Disclaimer: I don't own Dark Angel or any of the characters.
The idea for the story came from the song Emotional by Diana DeGarmo
The italics are Alec's thoughts.
Emotional
"Damn it, Alec! Just Leave Me Alone!"
"Okay, okay—I'm going!" Alec backed up, hands raised up next to his face. He didn't realize it, but he had both a bemused expression and a slight smirk. Geez…what's wrong with her today? Alec thought, Yesterday she didn't care when I teased her—she hadn't minded for the last week. But today, the first thing I said got my head ripped off. He smirked to himself, finally finding some humor in the situation. Then she handed it back so I could go put it back on in private. He hoped she got over it, whatever 'it' was, soon. He hated not being able to talk to her. Even if something important came up, she'd be too busy yelling to realize that he was trying to tell her something serious. Well, if something does come up, I'll just have Mole tell her, he thought. If she told him off, Mole would either shrug it off, or rip Max a good one. Either way, Alec was safe.
"Hey Alec,"
Alec snapped out of his reverie, to see Joshua standing in front of him.
"Oh, hey Josh, what's up?"
"Heard Max yell. What's wrong with Max?"
"You'd have to ask her, buddy."
"Oh. Okay."
Alec was amazed to see Joshua headed to the command center of Terminal City, where Max was glaring at a computer—though a terrified looking X-4.
"Uh, Josh…"
"Yes Alec?"
"You, uh, you might want to wait 'till she's cooled off a little," Alec said. He liked Joshua, and didn't see the sense in letting him get his head taken off. Well, not with out warning.
"Nope. Something's up with Little Fella. Joshua find out what."
"If you say so, Josh. Just don't say I didn't warn you."
"Okay."
Alec wandered off, still smiling softly at Joshua's nickname for Max.
Joshua watched Max stomp around the command center. Every one was staying out of her way. That was a bad sign. He came up the steps and stopped, deciding on the best way to approach her. He though he might know what the storms in her eyes were about…
He stepped into her path, and she stopped just short of plowing into him. Her glare softened minimally when she saw standing in front of her.
"Hey Little Fella."
"Hey Big Fella."
"Wanna show you something."
"Oh. Okay,"
Joshua felt some of the tension in the command center dissipate when Max agreed to leave. It made him sad that Max was unhappy, but he was also sad that she took it out on every one who cared about her.
"What's up Joshua?" Max had looked around Joshua's room when she entered—and didn't see anything out of the ordinary. Well, not for Joshua, anyway.
"New Painting." Joshua stated, turning the easel around to face the wall.
"Oh yeah? Can I see?"
"Nope."
"Huh?"
"Not unless you promise to be nice."
"I am nice!"
"You're nice to Joshua. You're mean to everyone else today."
"I am Not!" Max yelled. Then she froze, looking immensely guilty. "I'm sorry Big Fella. I didn't mean to yell at you."
"I know, Little Fella." Joshua looked at her, wondering if he should ask now, or wait. Wait, he decided. "Now you can see new painting."
Max smiled. So did Joshua. He turned the paint to face the room, and took of the sheet that had been covering it.
It was a painting of Max. And Joshua. And Alec, Logan, Mole, Original Cindy. There were others, too. Max picked out the faces of Gem and her baby. Sketchy, Luke, Dix, Dalton… Even Normal. And in the back, a shade difference in the colors showed the silhouette and barely there features of Cece.
"Joshua, this is wonderful."
"Good. I'm going to put it out there." Joshua gestured toward the command center a few buildings away. "Then everyone can see -- We're a family."
"Yeah. Yeah, that's good Joshua."
"What's wrong with Little Fella?"
"Huh? Oh, I'm fine."
"No. Little Fella's not fine. Little Fella doesn't yell when she's fine."
Max looked up at Joshua and thought, What the hell. Why not?
"I went and saw Logan yesterday." Max paused, but Joshua was silent, so she continued. "He asked how I was, and how Alec was; and then he asked why I was there. I didn't have a reason. Not one I could tell him, anyway." She sighed
"Max loves Logan," Joshua said.
"Yeah, Big Fella. I do."
Then why doesn't Max tell Logan she loves him?"
"Cause he'd just get hurt."
"So would Little Fella, maybe."
"Yeah."
Joshua just sat and looked at her, and then Max was giving him her best reason to keep Logan away. It sounded to Joshua as though she was trying to convince herself.
"I'll get him killed Joshua. Either I'll give him the virus again, or he'll get caught in the crossfire."
"Isn't that Logan's choice?"
