Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Really, I live in a shoebox. And even that isn't mine. In fact, I am stealing this computer. And these shoes.

He Remembered

Better Than Me

I think you can do much better than me
After all the lies that I made you believe

The shadow of a lifeless tree haunted the edge of the tent above Harry's head. He traced the pattern the branches made on the canvas with the tips of his fingers, thinking about her again.

Ginny should be with someone who made her feel safe – who she was safe with, unlike with him. She should be with somebody who could tell her everything, unlike him. Ginny had the right to know everything, and Harry could rarely tell her anything. She needed to be free to laugh, not stuck in a tent, pretending to be asleep, like him. She needed to be with somebody who would help her laugh and love and live.

Guilt kicks in and I start to see
The edge of the bed where your nightgown used to be

But he could help Ginny like that, almost as much as she helped him.

Harry rolled over on the bunk and, as the wood creaked beneath him, ran a hand over the sheet next to him. Empty.

I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you

So it had been a dream… of course it had been a dream. Harry almost laughed at himself for being so stupid.

But it had felt so real, having her there. Harry remembered what she felt like beside him.

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes

He remembered how her hair smelled, how it tickled his face.

He remembered how her lips tasted, soft and yielding beneath his.

And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

Remembering their last kiss reminded him of why he left, and why he shouldn't ve thinking about this. About her.

She deserved someone who was able to guarantee her a happy ending. He couldn't do that; he couldn't even grant himself a content ending.

While looking through your old box of notes
I found those pictures I took
That you were looking for

Harry pulled his wand out from under his pillow, along with the Marauders map.

"Lumos. I solemnly swear I am up to no good," Harry whispered, laughing quietly at the irony of the phrase. This was the last thing he should be doing.

As the map materialized in front of him, Harry automatically found the girls' dormitories.

He remembered getting magically thrown down the stairs one night when they 'said' goodbye to far up them. Harry smiled.

If there's one memory I don't want to lose
That time at the mall
You and me in the dressing room

He remembered entering the common room, first excited and exhausted, then not feeling anything – just seeing Ginny run toward him, and then feeling everything at once.

I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you

Harry remembered how she made him laugh, made him forget about everything except them both. And how she constantly rendered him speechless.

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes

It was stupid to let her go. Harry wished he could be selfish, he wished he could forget again now and just be next to her.

And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

Harry wished her could give her everything. He wished he could promise Ginny the sun and the stars, or at the very least happiness.

Just a small favor in return for her being one of the only things keeping him alive.

The bed I'm lying in is getting colder
Wish I never would've said it's over

A gush of wind swept through the tent, the tree outside responding with a scraping noise.

He wished he'd stayed with her, he wished he was there with her. He wished Ginny could know everything, and for a moment he even wished that Ginny, instead of Hermione, was sitting in the doorway reading.

And I can't pretend
I won't think about you when I'm older
Cause we never really had our closure

He knew that was a horrible thing to wish, because it was everything bad lined up for everything good. Ginny being here.

Harry found Ginny on the map again – her dot was moving half a centimeter every two or so minutes, as if she were sleeping restlessly.

It pained him to watch, he wished he could be there with her, he wished he could whisper in her ear.

Harry knew he'd always think about her like this. As much as it hurt him, it was also comforting to know he'd never forget about her.

This can't be the end

Because he loved her, so it wasn't over. Not really, anyway.

I really need your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes

He loved her, and he missed her, and he needed her.

He needed her hair in his face, her lips on his, her voice in his head.

And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

But she deserved better.

And he needed accept that, because as long she was happy, so was he.

A/N: Yes? No? Maybe so?

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