Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. I wish I did, but sadly I don't.

This is my first story. So if it's bad, live with it! OK here's my story, like it or lump it.READ MY OTHER STORY; ROYAL PAIN! IT'S UNDER THE PENNAME Psychotic Quartet.

"talking"

sounds

'thinking'

It All Started With Bird Poop

CH.1

The Yasha Gang was getting ready to go to a nearby village to see if the rumors of a jewel shard were true.

"Move it Kagome!" Inuyasha said irritably to the girl on the ground beside him.

"Inuyasha quit barkin' you big puppy." Kagome replied.

Inuyasha's face turns evil looking. "What… did…you…say?" Inuyasha was about to go crazy when Miroku butted into the conversation.

"Inuyasha, you should learn to be more tolerant and patient." He said calmly.

"Yes. Miroku is right, Inuyasha" said Sango, the demon slayer.

"OH… so now your taking the perverted priest's side." Inuyasha sneered.

"I AM A MONK!" Miroku screamed, his face turning red with anger.

"Well maybe if you would stop being so perverted, I might acknowledge that!" Inuyasha stated. Miroku was just about to explode when Shippo piped in.

"I don't think you have the right to look down on Miroku." he stated as-a-matter-of-factly.

"What'd ya mean, runt! I ain't a pervert!" Inuyasha said indignantly.

"Yeah but your a two-timer!" Shippo sneered. Inuyasha's cheeks turned red. Miroku stated to laugh and Sango was trying hard, but failing, not to giggle. Kagome also turned red, though she didn't exactly know why.

"Why yo-," PLOP. Inuyasha stood motionless, Shippo stared opened mouthed, and Kagome, Sango, and Miroku stared at the sky. They saw a crow flying away, cawing as if laughing. It had been quiet for a few seconds.

Until…..

"HA, HA! Inuyasha is a poopy-head, poopy-head, poopy-head!" Shippo sang as he danced around the stunned figure of Inuyasha. Everyone else watched with huge smiles on their faces, at least till Inuyasha went off.

"WHY YOU LITTLE-." He raged and lunged for Shippo. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Shippo squealed, "KAGOME SAVE ME!"

"GET OVER YOU LITTLE B-." "SIT!" From the force in her yell, he was kissing the ground reeeeeeealy hard.

"Goddamn it, bitch! What did I do?" he yelled his voice muffled, and his mouth filled with dirt.

"You were trying to kill Shippo! And one more thing! I AM NOT A BITCH! SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT!" she screamed. "AAHHHHHHH!" Inuyasha screamed at the same time.

As the now unconscious half-demon lay on the ground, Kagome went down on her knees to comfort the little fox pretending to cry.

"I-I-Inu-Inuy-y-ya-ash-sha almost k-k-killed m-me sniff." Shippo sobbed. "Oh Shippo, it's OK" Kagome soothed.

"You know what? You'd think that Inuyasha would learn from past mistakes." Sango said to Miroku. Miroku, not paying attention to a word she says, was looking down her body with nasty thoughts going through his head.

"Miroku! Hello! Are you in there?" Sango said waving a hand in front of his face. "And what are you staring at?" She started to cover herself.

"Oh sorry Sango. I agree, but," he started to grin that grin that he grins, "he's not the only one who doesn't learn." Then rub, rub. Sango blush a deep red color and… SLAP. "YOU PERVERT!" Sango screamed, as she started to hit him more.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Sango please don't kill me! I couldn't help it! Your body is too beautiful!" Miroku called over his shoulder, running for his life.

"Don't give me that crap, you perverted bastard! When I catch you, I'm going to make sure that you can never ask another woman to bear your child ever again!" She screamed.

"oooo…. Does that mean taking both our clothes off?" he stopped to look at her.

" NO! It means cutting IT off with my boomerang!" she yelled.

After hearing this, Miroku started to cry and scream like a girl run away again. "Oh no! Please don't do that, Sango!" he sobbed.

