gaining some strength.
I started to shiver and he started to get up with me in his arms. I thought we were going back to his classroom but he didn't seem to be walking that way.
I must've lost consciousness again because when I woke up I was in a bed and wearing men's black t – shirt. I looked around and noted that this wasn't my dorm either. Where had Spock taken me? I had half a brain to call the authorities but thought better about it. I got up to see where exactly I was. I walked into the living room to find myself face to face with a gorgeous seaside and the sun making the ocean sparkle in a way I never thought possible.
"Good morning," Spock said from behind me.
I turned to see him sitting on the dining room table with a mug of tea in one hand, the card I gave him for Christmas in another and my book was sitting on the table open to what seemed to be the middle or close to the end.
"Good morning," I said unsure of what to do. If he thought of returning that of what I gave him then there would be no return from the pain of his rejection a second time. I walked towards the table and he nodded as I sat in front of him.
"Would you like a cup of tea?" he asked.
I nodded not removing my gaze from the table.
As he stood be brought an already hot cup of tea. I refused to look at him, to look in his eyes. I was surprised when he took my face in both of his hands and forced me to look him in the eye.
"Tell me Nyota," he said his voice a rough whisper.
"Tell you what?" I said as if knowing I didn't know what he was asking. The cup of tea for the moment forgotten in the moment.
"Why do you think I would not care?" he asked I dared to look at his eyes and what I found was something I never thought could be found.
Pain. Love.
Now or never I guess.
"Because I saw you with Lt. Powers and heard the answer you gave her," I said my eyes starting to well up.
Realization seemed to dawn on his features.
"You heard the conversation between Lt. Powers and myself." He said, was that regret flashing through his features?
I nodded the tears coming down from my eyes.
"Nyota, please it was not is not what you think," he started to say.
"Don't, just stop if you don't care its fine I'm just your student," I cried at him slapping his hands away from my face. I started to get out of the chair and run the bathroom but his hand grabs my waist and pulls me close to the heat that is his body.
"No, Nyota you are more than just my student. You are a woman, a goddess, my shining star, my love, my soul." He said against my ear.
For Spock to say such things is difficult and he really does care if he is telling this. I turned and faced him tears still falling and said;
"Did you know?" I asked hoping he knows how much I love him.
"What?" he asked.
"That I am as in love with you as, as you are with me," I said scared out of my wits.
"Yes," he answered his hands taking their place on my waist again.
"Since when?" I asked now curious.
"Since the day at the beach when you asked me if I would love you," he said pulling me closer to him.
"Since then and you have never told me," I said letting him pull me close.
"I was as afraid as you were of being rejected," he said his face lowering closer to mine.
Before he could say anything else I brushed my lips against his. As I started to pull back he pulled me and crashed his lips to mine and kissed me with such a force that I was sure it was going to leave a bruise.
"Nyota, I really do love you," He said pulling his shirt over my head.
I began to remove his clothing and I told him before all thought could completely disappear from both of our minds.
"I love you too Spock," I said as I wrapped my legs around his waist.
A/N: I know its a little early for Christmas but had to get something out for you to read.
REVIEWS=LOVE
Anyone has any other decisions to make about "Unexpected Friends" send an email or review on the chapter titled "POLL"
Vulcan Dictionary
Kum'i – awake
Ashaya – Love
ki'sarlah nash-veh – I have come
Vu-tor-fam-tun-tor – You do not care