Losing Her Edge
By Laura Schiller
Based on: Shugo Chara
Copyright: Peach Pit
"Tadase-kun?"
"Yes?"
Amu and Tadase were walking home from a Royal Garden meeting, their shugo charas asleep in their pockets, past sunny green gardens and white suburban homes. A bunch of kids were playing basketball on one driveway; two ladies were sipping iced drinks and chatting on the front porch. It was a warm day for April, almost summery; graduation was imminent, and it had Amu in a contemplative mood.
"I heard some girls at school talking the other day," she said. "In the bathroom … they didn't really know I was there, so I was kind of eavesdropping. They were talking about me … they say Hinamori's losing her edge, that I'm not half as cool and spicy as it used to be. Do you think that's true?"
The memory stung a bit; it was the way they had said it – almost gleefully, as if a dip in the famed Joker's Chair's populaity was a better chance for them. Amu scrunched up her face in disgust.
Tadase's red eyes were thoughtful. "What do you think, Amu-chan? Would you like it to be true?"
"Well – yeah!" she said immediately. "I mean … that's how all this started in the first place. Me hatching three charas, joining the Guardians … I wanted to get rid of that persona. I'm just wondering … is it working, Tadase-kun? Am I more myself than I used to be?"
Tadase blushed a little and ran a hand through his sweep of blond hair, as if unsure of his response. It was a difficult question, and Amu was immediately sorry for asking it – al the same, she would like to know.
"I'm not sure," said Tadase. "You see … it's not as if I can read your mind, Amu-chan. I have no idea if your own image of yourself matches the one other people have. All I know is … being with you is much easier than it was two years ago."
He took her hand and laced her fingers through his. As ever, being touched by him made her heart pound and her face flush.
"See, Amu-chan … when I first knew you, you would have yanked your hand away. I'd never have known if you really didn't want to be touched, or if you were just being cool-and-spicy. Now, I can tell by the look on your face that holding hands makes you happy. And that makes me very happy indeed."
He gave her one of his sunshiny smiles. She grinned back, not even caring if it looked silly.
"You used to have this way of folding your arms and talking out the side of your mouth, saying things like 'It's no big deal' or 'who cares?'. You haven't done that for … I don't know … months. You don't hide your emotions anymore. You laugh easily, you're not ashamed to cry … and sometimes you speak with all the wisdom and compassion of an adult woman."
He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it, making her gasp. She felt as if they were floating together in a bubble of rosy light.
"So yes, Amu-chan. If I am qualified to judge, I will say that you shine brighter every day."
At moments like this, usually she would forget herself and call him a prince, which would trigger his unfortunate chara-change and effectively spoil the moment. Instead, dazed with happiness and almost floating along the sidewalk, Amu let something else slip.
"I love you, Tadase-kun … "
As soon as it was out, Amu let out a yelp and clapped her hands to her mouth.
"Wha – did I just say that?"
Tadase did not laugh at her (though it must have taken all his gentlemanly tact to stop himself). He only nodded.
"Er … you don't mind, do you? Sudden confessions are kind of your department, after all … " She giggled nervously, fiddling with her hairclips.
"I love you too, Amu-chan," he replied, beaming. "Now, why don't you we go for ice cream? It's awfully hot outside today."
That was Tadase's oblique way of referring to her blush, and she knew it quite well. A cold snack would be absolutely perfect.
No, you stupid girls, she decided. I'm not losing my edge. I'm the Joker, the trump card,, bearer of four charas, who's saved too many heart's eggs to count. And I've got the best boyfriend on the face of the planet. It doesn't get much edgier than that.