Kagome, Shippo (having finished crying), Kirara all started to watch Sango beat up Miroku with weird looks on their faces, until….

"Finally! I got you alone!" said a male voice behind Kagome.

Soon after the voice spoke there were hands on both her shoulders. This surprised Kagome. "AHH! Who's there?" She started, and spun around and slapped at the same time.

"OW! What was that for?" Koga said in pain, rubbing his face.

"Oh, I'm sorry Koga! I didn't know it was you!" 'Not really.'She said apologetically.

"It's OK. Now come. Kagome. Run away with me, and leave that stupid mutt face behind!" He said dramatically. "Because I love you more than HE does!"

'Since when did Inuyasha love me?' She thought, with that face she always gets when Koga's being this way. "Uh, Koga? I don't think you should be saying that right now. Heh, heh." She said nervously, looking over where Inuyasha was laying unconscious.

"What'd ya mean, Love. He ain't around to hear me" He said, batting a hand at the air.

Shippo, being grossed out by all this talk of love, started to edge away from the two adults. Kagome tried to follow suit, but Koga had one arm around her waist and the other hand holding hers.

While this was going on, Inuyasha was just starting to have coherent thought.

'My head hurts! Why the hell does she do that! Doesn't know that it frickin' hurts?' He thought groggily. 'Hey what's that smell? It smells like…..' He jumped up and looked around.

"KOGA! GET AWAY FROM KAGOME!" He yelled, advancing on Koga.

"Get away, Inutrasha! Can't you see that we're in love?" Koga said in a cutesy girly voice.

"What! Are you gay or something?" Inuyasha asked, surprised.

"WHAT! That's Jakotsu's job! I'm straight! You cold ask Ginta and Hakaku! Hey where'd they go?" He turned around and started to look in a bush that only Shippo could hide in.

"Ginta! Hakaku! Where are you guys!" He called

"I'm getting tired of this!" Inuyasha said, and kicked Koga in the butt.

"Why you mangy mutt!" Koga yelled enraged.

"You stupid wimpy wolf!" Inuyasha yelled back.

Then they started to fight, shouting insults at each other, and fighting over Kagome.

"I'd better go break them up. Kagome said annoyed.

She was about to do so when Kikyo (A/N: I HATE KIKYO!) came out of the forest

"Inuyasha, come to Hell with me, so we could be together forever." Kikyo called, obviously oblivious to Inuyasha and Koga fighting.

"KIKYO! Inuyasha's not going to Hell with you! If you want someone to go with you then take Koga!"

Everyone froze. Miroku stopped in mid-cower, Sango stopped in mid-swig, Koga stopped with a leg in the air, Inuyasha stopped in mid-leap, and Shippo (who was picking his nose) stopped in mid-pick; all with astonished faces.

" WHAT!" everyone said in unison.

" Oh uh…I mean, don't take Koga to Hell either! Heh heh." Kagome said sheepishly.

"Oh OK!" They all said and went back to what they were doing.

" Kikyo, keep the hell away from Inuyasha!" Kagome seethed.

"Who's going to make me?" Kikyo took a step forwards.

"I am, you dead bitch!" Kagome took a step forwards.

"Bite me!" Kikyo stuck out her tongue.

"GLADLY!" Kagome lunge at Kikyo, biting her arm. Kikyo retaliated by pulling her hair.

They continued to fight the way girls do, until Kikyo was beaten to death(A/N:YAY!), and Kagome, being very tired from kicking Kikyo's ass, blacked out.

Inuyasha and Koga's battle ended pretty much the same way, except Koga ran away almost dead, and Inuyasha also went out from tiredness.

Miroku was unconscious from a possibly serious concussion, and Sango was out cause she over exerted herself trying to kill Miroku.

Kirara, being a cat, was taking a nap. Shippo, being the only one still awake, was sad. "Hey! That's not fair! I want to be conked out too!" And then he hit himself with a rock.

…to be continued…

My first chapter of my first fic! I'm very proud of myself! I would like to thank Raging Psycho, my best friend, for helping me.

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