"Not this time. Not when I'd be the one that had to live with getting him killed."
"Oh."
Joshua was quiet for a minuet, then, "Little Fella not think like Little Fella. Little Fella fights for freedom, but won't let Logan choose."
Max was a little aggravated now. She knew he was right. But she was right too.
"So I'm a hypocrite. I can live with that. As long as Logan is safe, I can live with being a hypocrite."
"Okay, Little Fella."
His ton struck Max.
"What?"
"Just sad."
"Why?"
"Little Fella sad. Logan sad. Alec sad. Joshua sad too."
"Alec? What's wrong with Alec?"
Joshua tried to smile—it worked, kind of. "He doesn't know why Little Fella yells at him."
"Oh. I guess I should apologize to him, too, huh."
"Yes. And tell Alec why you yell."
"Joshua, he wouldn't get it. He's"
"He is Alec. Smart-Alec. And he loves Max." Max's blank look made him say hastily, "Joshua loves Max too. So does Cindy, and, and…"
"It's okay, Big Fella. I get it. He's my friend." He is? Huh. I guess he is. How about that? "But I still don't want to tell him about going to see Logan."
"You should."
"Hmm"
Joshua sighed gustily. "Go find Alec, Little Fella."
"Wha—"
Joshua pointed at his painting. "It needs finished. Joshua find Max when he's ready to take it outside."
"Okay, okay. I'm going."
It took 20 minuets of hunting to find Alec. Max was rather proud of herself—she had done as Joshua asked, and kept her temper on a leash. It was easier now, though. She was suspicious that talking to him had helped.
"Hey Alec." Said a voice behind him
"Jeez Max," he said, jumping. Where did she come from?
"What are you doing that you didn't hear me?"
"I wasn't listening."
"Smart-alec."
"You told me that I was a long time ago."
"True."
"So did you come to sneak up on me, or…"
"Yeah, um. Well, I was just talking to Joshua…"
"Oh," Here we go Alec thought. Now I'm in trouble for talking to Joshua about her.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you earlier. You didn't deserve it."
"What?"
"Alec,"
"Hey, I'm just surprised." He wasn't going to say just how surprised he was. It would get him hit.
"Yeah, well…"
She's uncomfortable. He thought. I would be, if I was in her place, but she's getting more fidgety, not less. That's not how it's supposed to work. There must be something else up.
"You alright Max?"
"Yeah. I'm fine."
Well, there went that. No more emotion, no more expression, she's not even moving. I wonder if she knows that she looks like she's at attention when she does that.
"Max, what's wrong?"
"I said I'm fine," and she turned around to leave.
"If you didn't need to say something else, you wouldn't have tracked me down. You would have waited till later and pulled me aside." She stopped. Will she talk to me, or try to kill me? He wondered.
"I went and saw Logan yesterday. Last night. It was horrible and I was taking it out on you. Not because it's your fault. Just because you were there."
"Oh, Max."
That was all he said, then he got up and walk to her. She turned to face him. He pulled her into a rough hug, and she let him do it.
Then she felt hot tears beginning to well up in her eyes.
"God, Alec. How can I do this? I know he loves me, and I'm making us both miserable..."
"Max, its okay Max. You're aloud to be afraid." He couldn't believe that this was happening. She was opening up to him. Again. She actually trusted him. Not too fast, now, boy. She might not have anyone else to talk to. But she just said that she'd been talking to Joshua.
"Max, it's going to be okay. You're going to get through this. And I'll be here for you. Always." Max looked up at him, eyes still streaming, and was obviously a little confused by his offer. "I'm still going to take care of you, ya know. You're my responsibility now. Not that I'm complaining," he added quickly, seeing that she was about to get angry with her for bringing up That topic. "Max, please don't get mad at me. I'm just trying to cheer you up."
She had pulled away a bit when he'd commented on the fact that Logan thought they were together. She pulled away farther now. "I'm sorry I went to pieces like that," she said. "I'm just very emotional right now." She looked up me, and then away. "I guess I needed someone."
"Like I said, Max, I'll be here."
She looked back at him again. Maybe she saw what he was hinting at, and maybe she didn't. But she wasn't going to say so if she had. He could tell that right off.
"Thanks."
"No prob. Hey, where ya headed?"
"To Joshua's room. He had a new painting that he almost finished, and he wanted me to come when he put it up."
"Oh. Do you think he would mind if I came too?" Alec waited, wondering if she could still be comfortable with him after her moment of vulnerability.
"No. I think he'd love it." Max turned and walked out the door, and Alec, smiling, followed her.
